The Beast of Survival - singlewheelrolling - 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System (2024)

Chapter 1: The Escape

Chapter Text

It was cold in his dark little cell, snow and moonlight drifting in from the window above him. During summer it had been too warm, the air clammy and cloying on his skin, moisture collecting in his lungs and making it hard to breathe. Now however, he found that the days left him cold and the nights left him frozen. At night his breath crystalized in the air, freezing as it touched his face. His fingers turned uncooperative when the temperature dropped, refusing to bend to help the blood flow. His toes turned blue and entered that dangerous stage where they in the end stopped hurting. He knew he was going to die there.

It had been two days since Luo Binghe last visited him. Luo Binghe had been his usual cruel self, dripping poisoned words into his ears as he used his qi to set Shen Qingqiu’s body on fire, mocking him for his broken golden core. Unaware that Shen Qingqiu was hiding away the last slivers of his cultivation to use at the right moment.

The beast had said something vile, referring to the rumors that Shen Qingqiu was a predator, that he preyed on women, and finally, finally, he had found the strength to slap him. With his one available hand, the one not chained to the wall, he had struck him with all his remaining strength and had immediately realized he had fallen right into Luo Binghe’s trap. He had given Luo Binghe the misguided justification to do what he already wanted to do.

Luo Binghe had taken the strike with eerie calmness, merely grabbing his hand before Shen Qingqiu could retrieve it. He held his hand with false gentleness, his fingers running along his palm, tracing the fine lines there. Shen Qingqiu had tried to tug his arm back, but Luo Binghe’s gentle touch had turned into a steel clamp around his wrist. He had uncurled every finger, traced every joint, before he had brough the hand to his lips and given the palm a mocking kiss. Only then had Shen Qingqiu been allowed to take his hand back. Only then had Luo Binghe left.

His touch had been gentle, but the way his eyes had lingered on every knuckle, on every joint from his fingers to his shoulder spoke of future pain. Nothing Luo Binghe did in his presence was whimsical, he acted purely on purpose when he hurt Shen Qingqiu. The kiss had been mocking, had been a last blessing, had been a signal of damnation. Shen Qingqiu knew that once Luo Binghe returned, he would lose his hand, his entire arm, possibly even both.

If he wanted to escape, it was now or never.

-

He had been imprisoned for almost a year following the sham of a trial he had refused to entertain. With the sect’s reputation and existence in jeopardy he had pleaded guilty immediately, refusing to let Luo Binghe drag it out and tarnish the sect further than Shen Qingqiu had already done just by existing.

His golden core had been broken, but his spirit had remained whole, if severely beaten. Luo Binghe had cut his hair, had refused him any clothes except a replica of Luo Binghe’s old disciple robes. He had been beaten, tortured, mocked, and humiliated, starved to the brink of death only to be denied release. He knew he deserved so much more than this. He deserved so much less.

With Luo Binghe gone no one had bothered to check if he had been fed, and he would use the neglect to his advantage. The beast had told him he would be gone for at least a week, and the guards usually forgot about Shen Qingqiu for the first few days.

Shen Qingqiu waited in the moonlight, listening intently. Outside his cell he could hear the earthwings sing their nightly tune. The entire castle’s inhabitants were all asleep or in their rooms by the time the earthwings came out of their burrows. Winged and mole-like, the earthwings were remnants of the previous castle lord’s experiments. Luo Binghe and his ilk had eradicated most of the unfortunate beings that had been experimented on, but some still roamed this part of the Demon Realm. Most of them barely survived, but the earthwings thrived, filling the night air with their haunting songs.

Shen Qingqiu listened to them sing as he got to work. The shackles restraining his hand was done so Luo Binghe could enjoy watching Shen Qingqiu stretch as far as he could for food and water placed just out of reach. His hands were almost skeletal, and he rubbed his bony wrist against the sharp edge of the shackle until the blood flowed freely. With his free hand he used the blood as lubrication, smearing it around his restrained hand until it glistened in the moonlight.

Shen Qingqiu took hold of his thumb and took several deep breaths. On the last exhale he pulled on his thumb as hard as he could, whimpering as he felt the ligaments rip. With a last effort he pulled on the hand before it could swell and slipping his hand free with a pained gasp.

There were no guards stationed outside his cell because Luo Binghe was jealous in his revenge. He didn’t want anyone else to see Shen Qingqiu, didn’t want anyone to see how depraved Luo Binghe was when doling out his punishments. Didn’t want anyone to take pity on Shen Qingqiu and granting him release, either by freedom or by death. There were only two demonic guards allowed to feed him when Luo Binghe was away, and both usually forgot about their duties regarding him. He had passed out from hunger more than once while Luo Binghe was away, only to reawake to Luo Binghe force-feeding him broth until he was so full he vomited most of it back up.

The cell was always left unlocked, a stroke of luck for Shen Qingqiu. It was a dark wooden door with a small square window, different from the first cell door that had been made of impenetrable metal and set with locks that were loud as they were turned, to really drive home the point that Shen Qingqiu was trapped in his cell forever. But then, one desperate night, he had come so close to successfully ending his life. In the end Luo Binghe had to slam the door off its hinges to get to him in time, to reverse the damages he had done to himself.

Luo Binghe had spent weeks making sure Shen Qingqiu would never dare to try to take his own life again. Shen Qingqiu had spent weeks pretending to be cowed by the beast.

And now there was an out, a chance of escape. He could have used the sharp shackle to let his blood flow like a river, but there was something in him that wanted to live. Luo Binghe had taken away his desire to end himself, but he hadn’t taken away Shen Qingqiu’s will to escape.

Luo Binghe had become so sure Shen Qingqiu didn’t have the means nor the will to escape that he left the door unlocked. The door was silent as he slowly opened it, as Luo Binghe kept it in perfect condition. Shen Qingqiu assumed it was so Luo Binghe could slip in unnoticed while he slept, hovering over him as he startled awake from a nightmare.

It was a good thing there was no one to watch him slip away, as he had no strength to fight them. It also meant there was no opportunity to get his hands on a sword or warmer clothes. All he had was himself. It would have to be enough.

He made his way through the abandoned prison, walking quickly but silently, making sure there would be n guards suddenly appearing. It was dark and damp and moldy, and Shen Qingqiu couldn’t wait to get out of there, but when he finally reached the door leading to the outside he hesitated. He opened it cautiously and was immediately knocked back by the howling wind. There was a snowstorm outside, the wind howling around him, bringing in heaps of snow from outside for every moment he kept the door open.

With substantial effort he managed to close the door, leaning back against it in exhaustion. He looked down at his bare feet, his toes pink, verging on blue. There was nothing to do about it, his only chance of escape was through that door.

With trembling hands he reached down and tore the bottom of his robe into strips. One strip he tied around his still bleeding wrist, the others he tied around his feet. It wouldn’t be enough to keep his feet from sustaining injuries if he stayed outside too long, but it was better than nothing. The cloth would also be protection against any sharp rocks he might step on. Even if he was so cold he couldn’t feel his feet, it would be best not to injure himself more than he had to.

With his feet wrapped up he pulled the door wide open and escaped into the night. The first steps were the worst, his body begging him to turn back as he waded through the knee-deep snow. He pulled his head down, bracing against the wind as he followed the castle walls until he reached the side closest to the nearby forest.

There was no one in sight on the grounds, the snow left unmarked by any passing guard. Shen Qingqiu risked a glance upwards, seeing no one standing on top of the castle walls. He scoffed to himself. Luo Binghe’s soldiers had become complacent as Luo Binghe’s powers had grown, his reach and his influence enough for them to think no one would dare attack them. It was a stupid mistake, one that could cost them dearly, but it worked in his favor. If no one was watching for intruders, no one was watching for anyone escaping either.

He dashed across the snowy field and slipped into the dark forest, tucking his aching hands into his armpits to preserve his fingers. If he was lucky no one would notice he was gone until the snow had covered his tracks completely. It could buy him time to cross the border to the western kingdom, one he knew Luo Binghe still didn’t have control over. Luo Binghe had promised to take him there once he conquered it, to take him swimming in the sulfuric hot springs in the west. He was sure it was more drowning than swimming that Luo Binghe planned for him to do. Or perhaps he was just going to throw him in and watch him desperately swim back as his skin peeled off. Whatever Luo Binghe had planned it wouldn’t have been pleasant.

As he stomped through the snow, now only reaching midcalf thanks to the shelter of the trees, he preferred this to be his end. If it came to it he preferred dying in the snow, knowing he died alone and by his own choice, and not dying by Luo Binghe’s hand, by Luo Binghe’s will.

An unseen root hooked over his foot and he stumbled, slamming into a tree. Alarm ran through him when he realized neither the stumbling nor the slam had been painful. The moon shone through the treetops, its position revealing that half the night had passed since his escape. He had made decent progress in his escape, but it was taking its toll on his body. Since he couldn’t feel most of his body he would soon have to find shelter, somewhere to hide. The border was a few days away in this weather, but while the storm was a hinder to him, it would also hinder any pursuers.

Trudging on, he was careful as he walked on through the forest. He might not feel a sprain or a cut, but a broken leg would be hard to ignore. His breath froze as it left his mouth, the moisture on his skin already forming a hard layer on his face. His eyes stung in the cold, and when he rubbed one eye he felt the unpleasant sensation of his eyelashes breaking.

Shen Qingqiu trudged on, and at the edge of the forest he looked around, the storm making it hard to find the mountain range he would have to navigate by. A lull in the wind allowed him to see the white mountain top, closer than he expected. If the mountain was on the right it meant the river would be on the left, and he was precisely where he needed to be, if his knowledge was correct. All he had to base his escape on was Luo Binghe’s bragging and the memory of a map he had once glanced at more than a five years ago.

A mountain usually meant caves, or at the very least an overhang he could hide underneath. It would take some time, but if he angled his direction right it would not eat into his estimated window of escape too much. If he reached the bend of the mountain it would allow him cover from any view from the forest in the morning, if the storm subsided enough for anyone to see more than a few feet in front of them.

His movements were slow, the snow almost waist high now that he no longer had the cover of the trees. His muscles refused to lift his legs high enough, fast enough. Still, he persisted. He stumbled and fell, foot catching on nothing or something he couldn’t feel. The snow threatened to cover him immediately as he struggled to get up, his arms not cooperating with him as he clawed his way up from the snow.

Somewhere along the way his body had gone from trembling to straight up shaking, and shakes were so hard they were threatening to knock him off his feet again. He kept his eyes on the mountain, even as his mind drifted to far better places. He was no longer somewhere in the freezing Demon Realm, he was back at his peak. He was safe and warm, sitting underneath the bamboo trees on a warm summer day, conversing with Liu Qingge. His mind replayed the last part. That wasn’t right. Liu Qingge was-, he was-.

It was getting too warm, and he tugged on his robe. The tug made him stumble and he fell again, falling into the warmth. Somewhere in the back of his mind a voice was shouting for him to get up and the shouting continued until he listened, until he got back up, his back now to the mountain. The shouting was replaced by a loud rumble, threatening to drown out the conversation he was having.

It was too loud, what was it? With a start and a frisson of fear he turned around, knowing what he was about to see. A wall of white was rushing down the mountain, enveloping trees and pulling them with it.

Shen Qingqiu only had a moment to close his mouth and clench his teeth before the wall hit him, sweeping him with it as it continued on its way to the river. He was tossed around like he was nothing, as he tried to swim to the surface without knowing which way was up. The roaring continued around him as he was knocked around, unable to do more than try to move.

Something collided with his ribs, and even the cold couldn’t prevent the pain that stabbed through his chest. His scream was smothered by the roaring snow, drowning out any sound he made.

The avalanche slowed down as it reached the river, and halfway through it came to a stop. He dug his way out of the snow with his last strength, gasping as he breached the surface. The snow gave way underneath him as he crawled along it and slid down, unable to stop himself from falling into the icy water.

The water immediately pulled him down, forcibly tugging him along and dragging him down to the bottom. The rushing river tore at him, throwing him around as hard as the avalanche had done. He struggled to reach the surface and just as he did he slammed into a rock. With heaving breath he clung to it until the river took hold of him again, pulling him along. The turbulent water threatened to pull him down again but he struggled, swimming more like a creature than a man, movements desperate and frantic.

He had almost nothing left to give when he was slammed into another rock, but this time the water pushed him around the rock towards the riverbank. It was enough to let him reach for another rock, and his frozen fingers closer around an edge, allowing him to pull himself into a calmer part of the river. Solid ground was underneath his feet and he limped forward, supporting himself on the various rocks. He crawled as far as he could, pulling himself halfway out of the water.

He had nothing left to give, no spare reserve of strength hidden within him. He would die there like a drowned animal, frozen to death by the elements. Tears formed in his eyes, freezing solid as soon as they trailed down his face. His robe was growing stiff, along with his body. But he didn’t want to die there, even if it was better than dying by Luo Binghe’s hand.

Desperate to live, he lifted one pale blue hand. He bit into the fleshy part at the base of his thumb, tearing into the skin. Blood flowed sluggishly to the surface, and he hastened to dip into it. He used it as ink to write a spell on his chest, calling for strength and protection, for warmth and survival. To activate it he used the last remnant of his cultivation, the last pieces of cultivation Luo Binghe hadn’t been able to detect nor destroy. The activation of the spell pulled everything he had from him, casting him into oblivion as he was engulfed in light.

-

An unknown time later, Shen Qingqiu woke up. On all fours he crawled out of his stiff robes and stretched before shaking himself. He ambled away on massive paws, gait unsure but growing steadier with each step. Ears forward and tail low, he turned towards the direction of the border.

Chapter 2: Lost and found

Chapter Text

Luo Binghe was knee-deep in negotiation a takeover of the Eastern Domain when a servant knocked on the door. Well, on his knees anyhow, behind and deep in the Queen of the Eastern Domain.

The Queen was unruffled at the interruption, used to servants milling about as she did what she wanted to do, uncaring if anyone saw what she got up to in her bed. One of Luo Binghe’s servants entered the room, trembling and squeaking as they informed him that Shen Qingqiu had gone missing.

He pushed himself away from the bed in a hurry, ignoring the indignant squeak that followed, anger licking up his spine as the message registered. He stumbled across the room, forgoing tying his robes and pulled on his pants so hard they threatened to rip at the seams.

Shen Qingqiu had dared to defy him? Had dared to think he could escape Luo Binghe? He would find him. He would find him and crush whatever defiance was still left in the man.

He swung Xin Mo without another word, tearing a hole in the space in front of him and stepping through to his castle, not bothering to tell the Queen goodbye. One of his servants would make excuses for him, and his most experienced assistants would handle any negotiations that still needed to be done.

The reception hall was full of servants, some of them quivering in the corners, some of them groveling on the floor, all of them refusing to look him in the eyes. Mobei-jun was the only one standing tall and looking at him, having been back in his own kingdom when Shen Qingqiu escaped.

“Where is he?” Luo Binghe shouted as he stalked across the hall, watching even the bravest of them flinch from his tone.

Mobei-jun gestured to the servants. “The guards don’t know anything. None of them know when he escaped, only that it’s somewhere in the last five to six days.”

“Have they not checked up on him since I left?” He turned towards the guards responsible for watching Shen Qingqiu, feeling his anger surge higher and letting it bleed into his voice. “How can you not know when he escaped?”

“Junshang, we’re sorry!” Both the guards kowtowed in front of him, shaking like leaves. The sight made him tighten his grip on Xin Mo’s hilt.

“It was a misunderstanding; we didn’t check because we thought the other was responsible for the prisoner!” They were trying to protect each other, neither taking nor giving the blame, thinking that it would save them from his wrath. His grip tightened further and he swung his blade, already turning towards the other servants before the severed heads fell to the floor.

“Find him, now!” He shouted at the people around them, gesturing for them to leave.

Luo Binghe turned and stalked out of the hall, closely followed by Mobei-jun. He made his way to the dungeon, to the little cell Shen Qingqiu had called home for the last year.

There was little to look at within the four damp walls. Some straw gathered into a lump on the floor, a bucket in one corner. Little drawings carved into the walls where Shen Qingqiu could reach; two butterflies dancing between two bamboo trees, two birds flying above two mountain tops. Two rivers crossing each other, each carrying two boats.

He crouched by the shackle to inspect it. It was still whole, still intact. Covered in a rusty red material that spilled across the floor in big, fat circles.

“The blood leads to the backdoor, where it stops.” Mobei-jun looked at him from the doorway, studying him in silence. He always seemed to be studying him whenever Shen Qingqiu was the topic.

He marched out of the cell, following the trail of blood to the forementioned door. It seemed like a lot of blood for someone who had seemed so small when Luo Binghe last had seen him. How much blood could one broken cultivator stand to lose?

The door was currently shut, the floor wet and slippery with water. A small strip of cloth laid crumbled by the corner next to the door. It had once been white, but now it was dirty grey, the edges of the fabric ragged and torn. He lifted it up to his face and inhaled through his nose. It smelled like Shen Qingqiu, like desperation and despair. Like betrayal and filth.

Mobei-jun opened the door and the sun spilled across their faces, bouncing of the blinding snow. “The conditions are perfect for a pursuit, if you wish.” Mobei-jun inclined his head, watching him.

The sun was shining, but he could feel the cold biting at his skin. If Shen Qingqiu was out there and still alive he needed to be found before it was too late.

He gave Mobei-jun a too-sharp smile, refusing to appear anxious even to his closest friend. “We have no time to waste.”

Together they gathered up a few of the guards who weren’t part of the original search and saddled the horses before setting out. The horses were eager and ready to go, exited at the opportunity to stretch their legs. He scratched behind his horse’s ear, letting it trot along as they ventured into the forest. Even if he was anxious to find Shen Qingqiu it wouldn’t do to work the horses too hard in the cold.

He had neglected his horses lately, the bad weather and all the negotiations and planning taking up too much time for him to exercise them properly. Back in the day Shen Qingqiu had never let him ride the horses and the other disciples always made always him carry everything by himself, running along as they rode ahead. It made him dream of owning one himself, and now he owned too many to count.

The brown horse he was riding was his favorite, the first one he had bought after he escaped the Endless Abyss. It was an odd little thing, an unplanned mix of Baise and Heihe. It made his horse a sturdy, hardy creature perfect for the cold conditions they were currently in.

“Good job, Walnut,” he said, patting her neck as she trotted through the forest.

The guards closest to him gave him a look, either unnerved by his kind tone or taken aback by the horse’s name. He shot them a glare and they fell back, finally fanning out properly to begin their search.

The forest was quiet except the sounds of the horses and the demonic dogs sniffing the ground for any trace of the prisoner. The sun was high above them and shining through the evergreen leaves, but it was still deadly cold for a human. Especially someone as weak and frail as Shen Qingqiu.

He shifted in his saddle, frowning as he looked around for any indication that Shen Qingqiu had been there. The likelihood that he was still nearby, or even alive, was almost zero. Perhaps if he had brought with him supplies and proper clothing, but Mobei-jun had informed him that nothing appeared to be missing from the castle.

He should have given Shen Qingqiu his blood so he could track him in situations like these. But he had rejected the idea, refusing to give the man his own blood, to give something so precious to someone who was less than trash. And now he was regretting it. At least then he would have known if Shen Qingqiu was still alive.

Just as they were reaching the end of the forest one of the demonic dogs bayed from somewhere in the distance, and he urged Walnut to hurry up. The dog was indicating at the edge of what looked like a recent avalanche, and the rest of the dogs joined in, leaping across the snow and sniffing for any trace. His hands tightened around the reins as his heart pounded in his chest. There was no chance Shen Qingqiu survived if he had been there when the avalanche happened.

They stopped at the edge and waited for a signal from the dogs. The cold air stung his eyes, but all he could really focus on was a metallic taste in his mouth. Shen Qingqiu couldn’t be dead, he refused to allow him to die out here, alone and away from Luo Binghe.

“Look, over there!” One of the guards pointed to a dog down by the river, and they observed as it paced back and forth across the riverbank, seemingly eager to cross the busy river.

The horses trotted down, easily plowing through the snow until they reached the river.

“Let’s cross where it’s calmest. Carry the dogs,” Luo Binghe said and let Walnut wade across the safest part of the river, the others following in a line behind him.

Safely on the other side the dogs leapt back into action, scurrying up and down the riverbank for any clue. Walnut carried him diligently as he too searched the ground from his vantage point.

He looked down the river and something in the water caught his eye. He jumped off his horse and made his way across a bundle of slippery rocks, treading carefully to not fall. A white robe had been caught by a branch and curled around a frosty rock. Luo Binghe lifted it, taking note of the torn edges and the pink tinge on one sleeve. He looked up at the forest in front of them. Shen Qingqiu had made it to the river, but then he had lost his robe. His mind told him that there was no way Shen Qingqiu had survived after going into the river. There was no way for a human to survive in such harsh conditions.

The robe’s thin fabric tore in his tight grip, fingernails digging into the flesh of his palm. Somewhere in his chest a stabbing pain bloomed. His breath shortened, the cold air stinging his eyes and making it hard to see.

Fury raged within him and threatened to spill over. How dared Shen Qingqiu? How dared he defy Luo Binghe of what was rightfully his? His death was Luo Binghe’s to control, to shape, to decide.

A baying sound came from deep within the forest, followed by a menacing growl. His anger interrupted, Luo Binghe turned back and mounted Walnut, stuffing the robe into one of the saddlebags.

He followed the sounds of barking and growling, until he reached the edge of a clearing, closely followed by Mobei-jun and the guards.

There, in the middle of the clearing was a dark shape, more teeth than fur. It stopped growling as they approached, warily watching the dogs that surrounded it. It bared its teeth at Luo Binghe as he dismounted but stood still as he approached.

As he came closer it became obvious why the wolflike creature hadn’t fled when they approached. Around the right front paw was a metal trap digging into its skin, blood staining the snow a dark red.

Luo Binghe crouched down as he approached, hands up in what he hoped would be interpreted as a gesture of trust. The beast growled a low warning as he came neared.

“It’s alright. I won’t hurt you,” he said as he reached out slowly.

“You should put it out of its misery. It looks messed up. Is it one of the escaped experiments?” One of the guards spoke up behind him, and Luo Binghe turned his head to shoot him an irritated look.

He turned back and looked at the beast, tilting his head as he considered it. It looked like some sort of wolf hybrid. It had fur the color of charcoal, chunks of it missing in several places. The face was long and elegant, the fur turning even darker at both the face and the tail. Its large, slanted eyes were more demonic than wolflike, the entire eyeball completely black. It had far longer fangs than any wolf he had ever seen, and the sharp claws gave the paws a feline look. Both the long ears and the paws seemed disproportionally large to the rest of the body, but that could be because the creature was unnaturally thin. The hip bones were poking through the dirty fur and he could count every rib, every knob of its spine. It must have been starving long before it got trapped.

He could hear the guards behind him complain about its looks, claiming it was probably disease-ridden and dying, but Luo Binghe thought it was a beautiful animal. Even near skeletal and covered in blood it was still a stunning creature.

It was hard to tell where it was looking with the dark eyes, but as he moved he got the feeling its gaze was on his face.

“I’m going to help you, so don’t bite.” The large ears that had been pinned back swiveled forward as it co*cked its head as he spoke.

It seemed like an intelligent creature, like a lot of Keyou-jun’s experiments had been. Luo Binghe wondered if this wolflike creature had been created before or after Keyou-jun had lost his mind and tried to forcefully turn his servants into demonic creatures.

“Come on sweetheart, it’s not going to hurt.” He slowly reached out towards the trap, giving the wolf time to warn him if he was moving too fast. It merely stared at him, trembling as his hand came closer. As his hand came within biting range he sensed a shift, the wolf suddenly stock still as if holding itself back.

It was a terrified thing, starving and wounded, yet smart enough to not bite even if its instincts told it to lunge at him. He could only imagine how appealing he must seem to a starving wild animal, like a piece of meat waiting to be eaten. Like Shen Qingqiu’s many uneaten meals back at the peak, the ones Luo Binghe had devoured whenever he was tasked with cleaning up after mealtimes.

“Mobei-jun, bring me some food for our friend here. It’s in the left saddlebag.” He kept his eyes on the wolf as he spoke, confident that Mobei-jun would obey. He also wanted to watch the wolf, observing as it zeroed in his horse even before Mobei-jun moved.

It was smart enough to know words, so its mind was most definitely more demon than wolf. That was a good thing, it meant it was less likely to attack and it would be less likely for Luo Binghe to have to fight it.

A piece of chicken came into view and he took it, putting it down just out of reach of the wolf.

“You get it once you’re free, but only if you don’t bite. So be good, alright?” It stared at him without moving, unwilling or unable to respond to his words, but he trusted his gut that it wouldn’t attack.

He leaned forward and pried the trap open using his pure strength and ripped it in two once the wolf was free. The wolf darted forward and bit into the chicken before turning to flee, only managing to take a few steps before its injured leg gave up and crumbled underneath it. With a whimper it went down gracelessly.

The wolf’s shoulders hitched once, twice, before sagging, and when Luo Binghe stood up he could see that its eyes were closed, like it was giving up right in front of him. It didn’t seem right to him that the creature’s life would end right as it got free.

There was a pull low in his chest, like he usually got when something fated was about to be put into play. The need to keep searching for Shen Qingqiu warred within him against the desire to help the injured creature.

Mind made up yet still doubting his decision, he sighed to himself. “Well then, I guess you’re my new guest,” he said as he approached it again.

Carefully he scooped thw wolf up into his arms and grabbed the piece of chicken, ignoring the faint whimpers and the trembling that had started when he touched it. The weight in his arms felt much too light, making it too easy to balance most of the weight on one arm as he unsheathed his sword.

“Keep looking for the prisoner. I’ll return soon,” he said and without waiting for a reply he cut a path back to the castle with Xin Mo.

It seemed like his words were met with trepidation by the creature, causing it to wriggle and whine in his arms as he stepped into his bedroom.

He placed the wolf on the thick rug in front of his fireplace, quickly getting a fire started. The creature looked petrified, scared to the point of almost not breathing as Luo Binghe moved around it, making sure the fire was strong enough to last. It was no wonder it was scared to be back in the castle if it had been subjected to Keyou-jun’s experiments.

With slow, exaggerated movements he sat down next to it, tearing the piece of chicken into small shreds.

“Here sweetheart, eat. I won’t hurt you. You can stay here until you’re better and then you can leave.” He reached out and placed a strip of chicken into the wolf’s mouth, feeling relieved when it swallowed without difficulty.

Slowly he handfed the wolf, letting it eat at its own pace. Once the food was gone, he got up, filling a decorative gold bowl with lukewarm water and topping it off once the wolf had emptied it.

Luo Binghe found his medical supplies and brought them over to the fireplace. With careful movements he reached for the wolf, dangling a piece of bandage in front of it. It barely moved, but a small sigh escaped from its mouth as it resigned itself to being treated. The wolf hardly blinked as he cleaned the wounds and applied the bandages, constantly watching him with its big, black eyes.

It didn’t even flinch as he assessed the injured leg. Not only was the front right leg broken, but it also had a few cuts and bruises, possibly both from the trap and from something else. The ribs seemed tender, earning him a low growl as he touched them, but they seemed to be healing nicely on their own.

He cleaned away the medical supplies and leaned over slowly to pet it, only to be met with a threatening growl, the wolf trembling as it warned him. He heeded the warning, getting up and looking down at the wolf resting next to the fire.

“It seems I lost a prisoner but hopefully gained a friend. Don’t worry though, I don’t think he’s dead. He’s not allowed to die until I let him, and he knows that. I’ll find him. Maybe I’ll feed you his fingers, I’m sure you wouldn’t mind.” The wolf stared at him with wide eyes, watching him as he used Xin Mo to cut a path to where he last left his group.

Shen Qingqiu was out there somewhere, just waiting for Luo Binghe to find him.

Chapter 3: The Void

Chapter Text

The room was warm and his stomach was full, making it hard to stay awake and alert. It was tempting to stay by the fireplace and rest, but he made himself get up. Staying was a bad idea, despite how his leg hurt and his body protested as he limped across the floor.

His mind hadn’t been quite his own when he had escaped the river, influenced by demonic resentment and unfamiliar energy that had affected and shaped the spell he had tried to use. It had been a boon in a way, because by the time he was fully present he was already mostly used to his new body.

It had been his chronic bad luck that had led him straight into the trap. But as he had started contemplating the survival rate of chewing off his leg, fate had laughed and sent Luo Binghe to him. He was back to square one, but at least he didn’t have to put his teeth to his flesh.

With Luo Binghe gone on a fruitless chase to find him, he had the chance to escape. If he managed to leave Luo Binghe would be too busy looking for a human Shen Qingqiu to spare any resources looking for whatever he was now.

He limped forward, each movement threatening to knock him over. His body was weak, each step making his entire body shake in exhaustion, but he was determined. He had to get away before Luo Binghe came back. He had to escape before the beast realized Shen Qingqiu was right in front of him. Before he realized Shen Qingqiu was stuck.

He had tried to change back, but each attempt had been unsuccessful. There was no change, no matter how hard he tried, but he could feel a hint of his body hiding somewhere within. There was no evidence to his assumption, just a strong feeling that his human body was still within reach. But the trouble might also be a blessing in disguise. Clearly Luo Binghe hadn’t noticed who he really was, and it allowed him a chance to escape again.

Shen Qingqiu pawed at the door, but it didn’t budge. He leaned his entire weight on it and still it refused to open. He huffed, clawing at the door in frustration before looking back.

He eyed the doors to the balcony. They seemed too far away, like the distance was unsurmountable, and he had already been reduced to panting and shaking. But there was no other option, and he braced himself with a sigh before limping across the room again.

To his surprise the doors opened, but as he stepped outside he realized why. The snow was high on the balcony, and it was dark outside, but even so he could tell he was far too high up to escape. He made his way through the deep snow to the end of the balcony and stared down. The castle was large, and Luo Binghe had chosen to keep him near the top. There was no way for him to escape as he was now. Perhaps as a human he would have had a chance to climb down, but not now. As cold as it was his fingers would have frozen stiff before he got halfway down, certainly leading to him plummeting to his death.

He looked back inside, the fire bathing it in an enticing golden red color. Even if he couldn’t climb down, he still had the option to jump if Luo Binghe found out who he was. Reluctantly he turned back, making his way back inside. The warmth hit him like a wave, and he pawed at the doors until they were almost closed to keep the warmth from escaping, before he half crawled, half dragged his way back in front of the fireplace and collapsed with a heavy sigh.

Having been outside in the fresh air, he was now conscious that the room smelled like Luo Binghe. It had undertones of other people, but mostly the room smelled smokey and rich, with a woodsy hint to it. With his new sense of smell it was obvious, and it had the potential to be almost overwhelming if he smelled Luo Binghe directly. He would do his best to never be close enough to Luo Binghe to get the chance. Now that he was conscious of it, the scent made his mouth water. He had been fed, but still his body craved more.

Both food and escape were out of the question for the moment. He would have to wait until Luo Binghe returned to be fed and would have to wait until Luo Binghe trusted him enough to not lock him in to escape. In the meantime, he would work on regaining his strength. If he managed to escape before the winter was over this new body seemed surprisingly adept to the cold.

He curled up in front of the fireplace with a heavy sigh, resting his tail over his face. For the moment there was little he could do except rest.

-

Shen Qingqiu stretched his body with a sigh, waking from his nap slowly. The fire was still going strong, and he sighed as he rolled over. It was still dark outside, and Luo Binghe had yet to return. He wondered how long Luo Binghe would look for him before thinking he was dead. Surely the beast realized that a regular human would have died by now.

He stretched again and yawned. His mouth opened wide, then wider and wider. He snapped his mouth shut with a snap. The sensation had felt strange.

He got up on shaky feet, making his way to the closest full-length mirror. It was next to a massive bed, and he tried hard not to think about it. It was the first time he got to see himself, and he recoiled in shock. It should have been obvious that he wasn’t human, and he was already used to using his new body, but his mind still wasn’t prepared for the sight that greeted him.

Staring back at him in the mirror was a creature he had never seen before. Shen Qingqiu had always been proud of his demonic knowledge, but the creature staring back at him was unfamiliar to him. His eyes were completely black, blending in with the color of his fur.

Most disturbingly wasn’t hos body, but the state of his body. He was far too thin, and the lack of fur in places made him look sick. He had seen part of his body when he had first tried to take stock of himself, but he hadn’t been able to see all of it. It was clear to him that how he looked corresponded with his treatment as a prisoner. His hair, his thinness, his various injuries all mostly stemmed from Luo Binghe’s treatment of him.

He turned in the mirror, eyeing his reflection critically. The body was clearly inspired by wolves, except the paws and the eyes. He titled his head, catching the movement in the mirror. With enough food and rest this body would serve him well when he finally escaped.

But he hadn’t used up most of his energy just to admire himself. Locking eyes with himself, he opened his mouth in a fake yawn and watched as his mouth stretched wider and wider, mouth opening impossibly large as it seemed to split his face in two. The inside of his throat had turned into a black void. He slammed his mouth shut with an audible click. Limping one step forward, he studied his face in the mirror. There was no trace of the terrifying gaping maw as he carefully opened his mouth slightly. He slowly opened his mouth wider and caught the moment it went from normal to something definitely not normal. It was an organic transition, a seamless change that changed him from wolf to demon. He shut his mouth again, watching as his face returned to normal once more. It could come in handy in the future, especially if he managed to keep it a secret.

His ears flicked back before he even registered the sound of footsteps approaching the doors, and he hurried over to the fireplace, laying down just as Luo Binghe entered the room.

The look on his face was thunderous, his eyes hard and his mouth set in a displeased dip. The look softened slightly as he saw Shen Qingqiu, and he sighed before crouching close to him.

“How are you feeling, sweetheart? Have you rested?” He reached over, offering his hand to Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Qingqiu tilted his head to the side, eyes not on the hand but on Luo Binghe’s face. He looked tired but determined, an ever-present glint in his eyes that refused to be diminished.

Luo Binghe ran a hand across his face. “Talking to an animal. You’re probably even less of a conversationalist than Walnut.”

He got up, shedding his heavy robes as he approached the bed. Shen Qingqiu watched in alarm. Was this really Luo Binghe’s rooms? Did he sleep here regularly, and was he meant to share a room with him?

Luo Binghe stripped down to his pants and laid down on top of the bed. “They’re all wrong. He’s out there, I know he is. And I will find him.” He turned to look at Shen Qingqiu. “If he’s asleep I will find him. There’s no escape for him.”

Luo Binghe straightened out and closed his eyes. After a moment his breath changed as it slowed down and evened out. Shen Qingqiu waited, watching as Luo Binghe’s chest rose rhythmically. When he was confident Luo Binghe was asleep he made his way to the door. Once again it didn’t budge, refusing to open no matter what he did.

He huffed in frustration, limping over to the side of the bed to study Luo Binghe. What did he mean that he would find him if Shen Qingqiu was asleep? Luo Binghe had kept most of his abilities secret from him, only revealing the ones he needed when he tortured Shen Qingqiu.

He eyed Luo Binghe from his low vantage point. His shoulders were wide, and his torso was muscular and solid. Slowly he inched forward, mouth opening slowly. Could he eat Luo Binghe? If his suspicions were right and he was currently in a body that was at least part void demon, then eating a man should be plausible.

Slowly he rested his head in the bed, mouth still partially opened. He had been right earlier, Luo Binghe smelled woodsy and smokey, and it made his mouth water. If he was right, he should be able to take all of Luo Binghe. It could be his chance to escape

His mouth opened wider, and he could feel saliva drip spill down his jaw. He shuffled closer, driven by an instinct that wasn’t his. Just as he felt his lips split open, Luo Binghe’s fingers twitched on the bed, and he shuffled back as fast as he could.

He shook his head and limped over to the fireplace. He didn’t actually want to eat Luo Binghe, the thought made his stomach curl. And if he was part void demon, he should probably figure out his limit before he tried something so foolish. If he tried and failed, he would be back in Luo Binghe’s bad graces. It was better to wait a little, test his limits before he tried something so distasteful, and only as a last resort. Until then he would be careful to stay awake as Luo Binghe slept, at least until he managed to figure out what Luo Binghe’s sleep abilities were.

He would escape before Luo Binghe found out he was right next to him.

Chapter 4: The Visitor

Chapter Text

Shen Qingqiu stayed by the fireplace, keeping his eyes on Luo Binghe’s sleeping form. The beast’s fingers twitched and curled by his side, probably imagining choking Shen Qingqiu in his dreams.

He yawned, casting his eyes about to find something to entertain himself with. Luo Binghe had said he would find Shen Qingqiu in his dreams, which meant he would have to wait to sleep until Luo Binghe was awake. But his body was tired and his mind was exhausted, each part fighting to drag him down into sleep.

Eyes on his prize, he stretched his good paw out, claws hooking into the sleeve of Luo Binghe’s discarded outer robes. With satisfaction he punctured the sleeve, tearing through the fabric like it was paper. He tested each claw, like he had against a tree back when he had gained control over his new body.

Each claw cut a straight line through the sleeve with deadly efficiency. He tilted his head, dragging the robes closer to him in consideration. Luo Binghe had always been kind to animals, he had seen that firsthand at the Peak. Always hovering around the horses or feeding any stray that came around. Far kinder to any creature than he was to any human, except Ning Yingying.

Back then he had seen the disregard for other people as a character trait similar to his own. Potentially dangerous towards others if kept unchecked. Something he had been told repeatedly by his fellow Peak Lords was a flaw in his own character. A flaw in a human like Shen Qingqiu, but perfectly normal in a demon. How was he supposed to know Luo Binghe was only displaying inherited traits? Of course Luo Binghe’s flaw would turn out to be completely acceptable thanks to his demonic heritage.

He huffed and looked back at the bed, watching Luo Binghe. If he couldn’t sink his claws into the beast, he would vent his frustration in other ways, and use Luo Binghe’s disposition against him.

His claws tore through the other sleeve, creating matching tears through the fabric. If Luo Binghe didn’t wake up soon and let him rest he would wake up to nothing but scraps. The smokey scent of Luo Binghe thickened as he clawed the robes closer, and he was about to bite down on them when his ears flicked forward.

For some reason his attention was drawn to the doors, and he turned his head towards them. There was no sound coming from hallway outside, but an unnamed instinct told him something was wrong.

He limped over to stand next to the doors, crouching down and hiding in the shadows while listened intently. There was still no sound, but he knew something was approaching. His lips curled up on their own accord, his hackles raising as whatever it was came closer. His ears tilted further forward as a deep rumble instinctively started from somewhere deep within him.

There was movement from the bed, but his attention was on the entrance. As it opened he lunged, teeth tearing through heavy fabric and sinking into flesh as he made contact with the intruder.

A shriek and a shout rang out simultaneously before a palm connected to his head and sent him flying. He landed on his side, the pain from his injuries hardly registering as he readied himself to attack again.

“Enough!” Luo Binghe gestured at him, having already gotten to the intruder’s side.

But instead of subduing the intruder, he was leading her to sit. It felt wrong having a clear interloper in what he came to realize with horror, he already considered his space.

“Let me see,” he told her, and carefully lifted the ends of her dress to reveal her injured leg. He held it in his hands carefully, examining the punctures.

She cried out in pain, casting an angry glare at Shen Qingqiu over Luo Binghe’s head. Shen Qingqiu caught a glimpse of the injury, huffing in disappointment. It barely scratched her skin. If, in the future, he needed to defend himself in his new body he would have to learn how to use his advantages better.

“You’re so bored of your wives you’ve gotten a dog just to chase us away?” She sniffed, a pout forming at her lips when Luo Binghe looked up at her.

Now that he knew she wasn’t a threat, Shen Qingqiu limped back to the fireplace to stay out of trouble and take stock of the intruder.

She was a beautiful woman, with high cheekbones and a graceful arch to her eyebrows. Her long, pulled back hair was dark as the night, and her skin paler than even Shen Qingqiu’s had been when he escaped, but without the unhealthy tint to it. Even from his where he was sitting he could tell her eyes were a beautiful dark green. There was an inborn arrogance to her, present in the naturally regal way she sat with Luo Binghe kneeling at her feet.

Shen Qingqiu had the irrational thought that he should have eaten her when he had the chance.

“How could I get bored of my princess, my dancing star, my Shi Xingwu? There, is that better?” Luo Binghe leaned down and kissed her now unblemished leg.

“Better, thank you. Still, why have you taken in a diseased mutt?” She arched one elegant eyebrow, directing a doubtful stare at Shen Qingqiu.

“He’s not diseased, just injured. Just wait until he’s better, he’s going to be beautiful.” Luo Binghe turned his head to level a smile at him, and Shen Qingqiu turned away to gaze at the fireplace.

“Why did you come sneaking to my room so early in the morning? You know you can always call on me and I will come visit you.” A tinge of irritation appeared in Luo Binghe’s voice. His companion didn’t seem to hear it, but Shen Qingqiu had spent the last year learning the subtle signs that appeared when Luo Binghe was trying to hide his emotions.

“How boring. A princess goes wherever she wants.” Shen Qingqiu turned at that, interested in how Luo Binghe would handle such boldness.

“True. But I was in the middle of something.” The faint tone of irritation turned deeper, yet she still didn’t seem to catch it.

He was still on his knees in front of her, hands still holding her leg gently. Shen Qingqiu hadn’t ever entertained the thought that Luo Binghe would ever willingly be on his knees for anyone.

“Something more important than me?” Her tone was playful, her foot skating across Luo Binghe’s thigh teasingly. He shifted minutely, widening his stance.

There was something in her behavior that seemed off to Shen Qingqiu, like everything else about her did. He really should have eaten her when he had the chance.

“You know how it is. My campaign won’t win itself.” Luo Binghe’s hands slowly stroked up her leg to her thigh, reaching indecently far up her dress. The movement made the strong muscles of his back stand out even more.

“About that. You’re meeting my father soon to discuss the future of our Hold. Have you made a decision?” Her foot crept closer to the center of Luo Binghe, and Shen Qingqiu turned away in mortification.

He closed his eyes and said a little prayer. To any god listening, please don’t let them go further! If he had to be in the same room as Luo Binghe when he took someone to bed, he would rather be back in the snow, chewing his own leg off.

“I have.” Luo Binghe said, hands thankfully going back down as Shen Qingqiu opened his eyes again.

“And?” Shi Xingwu’s voice held a hint of impatience, hidden beneath a layer of cloying sweetness.

“Of course my new wife will be appointed as the Hold’s new ruler. She will serve me well,” Luo Binghe said, his big hand encircling her ankle.

“Of course I will,” she replied, lips stretching into a wide smile. “Well then. I’ll leave you to your important business.”

Luo Binghe pulled her down for a kiss that turned filthy before Shen Qingqiu had the chance to turn away again.

“I will see you soon,” she said and stepped out of his grip. She made her way out without a backwards glance, closing the door behind her.

With an undignified snort Luo Binghe turned towards Shen Qingqiu. He crawled over, not bothering to get up for the short distance between them. The movement made him seem like a predator that was more at home in the wilds than in his room. The fire turned his skin golden, like he had been dipped in sunlight. It reminded Shen Qingqiu of how different they were. It reminded him off how sickly pale he had been in that little cell.

Shen Qingqiu was very much aware that Luo Binghe was still only in his pants, which were indecently tented. Luo Binghe’s scent had deepened, turning more earthy, and with mortification he realized he now knew what Luo Binghe smelled like when he was aroused. He spared a moment to curse his heightened senses just as Luo Binghe reached out a hand towards him.

“Be glad you don’t have to deal with being married, sweetheart. I have hundreds of wives, all of them scheming. Either they’re planning to use me or go against me, sometimes even both.” Luo Binghe let his hand hover in front of Shen Qingqiu, a pleased smile appearing when Shen Qingqiu didn’t growl or shrink back.

“Though, perhaps not all of them. I do have some wives who just want to live in peace.” He withdrew his hand, deciding not to push his luck.

Luo Binghe got up and picked up his robes. Shen Qingqiu looked away as he got dressed, staring at the fire. What did he care about Luo Binghe’s wives, as long as they didn’t try anything with him still in the room!

There was a beat of silence, and then a low-pitched laugh filled the room. Curious, he turned his head, catching Luo Binghe toying with his sleeves.

A soft sort of smile formed on Luo Binghe’s lips. “Are you already bored? Or were you looking for attention?”

Shen Qingqiu huffed and sighed in reply, turning away again. Attention? He wanted to rest! He definitely didn’t want attention from Luo Binghe of all people!

“I’ll be right back with something for you to eat, and with new bandages,” Luo Binghe said before heading for the door. Shen Qingqiu’s stomach chose that moment to growl loudly, filling him with mortification when Luo Binghe laughed again.

Did he act this freely around everyone? Shen Qingqiu had little experience with the adult Luo Binghe outside of the time they spent together in his cell, but he had never behaved so carefree around him. Was he so generous with himself around others all of the time, or was it because this room was the only place he could be himself, and Shen Qingqiu got to see it because he was stuck there with him?

The Luo Binghe he had seen now, on his knees before someone else, waiting for something that never came, that was a Luo Binghe he had never seen before. Or perhaps he had seen a hint of him, when Luo Binghe was a disciple, too young and inexperienced to know what he wanted. Shen Qingqiu, too old and too experienced, overcompensating with cruelty in fear of being seen as encouraging such behavior. He found it best to not dwell on such thoughts.

To the rest of the world, the Luo Binghe that had returned from the Endless Abyss was a man made up of charm, ambition, and earnestness. No one else had seemed to see that Luo Binghe was made of tightly coiled emotions tempered and beaten down, that the earnestness was merely a disguise for his ruthlessness. That Luo Binghe was made of anger and despair that had turned into cruelty.

But there was no cruelty in the Luo Binghe who came back with several bowls and what looked like a year’s supply of bandages, all of which he placed just out of reach from Shen Qingqiu. One of the bowls was filled to the brim with delicious smelling chicken, the scent making his mouth water. It took all his self-restraint to overcome the natural instinct to lunge for the food. As a disciple he had developed an iron will to combat the desperation around food he had gained in his childhood. He refused to let that iron will crumble at the hands of Luo Binghe.

“First the bandages, then the food. Is that a good deal, sweetheart?” Luo Binghe looked at him like he was expecting a reply, so he huffed and stayed still. He might as well continue to play nice with Luo Binghe, until he had the chance to act.

It was all the invitation Luo Binghe needed to reach over and take his injured leg into his hand, unwrapping the bandages with deft handling. Luo Binghe leaned over to inspect the injury, bringing the beast too close for comfort to Shen Qingqiu.

His pulse picked up, beating an irregular rhythm in his throat. He was safe. Luo Binghe didn’t know who he was. The reassuring thoughts did little to calm his racing heart. With gentle hands Luo Binghe dabbed a wet cloth against the worst of the wounds, a touch unlike any he had ever given Shen Qingqiu. It made him want to bite Luo Binghe’s hands off. The thought made him stiffen, and Luo Binghe let go off him.

“I’m not going to hurt you, sweetheart. I’m just here to help.” Luo Binghe watched him, and only once his posture relaxed did Luo Binghe reach for him again.

“Good. Very good. See, we’ll be friends in no time!” Luo Binghe said so cheerfully Shen Qingqiu had to fight not to roll his eyes at him. His leg was quickly wrapped in a poultice that smelled like ginger and cloves. He would have to figure out just what was in it, as it offered instant relief from the pain.

“Now, I’m going to splint your leg, so you should try not to stand too much on it. I was worried Shi Xingwu made it worse when she knocked you down, but luckily it doesn’t look too bad.” He splinted the leg with ease, hushing Shen Qingqiu when he grumbled.

“Now then,” Luo Binghe started as he looked Shen Qingqiu over. “I appreciate you defending me, but please don’t go around biting my wives. Some of them love to hold grudges. I’m still not sure about Shi Xingwu,” he hesitated as his eyes narrowed in thought.

“I won’t let anyone hurt you, but it’s probably for the best if you don’t bite anyone.” Luo Binghe put poultice on some of his other injuries, bringing him relief all over.

“Now then,” Luo Binghe said and reached for the bowl full of chicken. “Here’s your food, as promised.”

Luo Binghe held out a strip of chicken in his hand, waiting for Shen Qingqiu to take it. He remembered eating out of Luo Binghe’s hand before, too weak and hungry to think twice about it. But now, now he couldn’t help but eye the hand with distrust.

Logically he knew that as long as Luo Binghe didn’t know who he was, then he would be fine. But the only times his face had been so close to Luo Binghe’s hands in the past, it had promised him nothing but pain.

Luo Binghe had been the one who held him down and made him feel like his entire body was on fire. Luo Binghe had personally broken his golden core with the very hands that now offered to feed him.

“You don’t want it?” Luo Binghe asked, waving the chicken in his face. “No? Oh well, waste not, want not,” the wretched beast said and tore into the chicken, easily devouring the strip.

Some part of his mind that now wasn’t entirely human wanted to lunge at Luo Binghe. Wanted to go for his throat and eliminate the threat to his food supply. His muscles tightened in anticipation against his will, ready to launch him forward in a deadly attack. But then Luo Binghe laughed and reached into the bowl to offer him another piece of chicken.

“So, you do want it. Then take it, come on,” Luo Binghe coaxed, chicken now dangling right in front of Shen Qingqiu’s nose.

Embarrassment crept upon him as he ate the food out of Luo Binghe’s hands, thankful that his new form couldn’t blush.

“That’s a good boy,” Luo Binghe praised.

Another piece was offered, and he took it with less hesitation, deciding not to react to Luo Binghe shuffling closer.

“Beautiful, brilliant boy,” Luo Binghe said, and if Shen Qingqiu had been in his own body he would have spontaneously combusted at the mortification of being cooed over. The praise Luo Binghe heaped upon him just for eating was something Shen Qingqiu had never heard directed at him before. Who praised someone for eating?

“You’re a hungry little thing, aren’t you?” Luo Binghe said as Shen Qingqiu shifted to get closer to the offered food.

“But you’re going to be big and strong one day, I know it,” Luo Binghe said, one hand now resting next to Shen Qingqiu’s shoulders. Beast, have some mercy on your enemy and shut up!

Shen Qingqiu did his best to block out the inane flattery, focusing on the food until there was nothing left. There was a movement at the corner of his eye and it took him a moment to realize it was Luo Binghe’s hand closing in on him. Blind panic flooded his veins and he he struck, sinking his teeth into Luo Binghe’s arm. Luo Binghe’s shout rang in his ears, and in the blink of an eye he let go, dread filling him over what he had done. He scrambled away to the balcony doors, putting distance between them.

He had his back to the balcony, and if Luo Binghe came for him he would throw himself right off it. He was panting, ears pinned back and teeth on display.

“Sweetheart, that wasn’t wise.” Luo Binghe stared at him, seemingly uncaring about blood pooling down his arm and dripping onto the floor.

Shen Qingqiu growled at him, warning him. Luo Binghe stayed on his knees, hands spread out in a show of openness.

“I mean it. If you ingested my blood it might not be good for you. I’ve tried it before, but demonic creatures seem to react badly to it. How do you feel?” Luo Binghe felt worried about him?

Shen Qingqiu kept his eyes on Luo Binghe as he took an inward check. He felt fine, there didn’t seem to be any sudden adverse reaction happening. Perhaps he didn’t ingest any of Luo Binghe’s blood.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have tried to touch you. It won’t happen again,” Luo Binghe said.

Shen Qingqiu stared at Luo Binghe, trying to gauge his honesty. His mouth had turned downwards in an unhappy tilt, his brow furrowed.

Luo Binghe sighed and got up, bitemarks already closing. “I have to leave again, but I’m not mad at you. I have to go out and search some more since I didn’t find him.”

Luo Binghe pushed the bowl with the remaining chicken closer to him. “Rest some more, sweetheart. I’ll be back later.”

With that he left, leaving Shen Qingqiu to his own thoughts. He had bitten Luo Binghe and hadn’t gotten punished for it. Had drawn blood, and all he got was a worried frown and chastisem*nt because he could have gotten injured. There had been none of the irritation that Luo Binghe had shown his wife for just going to his rooms.

He limped over to the fire again, letting sleep take him now that Luo Binghe was awake. He was safe, for now.

Chapter 5: The First Meeting

Chapter Text

The dreams he experienced in his new form were different than before the transformation. To his chagrin as an adult his dreams were often remnants of his past, haunting him upon waking to the point he would rather not sleep at all.

In his new form, his dreams had changed. He went from prey to predator. From hunted to hunter. He ran free, weaving through the trees, finally running like the wind because he wanted to and not because something was chasing him.

He was busy chasing leaves dancing on the wind when the scenery suddenly changed, and so did he, something other that had been lurking within his mind since he transformed changing him back to his human form before he even knew it was happening. One moment he was running on all fours and then suddenly he was walking on two feet among the bamboo forest behind his home. One moment he was healthy, in the next moment the pain from his arm shocked the breath from his lungs.

There could be only one reason for this change and he twirled around, looking deep into the forest, searching for the monster he knew was hiding out there.

“There’s no escape,” a voice said behind him, but when he turned there was no one there.

“You’ll never get away,” it said behind him again, and he turned again, taking a step back.

“I’ll always find you,” Luo Binghe said, smugness evident in his voice as Shen Qingqiu’s back collided with a solid form.

His breath caught in his throat as terror filled him, and only his determination kept him from shaking like a leaf. For a moment he entertained the notion that if he never turned to look then Luo Binghe wouldn’t exist in that moment, in that time.

He turned and stepped back, but not before his left wrist was captured, Luo Binghe’s long fingers clamping around it like a manacle. Luo Binghe felt like a furnace against his cold skin, and he realized he was naked in front of the other man.

A fear long-ago instilled in him flashed through him before his mind rejected it. Luo Binghe liked to hurt him, liked to give him pain, but he had never gone that far. Had never shown any interest in wanting to hurt him like that.

There was no yield to the grip as he tugged on his hand, a scowl forming on his face that he couldn’t hide as he took in Luo Binghe’s arrogant smile.

The beast looked him up and down, tutting at what he saw. “You look terrible, Shen Qingqiu. It looks like freedom doesn’t suit you at all.”

“Don’t belittle your influence, Luo Binghe. Almost all of this is your doing,” he replied with a sneer, refusing to feel self-conscious in front of his captor.

Luo Binghe’s eyes dipped, and his stare lingered on Shen Qingqiu’s torso, hovering over the bruises on his jutting ribs and hip. Probably admiring the additions to his work, Shen Qingqiu thought.

“Tell me where you are,” Luo Binghe compelled, fingers twitching around his wrist like he longed to shatter it in his grip.

“f*ck you,” Shen Qingqiu said, and if his right arm hadn’t been broken he would have taken a swipe at Luo Binghe’s face.

Instead, Luo Binghe’s face twisted into a snarl as the grip on his wrist turned harsh, pain erupting as he felt his bones grind together. Shen Qingqiu kicked out, but his leg was easily caught by Luo Binghe’s free hand before his other leg was swept and he fell, falling on his back into the dirt.

Luo Binghe followed him down, his solid weight pressing him into the ground, and even though he was sure Luo Binghe would never rape him, his mind still went blank with panic.

He had never been naked in front of Luo Binghe, even when he was forced to change into disciple robes Luo Binghe had raised one sardonic eyebrow before giving a mocking little bow and turning to give him privacy.

There was no stopping the panic, nor the way his body trashed underneath Luo Binghe. He no longer cared about his injured arm as he hit the other man until Luo Binghe captured both his hands and pulled them over his head.

A sharp, terrified whimper left his lips before he could contain it while he struggled with his whole body to get away from the Luo Binghe. The weight holding him down stilled its movements, and Luo Binghe stared down at him, cold eyes assessing him.

“What has the untouchable Shen Qingqiu so worked up? You’ve never shown how afraid you are before.” Luo Binghe stared at him like he was a whole new person and he felt like he had betrayed himself. Now that Luo Binghe had seen this reaction he would surely search for ways to bring it out of him if he ever found him again. A year of refusing to show fear at Luo Binghe’s hands had been for nothing.

Luo Binghe blinked, a line forming between his brows as his terrifyingly sharp, stupid, cunning mind connected the dots. A look of disgust formed on his face, a sneer twisting his lips.

“I have no interest in taking you against your will, Shen Qingqiu.” And with that he was suddenly dressed again, once more covered in the filthy disciple robes he had lost during his escape.

“After all, I’m not you,” Luo Binghe said, a note of something unfamiliar in his voice.

Shen Qingqiu gritted his teeth, fighting the primitive urge to just lean up and bite at any part of Luo Binghe he could reach. Whatever had aided his transformation had left a lingering stain on his self-control.

“I’ve never! I’ve never done that!” Shen Qingqiu hissed at Luo Binghe, affronted by the continuous accusations. On and on Luo Binghe would accuse him of being lecherous and perverted, and never did he believe Shen Qingqiu when he denied it.

Luo Binghe sighed like he was disappointed in him. “It doesn’t matter what you say. Now, tell me where you are.”

“I’d rather die!” He twisted in Luo Binghe’s grip, trying to get leverage to push him off, watching as Luo Binghe’s face filled with anger.

“You know what the best thing about dreams are, Shen Qingqiu? Nothing you do here is permanent.” With that ominous statement Luo Binghe wrenched his left arm down before pulling hard on it. To his horror Shen Qingqiu felt his other hand immobilized by roots that suddenly weaved around his wrist, keeping him from striking Luo Binghe.

Luo Binghe pulled on his arm, and he could feel the joints threatening to dislocate, unimaginable pain spreading throughout his body as his arm was slowly ripped from the rest of his body. Shen Qingqiu twisted as hard as he could, kicking out in desperation to get away from the pain to no avail.

With an audible tearing sound and a horrible ripping sensation his arm came loose, the pain so excruciating it would have made him pass out if he was awake. But in this dream realm he was forced to endure it, forced to stay awake for every excruciating moment.

Luo Binghe ripped the arm out from his sleeve, staring at it with detached satisfaction before placing it back down over the now empty sleeve. Shen Qingqiu stared up at him through narrowed eyes, fighting to keep the tears in his eyes from spilling.

Luo Binghe cooed down at him, his tone a mockery of how he had just spoken to him when they were awake. “Don’t cry, Shen Qingqiu. Only three more to go,” he said and let a smile stretch across his lips.

Terror filled Shen Qingqiu. Three more? Did he intend on taking his legs as well as his arms?

“But I’ll stop if you tell me where you are.” Luo Binghe cajoled, leaning up to wrap one hand around his captured wrist.

Every fiber of his body told him to surrender. Told him that if he had to endure the pain three more times he would go insane. But he already knew that this was not a punishment Luo Binghe had just thought of. It had been evident when he had kissed Shen Qingqiu’s palm before he had left. It was always going to come to this and giving up now would only mean hastening when the punishment would happen in the real world.

“Go to hell,” he spat at Luo Binghe, and watched as his smile turned sweet like Shen Qingqiu had just agreed with him.

Luo Binghe tugged his other hand down, and the pain was already much worse from the arm already being broken. As Luo Binghe pulled, the broken bones parted with a sickening feeling that threatened to make him vomit. He twisted in the grip once more, feet kicking in every direction in pure desperation.

And he awoke with a yelp, heartbeat thundering in his ears. He had a moment to get on his legs before he vomited, undevoured pieces of chicken splattering across the floor.

When the initial terror had simmered down he became aware of a stinging pain in his back leg. Limping away from the mess he had made he lied down, curling over to inspect his leg. A blister had formed on the big pad, the long hairs between his toes singed short. He must have kicked out during the dream and managed to put his leg into the fire, allowing the pain to awaken him.

It had been a nightmare, but he knew it had been real. Not for the first time, the truth of Luo Binghe’s powers filled him with dread.

He would have to make sure he never fell asleep unless he knew for sure Luo Binghe would be awake. At that, he looked outside, surprised at how much time he had spent sleeping. His body was still recovering, so it should have been no surprise that it needed sleep, but it was still disconcerting to lose so much time.

The doors to the room were opened silently, and Luo Binghe tiptoed in before he saw Shen Qingqiu sitting there, frozen in fear, and then his carefulness disappeared. His face was pinched, his mouth flat and his brows squeezed together, but at the sight of the mess on the floor his expression mellowed, his eyes going to Shen Qingqiu with concern. Shen Qingqiu struggled to not shrink back in fear, worried that Luo Binghe would somehow know who he was.

“Was it too much food all at once, sweetheart?” Luo Binghe turned and left, reappearing armed with cleaning supplies. He knelt down, carefully cleaning up the mess without complaint, face turning placid as he worked.

Once he was done and the mess had been removed he returned to the room again, shoulders falling as he sat down on the floor with his back against the bed. Shen Qingqiu watched him warily, ready to run if Luo Binghe came closer.

“I’m sorry. I should have known you were going to be sick. Especially since I’ve been there myself. The first time I ate after I left the Endless Abyss I ate so much I vomited. Then I went right back and ate too much again, making myself sick a second time before I learned.” Luo Binghe shook his head, a throaty chuckle marking his self-deprecating thoughts.

Shen Qingqiu could relate. He too had known what it was to feel hunger and not know that too much food was a bad thing. Unlike Luo Binghe it had taken him more than two times to stop himself from overeating.

Luo Binghe shifted and stretched out, crawling across the floor until he was in front of the fire and then he lied down to face it. His fingers plucked restlessly at the stone around the fireplace as he huffed in annoyance.

“I had him! He was right there! How did he manage to escape?” He turned onto his other side, looking at Shen Qingqiu. “Can you please tell me, sweetheart? How did he escape?”

He looked at Shen Qingqiu like he held all the answers, his widened eyes and downturned lips making him look like an unhappy child. Luo Binghe had never looked unhappy in his presence before. Sure, he had looked miserable during some of his harsher punishments, but even then his face had looked eerily calm, enduring whatever Shen Qingqiu had thrown at him.

Shen Qingqiu struggled to act casual, heart still beating too fast at being in the same room as Luo Binghe so soon after his dream. He shifted where he rested, his newly injured leg scraping against the floor and making him turn his head towards the pain, his leg twitching up by its own accord.

Luo Binghe made a questioning sound, a frown forming on his face. “What’s wrong?” His hands reached for Shen Qingqiu, who froze. “I’m not going to hurt you. Can I see?”

Slowly, Luo Binghe got up and crawled over, kneeling in front of Shen Qingqiu’s hind legs. After studying his injury without touching him he reached into a pouch on his belt and retrieved a small vial and a bandage.

Luo Binghe turned to look at him, a soft smile on his lips. “I’ll have to touch your leg to help you,” he warned.

Shen Qingqiu could feel his heartbeat pick up, his pulse starting to pound in his ears. As Luo Binghe reached towards him he held himself completely still, hardly daring to breathe.

Gentler than Shen Qingqiu thought possible Luo Binghe swiftly applied the ointment before wrapping his leg in a neat bandage, and the moment he was done he let go of Shen Qingqiu’s leg and crawled back towards the fireplace.

Luo Binghe shook his head ruefully. “I’m a terrible host. You get hit by my wife, overfed by me, and then burned by the fire. Not to worry, I’ll take better care of you from now on.”

Luo Binghe looked far too chipper for someone who had just been upset, and it could hardly mean good news for him. He curled up into a ball, resting his head on his tail and looked at Luo Binghe, hoping it would prompt him into revealing his thoughts.

Sitting up, Luo Binghe shed his outer robe and rested his back on the warm stones next to the fireplace. He straightened one red sleeve before ruffling it, deep in thought.

“He’s not dead. That means he’s not still out there in the snow, or else he would have frozen to death long ago.” He rummaged through another pouch, pulling out an old worn map he unfolded before pointing at it. Shen Qingqiu looked at it, doing his best to not appear to be too intelligent for an unknown demon-creature.

“We’re here. And my reach is roughly this,” Luo Binghe said and pointed, making a wide circle around almost half of the map. Did Luo Binghe mean his dream powers could reach that far? The thought was terrifying.

“And these parts are just ice,” he continued, pointing at various spots. “These parts are too steep. This will just be icy sludge by now. This half is in the opposite direction of where he was. But here and here, and possibly these two spots could be where he’s hiding.” Luo Binghe’s finger pointed rapidly across the map, and Shen Qingqiu noted them all in case he needed the information in the future.

It was almost enough to fill him with glee, sitting right next to an optimistic Luo Binghe who didn’t even know Shen Qingqiu was in his bedroom. It made him feel better than he had since the whelp had returned from the hole he had kicked him into. Now, if he only managed to actually escape he could probably survive on the pure satisfaction alone for the rest of his life.

“I’ve already sent people to look for him. I’d do it myself, but unfortunately I have an important meeting.” His voice took on an annoyed tone as he ruffled his hair. He stretched his legs where he sat, twirling one foot in a semicircle.

“Maybe it won’t be so bad. She’s very beautiful after all,” Luo Binghe said slyly, giving Shen Qingqiu a smile.

Luo Binghe talked a lot for someone who was not in the presence of someone who could talk back. It was usually a sign of someone insane or lonely, and with how many wives Luo Binghe had it was definitely not the latter. Shen Qingqiu huffed to himself, he always knew Luo Binghe had issues.

Luo Binghe looked at him, his smile crooked and genuine. “Are you doubting me? You’ve already seen her, but it might have been too stressful for you to get a proper look at her. Maybe I’ll bring her back here so you can see for yourself.” He gestured with his hand and chided him teasingly. “But you can’t bite her. No biting unless absolutely necessary.”

Shen Qingqiu definitely wouldn’t randomly bite someone, but if Luo Binghe continued to be annoying he would have to reconsider not eating him. A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts of devouring Luo Binghe, and Luo Binghe moved to his desk before a small group of common demons entered.

“We’re here to set up your bath, Junshang,” one short demon said, bowing before the group entered the room completely.

Shen Qingqiu wanted to roll his eyes at the title. Junshang. The worst part was the title was probably deserved. Luo Binghe wasn’t just some common little demon, but a powerful Heavenly Demon, and from the gloating he had done while torturing Shen Qingqiu, he was a successful conqueror of most of the Demon Realm. His reign was continuously expanding, conquering everything he set his sight on.

Luo Binghe waved the servants in without a word and they got to work, lifting a bronze tub that had been hidden behind a screen at the back of the room and carrying it to the fireplace before filling it with warm water.

They all stared at Shen Qingqiu warily, walking around him in a wide circle. All but the one who had spoken, who first eyed him cautiously before giving him a nod and promptly ignoring him.

Once the tub was filled and the scent of lavender filled the room, all but the speaker hurried out, bowing on their way. Luo Binghe got up with a heavy sigh, stretching out before removing his clothes. He was looking in Shen Qingqiu’s direction, if not directly at him, and Shen Qingqiu hesitated to look away. Would averting his gaze be too much of a tell? Would it reveal that he was neither a demon nor a creature?

He rested his head on his paw, trying to appear casual about the increasingly amount of skin revealed. Luo Binghe dropped his clothing to the floor piece by piece, not caring where it ended up. His red robe fell long before he got to the tub, and he toed off his shoes and socks as he walked over. His upper undergarment was tugged open, and it slipped off his shoulders as he undid his pants, letting the remaining clothes fall to the floor as he stopped almost right in front of Shen Qingqiu and peered down at him.

Shen Qingqiu did his best to look straight ahead, staring at Luo Binghe’s ankles and not peering up as the lesser demon picked up the garments and scurried out of the room.

“Perhaps you should bathe afterwards. How about it, sweetheart?” Luo Binghe said with a laugh. “Maybe once you’re better.”

The laughter caught his attention and he looked up, regretting it immediately. Really, wasn’t it too much? Luckily Luo Binghe turned to put one hand in the water to test the temperature, unaware of Shen Qingqiu’s eyes widening into perfect circles. How could Luo Binghe’s wives handle him?

It seemed everything about Luo Binghe was larger than average. From his wide shoulders to his big hands to his thick thighs, and now Shen Qingqiu was cursed with the knowledge that Luo Binghe was equipped with something that had no right to enter someone’s body!

A happy sigh left Luo Binghe as he climbed into the bath, and he settled in and relaxed with a groan. Silence filled the air between them and Shen Qingqiu could finally look away, filled with dismay over his fate.

The only noises were the crackling of the fire and the water sloshing around as Luo Binghe cleaned himself. Shen Qingqiu was close enough to the tub to be lulled by the heat radiating from it, and he could feel sleep tugging at him already, his body still needing rest to recover. Maybe if he napped now he would wake up as Luo Binghe left for his meeting, allowing him to gather his thoughts and make a plan in peace.

He closed his eyes, letting the waves of sleep crash over him in time with the sounds of Luo Binghe’s movements. He was almost asleep when he heard loud movement from above, and he opened his eyes to see Luo Binghe peering down from the lip of his tub. His head was resting on his arms on the edge of the tub, fat drops of water falling from his fingertips and landing only a knife’s edge from Shen Qingqiu.

“Once I find him I was thinking of taking us all to the Southern Kingdom. I’m sure you’ll recover faster away from the cold.” Luo Binghe’s wet hair was clinging to his face and his shoulders and already starting to curl, highlighting the boyishness he had yet to outgrow.

“Up until the Endless Abyss I-,” Luo Binghe lifted his hand, seemingly focused on how the water ran down to his elbow. “I was always cold. The only good thing about the Abyss was the warmth. And Xin Mo, I suppose.” He laughed a little, submerging his hand in the water. Xin Mo, the infernal sword Shen Qingqiu had been defeated with when Luo Binghe challenged him.

He sounded relaxed and a little hesitant as he spoke, and Shen Qingqiu wondered if Luo Binghe had a need to talk to someone. Maybe he had no one he could talk to so casually, and that was why he was unburdening himself on a creature that could only listen. But he had often boasted about the number of wives he was accumulating, and anyone with that many wives surely had enough of people to talk to?

“The warmth will do us all some good,” he said, nodding to himself as he got up. He dried his hair before getting out of the tub, and Shen Qingqiu watched as drops of water raced down his pale back, his gaze and the drops hesitating at the swell of his ass before carrying on down his thighs.

It felt as if his gums were itching, like his teeth were aching to sink into Luo Binghe’s skin and tear him apart. It didn’t disappear until Luo Binghe was fully dressed, this time in robes without tears in the sleeves. His feet was bare as he walked around in his room, tugging a comb haphazardly through his hair, and it somehow made his seem more vulnerable than when he was naked in front of him. Shen Qingqiu suppressed a wince as the comb got caught at the back of his head and Luo Binghe just forced it through the knot. How could someone who looked like Luo Binghe, who wore his robes a little too loose around the chest and often went without an inner robe, just seemingly not care about his hair? Shen Qingqiu had often admonished him for it, and sometimes even punished him for it, and still Luo Binghe didn’t care about his hair.

There must have been something judgmental showing on his face because Luo Binghe stopped and looked at him. “Once your fur has grown in we’ll see how much you enjoy being brushed,” Luo Binghe said, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

Luo Binghe pulled on his socks and his shoes, completing his black attire. “I’ll be back later, depending on how long the meeting goes.” He looked down at Shen Qingqiu and his hand twitched at his side before reaching for a bowl and a pitcher.

“I’ll bring some food later and this time we’ll take it slow. See you later, sweetheart,” Luo Binghe said and put down a bowl of fresh water. The scent of lavender wafted from his clean skin, cloying in Shen Qingqiu’s sensitive nose and lingering after he was gone.

Shen Qingqiu was left behind with nothing to do but sleep, and the thought terrified him. Would Luo Binghe find him again if he dared to sleep?

Chapter 6: Closing the Distance

Chapter Text

Sleep tugged at him, aided by the warmth from the dying fire that tried to lull him into closing his eyes and drifting away. Luo Binghe had been gone for a while and now he felt as if it would be too dangerous to sleep. In any moment Luo Binghe could be asleep somewhere, as he clearly didn’t sleep only in this room. He needed to find a way to get enough sleep without Luo Binghe catching him in his dreams, and without Luo Binghe connecting the dots between when he as a creature slept and when Luo Binghe would encounter Shen Qingqiu as a human.

He had spent so much time in his cell trying to get enough sleep, hindered by the warmth and the humidity and the bugs during the summer, and the cold and the pain during the winter. During the last months he had only managed to sleep once his shivering had exhausted all his energy. And now he was fighting to stay awake, tempted by the relative comfort he found himself in.

He got up on shaky legs, limping over to the balcony doors and nosing them open wide enough to pass through. It was difficult to tell through the snowstorm that had picked up again, but it was sometime near dawn, rays of sunlight peeking through the heavy snow.

The cold hit him the moment he ventured outside, chilling him to the core and dispelling any lingering warmth on his bare skin. His fur still held on to the warmth as much as it could, but the places where he was missing fur were vulnerable territory the cold immediately conquered.

The cold stung his eyes and his nose, becoming little pinpricks of pain in his lungs when he inhaled. It shook him awake, dispelling the lingering traces of sleep that had threatened to bring him into the dangerous territory of dreaming.

He needed to get Luo Binghe to let him leave the room. There was no way he could stay awake and out of Luo Binghe’s reach for as long as it took for him to heal, though it seemed as if his body healed quicker in this form than he expected. Either that, or Luo Binghe’s medical attention actually worked.

He remembered the animals at the Peak that followed Luo Binghe around. How the boy had been weak to begging eyes, sneaking off and sharing his food with anything that looked like it needed it. He had seen Luo Binghe tear strips off his inner robe to bandage cats and dogs and feed them more than he should as a growing boy. Had seen it and scoffed to himself but had returned with more food whenever Luo Binghe wasn’t around so the animals wouldn’t starve the boy to death. Had made sure to make up a reason to inspect his disciple’s robes and had punished Luo Binghe for the state of his attire, but he had also given Ning Yingying the task of giving him new ones on the sake of propriety. As much as he was cruel to Luo Binghe, he didn’t need the boy dying under his care or shaming on his Peak by looking like a beggar.

Luo Binghe had always been too soft for the ones that needed him, both animals and the women. He had seen it firsthand, they all had, during the Immortal Alliance Conference when Luo Binghe had helped that Huan Hua Palace disciple without hesitation once she given him a pleading look, and then he had helped-helped her. Unfortunately, that special help had been displayed on the crystal screens until the staff had diverted the spirit eagle that caught the moment. It had been embarrassing at the time, having his disciple so openly flaunting his disregard for property, but it solidified what Shen Qingqiu already knew. Luo Binghe hardly cared for other people, but he enjoyed being needed, being wanted.

Shen Qingqiu wasn’t a woman, and even if he was, Luo Binghe’s hatred wouldn’t have let him show kindness towards Shen Qingqiu. But he was currently an animal of sorts and even if it pained him to admit it, he was currently pitiful.

Maybe he could use it to his advantage. If he acted more like an animal companion, he could stick close by Luo Binghe and get a better idea of when it would be safe to rest. And it would be easier to escape once he was feeling better if Luo Binghe felt comfortable letting him roam the castle by himself.

The wind howled around him, but he still caught the moment Luo Binghe entered the room. His footsteps were soft as he walked to the balcony, and Shen Qingqiu could hear as Luo Binghe leaned against the doorway, his ears flicking back even as he kept staring into the distance.

“Aren’t you cold?” Luo Binghe asked, his deep voice carrying through the storm.

Shen Qingqiu turned around, gauging Luo Binghe’s mood. He seemed relaxed, leaning with his shoulders low and his hip co*cked, his arms crossed in front of him.

It seemed like the best time to start ingratiate himself further with Luo Binghe. Hesitantly he walked over to Luo Binghe who pushed the door open further so Shen Qingqiu could step through without touching him. Ignoring the offered space he walked right by him, brushing his body just barely against Luo Binghe.

The close proximity made him want to shrink back, but he controlled himself, hiding away the fear that threatened to wreak havoc on his self-control. He couldn’t show fear around Luo Binghe, couldn’t hide away or shrink down on himself if he wanted their relationship to progress. If he wanted freedom he would have to make Luo Binghe think he trusted him.

“I brought some food, are you hungry sweetheart?” Luo Binghe closed the doors and poked at the fireplace, sparking new life into the fire.

Luo Binghe sat down next to his bed, holding a bowl with meat in his hands. He carefully extended his arm, holding a slice of meat between his fingers and dangling it enticingly in front of Shen Qingqiu.

Barely daring to breathe, Shen Qingqiu limped over to Luo Binghe, getting just close enough to take the offered food from him. He kept his eyes on Luo Binghe’s face as he ate it, savoring the tangy and earthy taste. Once the piece was gone he was offered another and he took a step forward, trying to convey hesitation and willingness in his decision to get closer.

“There you go sweetheart,” Luo Binghe said, rewarding him with another strip of meat.

With each piece he came a little bit closer, and Luo Binghe decreased the distance between them by pulling his hand back little by little until Shen Qingqiu took the final piece only a hand span away from him.

Once he took the last piece Luo Binghe let his hand drop, sitting completely still and smiling at him. Luo Binghe’s hand twitched in his lap like he wanted to touch him, and Shen Qingqiu hesitated before curling up next to him, head parallel to Luo Binghe’s thigh.

A small, disbelieving breath left Luo Binghe as Shen Qingqiu settled in next to him. Yes, Shen Qingqiu thought, let Luo Binghe be awed. Let him be disbelieving and grateful for Shen Qingqiu’s supposed acceptance. It would make it so much sweeter once he managed to escape and Luo Binghe felt the sting of abandonment.

“Can I touch you?” Luo Binghe asked, and he wondered just how much Luo Binghe believed Shen Qingqiu understood. He turned his head towards him, nose bumping into Luo Binghe’s leg. Through the robes he could tell Luo Binghe still smelled like lavender from his bath, but he also smelled more earthy and more like himself. There was also a faint trace of sweet plum blossoms on him, the scent niggling at the back of his mind.

A careful hand slowly settled on his shoulders, long fingers stretching out across his back. All points of contact with Luo Binghe’s body warmed him, providing a distracting comfort despite who the source of it was. The fingers on his back curled into his fur, slowly petting him back and forth. It hurt his pride to act like a pet, to let Luo Binghe treat him like one, but he figured it hurt less than getting dismembered.

“You’re so soft. Once you get a bath you’re going to be softer than silk,” Luo Binghe commented as his hand travelled up to his head.

Clever fingers scratched behind one ear and instantly his nerves lit up, a physical sensation of relaxation travelling throughout his body. It felt good in a way no touch ever had, not even his own. It made his brain light up like a million stars while he was suffused with a calmness he hadn’t felt in years.

His tail thumped once before he caught himself, forcing the unruly limb to lie still under the onslaught of positive sensation. Maybe it was because as an adult he hadn’t experienced many kind touches, or because the last year had been filled with cruel, hurtful touches, but the way Luo Binghe touched him felt better than he could have ever expected. Especially since it was Luo Binghe whose fingers were rubbing his ears.

“There’s a good boy,” Luo Binghe said, fingers making a mess of Shen Qingqiu’s dignity. “You’re just a little softie, aren't you?”

And he wasn’t, he really wasn’t. But even if it was Luo Binghe who sat next to him, it was still nice to be treated kindly. It beat sitting in his cold cell, waiting for Luo Binghe to remember him long enough to come and torture him.

Sitting next to Luo Binghe was more peaceful than he ever thought possible. As a child Luo Binghe had always struggled with sitting still as Shen Qingqiu led the disciples through their meditation, always fidgeting and staring at him while the other disciples followed his directions. But now he was stock still, only his fingers moving as they sat together, the peacefulness almost sending Shen Qingqiu into a trance.

The moment was broken by a knock on the door, before the demon from earlier walked in, scrolls in hand. “Junshang, the western dignitaries will soon be arriving. I’ve set up the great hall for the meeting.”

“Thank you, Four Leaves. I’ll be right there,” Luo Binghe said while making no move to get up.

Four Leaves left, leaving them alone once more. Luo Binghe sighed, his fingers still combing through Shen Qingqiu’s fur. It seemed Shen Qingqiu might get the chance to act upon his plan sooner than he thought.

“I guess it’s time to go, sweetheart,” Luo Binghe said and gently ruffled his fur one last time before getting up.

Luo Binghe checked himself in the mirror, straightening his robes and tugging his sleeves in place with a roguish smile on his face, staring more at Shen Qingqiu’s reflection than his own.

“I’ll be back soon,” he said, like Shen Qingqiu was a pet that needed to be reassured.

The words meant to comfort him only made him want to bite Luo Binghe, to go for his legs and weaken him, to take him down for thinking Shen Qingqiu would ever be someone or something that needed to be comforted.

Instead he held himself back, getting up and limping along next to Luo Binghe as he walked to the door. Luo Binghe looked down at him as he opened the door, and he gave his best approximation of the animals he had seen charm Luo Binghe as a youngster, all big imploring eyes and hopeful demeanor.

Luo Binghe stared down at him, seemingly caught in hesitation. “You should really rest sweetheart,” he said, voice softening the more he looked at Shen Qingqiu.

“Fine,” he sighed, “I’ll leave the door open so you can explore as you wish. But only a little and return here when you’re tired!” Luo Binghe gestured to the fireplace before hesitating again.

“And no biting unless it’s necessary. Be good, sweetheart,” he added and left, casting a backwards glance at Shen Qingqiu standing in the doorway.

He waited until Luo Binghe had left before returning to his usual spot in front of the fire. He closed his eyes and finally let sleep take him now that he knew Luo Binghe would be busy. Hopefully there would be no beasts waiting for him in his dreams.

Chapter 7: The Intruder

Chapter Text

In his dreams Shen Qingqiu ran as a wolf, playfully racing the birds as they swooped across the fields and flew across the sky. The sun was high in the sky and warming him as he ran without stopping, lighting up his way in a day that seemed to never end. It felt like he could run forever, letting the wind pin his ears back as he gained maximum speed, nothing in his way of his freedom.

A shadow fell upon him as he snapped at a low hanging branch, and he looked up, for the first time noticing the clouds that had appeared. It made him pause and he slowed down but didn’t stop, trotting on as all around him the world turned a little darker as the sun hid from view.

A feeling grew in him that he had somewhere to be, like he needed to be somewhere before it was too late. Urgency coursed through him, gnawing at him from the inside out, threatening to undo him if he didn’t hurry. He picked up his pace again, stretching his legs as far as they could go as he took off running, but he didn’t know where he was running to, only that he had to keep going or else he would be too late.

A bamboo forest suddenly sprouted from the ground far in the distance, large and looming even from so far away. It felt right to run in that direction, to head for the safety of the familiar bamboo even if it was a long way away.

He had to keep running. He had to get to the bamboo forest before it was too late. There was no other option, he felt, than to run in that direction and hope he wasn’t too late. He had to-,

Shen Qingqiu woke with a start, ears moving straight forward and a growl ready in his throat. A faint sound of walking came from the hallway before someone appeared in the open doorway.

Shi Xingwu entered the room and upon seeing him looked at him with utter disdain. The need to lunge for her rose in his chest, but he stayed down, looking at her through half closed eyes, pretending to be far tamer than he felt. If he wanted to escape he might have to fool more than Luo Binghe that he was in fact docile and obedient.

She eyed him with caution as she walked across the room, but otherwise he was ignored. As she walked past him her steps made hardly any sound, but the scent of sweet plum blossoms invaded the air, filling up his nostrils and clogging his airways. He huffed through his nose and tempered down his own look of disdain as she glanced at him, her fingers hovering over Luo Binghe’s desk. The look she gave him was assessing, shrewd, but after a pause she picked up some of the papers on the desk, skimming through them.

She cast furtive glances at the door as she riffled through the desk, and as much as he hated thinking it, Shen Qingqiu hoped Luo Binghe would appear. It wasn’t the first time he wished for Luo Binghe to show up, but in the past he had only hoped for the beast to come by his cell and release him from whatever torture device he had been put in. Now he hoped Luo Binghe would come by because having Shi Xingwu in his room felt wrong. She was not supposed to be there, especially not alone.

As she carefully assessed the desk and started knocking on it, Shen Qingqiu considered the situation. Should he attack her and hope Luo Binghe would think he was defending Luo Binghe’s room? But she was strong, he had felt that firsthand, and he was still injured. And with his luck Luo Binghe would think he was a rabid animal posing a threat to his wives and put him down.

The knocking changed sounds, the solid noise turning hollow as Shi Xingwu knocked repeatedly in one spot. A look of triumph spread across her face as she reached under the desk, and a small compartment revealed itself. She pulled out several papers, skimming through them in a hurry as the look on her face turned even more triumphant.

The papers were put back after she was done reading them and she closed the compartment, smoothing down her skirt as she turned to leave. He thought she would continue to ignore him but something made her pause when she was next to him.

The stare she gave him was utterly disdainful, her nose scrunched up as she leaned over and looked down at him. “Such an ugly, pitiful thing,” she said. “I can’t wait for you to be gone.”

And Shen Qingqiu wanted to be gone. He didn’t want to be in this castle, in this room. But out of the two of them, he was certain he was the only one who was allowed in the room. He was the only one Luo Binghe allowed in there unsupervised, and she had no right to be there.

He lunged at her, taking her by surprise as he aimed for her hand. She quickly pulled back and perhaps she worried that a fight would reveal she had been there, because she hurried out of the room without a glance backwards, closing the doors so he couldn’t follow her.

It meant she didn’t see as Shen Qingqiu limped over to the desk and carefully spat out the silver bracelet he had snatched from her wrist. The small star-shaped diamonds glimmered in the light and he huffed, feeling incredibly pleased with himself. Now there was no way Luo Binghe wouldn’t know his wife had been there rummaging through his things.

The heavy, confident steps that he now knew belonged to Luo Binghe made his ears prick forward long before the man himself opened the doors and entered the room. Luo Binghe gestured at the doors, a curious look on his face.

“Did you close the doors, sweetheart? Had enough investigation for one day?” The curious look was quickly replaced by a frustrated one, and with a sigh he walked over to Shen Qingqiu, tugging on his belt and letting it fall on the floor. His robes were left hanging open, revealing his bare chest as he sank down to the floor next to Shen Qingqiu. One hand swept through his hair, making it fall rakishly around his face.

Shen Qingqiu wanted to roll his eyes at the forlorn yet debauched display. What had gotten into the beast now? Did someone else have more chest on display than him at a meeting? Did someone’s hair appeal more as a bird’s nest than his?

It didn’t really matter why the beast was upset; it was more important that he discovered the bracelet.

Luo Binghe sighed again, a tiny little sound that grated on Shen Qingqiu’s nerves. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, beast, and find the evidence! Shen Qingqiu stared in the direction of the bracelet, willing Luo Binghe to turn his head and look in the same direction. Instead, he saw something from the corner of his eye and he turned to see Luo Binghe biting his bottom lip before releasing it, reddened lips forming into a pout.

It proved too much for Shen Qingqiu, who got up and limped over to the desk. If Luo Binghe was too wrapped up in his own thoughts Shen Qingqiu would help him out, just this once. He nosed at the bracelet until his actions caught Luo Binghe’s attention and he came over to crouch down next to Shen Qingqiu. Luo Binghe picked up the bracelet, a frown marring his face as he stared at it before he opened the hidden compartment. He studied the content of the compartment silently before making his way over to his bed, sitting down at it as he dangled the bracelet from one finger in front of his face. The bracelet sparkled in the light as he studied it, the frown never leaving his face.

He stared at Luo Binghe. He wasn’t actually dumb enough not to know who the bracelet belonged to? Shen Qingqiu didn’t risk being beaten up by Shi Xingwu just for Luo Binghe to not have the intelligence enough to know that his “dancing star”, as he had called her, had been there?

Luo Binghe continued to stare at the bracelet as Shen Qingqiu stared at him. Really? Luo Binghe had spent days boasting about his campaigns and his plans, the bragging sometimes worse than the torture he put Shen Qingqiu through. From the continuous updates on his campaigns and his never-ending boasting he knew that Luo Binghe was far from stupid, despite the impression he had given Shen Qingqiu as a student.

A streak of something vicious, something dangerous flashed across Luo Binghe’s eyes and he gripped the bracelet in his hand so hard his knuckles turned white. “Fine,” he said in a low voice, his tone flat and deadly as he opened his hand.

Twisted pieces of silver fell to the floor, the diamonds scattering everywhere. His eyes darkened as his lips flattened into a line, eyebrows low as he stared at nothing.

Luo Binghe’s mood was almost tangible, so dark and volatile that Shen Qingqiu felt a twinge of fear. It made him want to tuck his tail between his legs and run, it made him want to run out and jump from the balcony, risking the fall rather than facing Luo Binghe’s anger.

With hesitation he limped over to Luo Binghe, hoping he would snap out of it if he saw Shen Qingqiu. But Luo Binghe only stared straight ahead, his mind far away and unreachable. It meant Shen Qingqiu would have to degrade himself by playing the loyal pet.

He pushed his head into Luo Binghe’s hand, hoping to get through to him, and when that didn’t work he jumped onto the bed. He stared at Luo Binghe, at the oversized, overpowered beast. This emperor in the making, according to Luo Binghe’s bragging. This man who decided over life and death, in particular Shen Qingqiu’s own life and death, and then Shen Qingqiu licked him across the face.

It took a second to register, and then Luo Binghe sputtered and turned his head just as Shen Qingqiu licked him again, making his tongue swipe across soft lips. They both sputtered at that, Luo Binghe pulling away with a laugh, while Shen Qingqiu once again considered jumping off the balcony, but this time in embarrassment.

The taste of woodsy and smokey skin lingered on his tongue, and in mortification he could feel his mouth watering. It triggered a want to bite into Luo Binghe, a need to taste more, and he looked away as Luo Binghe’s hand ruffled his fur.

“Thank you for the kisses sweetheart.” Luo Binghe joked, his clever fingers scratching behind his ears.

The mood felt lighter as Luo Binghe’s shoulders sank and he leaned back to lie down on the bed. A sigh slowly made its way seemingly from somewhere deep in Luo Binghe as he stared up into the ceiling, and Shen Qingqiu lied down next to him so he could watch his expression in case his mood soured again. Luo Binghe’s naturally warm body felt like it radiated heat, warming him up as effective as a fire.

“They didn’t find him anywhere,” Luo Binghe complained, his voice tinged with annoyance.

Ah. So it was Shen Qingqiu who inadvertently had made Luo Binghe kick up a fuss. Smugness filled him as he did his best to look at Luo Binghe with a blank face. It served Luo Binghe right, and it humored him greatly to know that Luo Binghe was looking everywhere for him as he was currently in his bed. If he was ever caught, he would make sure to taunt Luo Binghe with it for as long as he could, though he would skip the part where his tongue had briefly been in Luo Binghe’s mouth.

“I’m sure he’s not dead,” Luo Binghe said with conviction, one hand tightening into a fist on his chest. Shen Qingqiu wished he was a little less confident, a little more willing to not believe in his survival instincts.

“And while he’s out there running from me, others are trying to conspire against me. Like they could ever defeat me,” Luo Binghe huffed with derision.

“I gave her a chance to work with me and not against me. I guess we’ll see, or what do you think?” He turned his head towards Shen Qingqiu, giving him a crooked smile.

In his mind he thought giving Shi Xingwu a chance was foolish. Normally Shen Qingqiu didn’t approve of violence against women, but both times he had met Shi Xingwu there had been an inborn instinct to tear her apart. It was different than the need to bite he sometimes felt around Luo Binghe, around Shi Xingwu it was far deadlier and far more urgent.

“Let’s take a nap, sweetheart. I’m sure you had a long day exploring and you need your rest.” Luo Binghe got comfortable on the bed and gently tugged Shen Qingqiu close.

Shen Qingqiu wondered when he had given Luo Binghe the idea that it was alright to tug on him like a puppet. Just yesterday Luo Binghe hardly dared to touch him, and rightfully so. He was a fearsome creature. The endless night sky had married the eternal void and their marriage had created the beast he currently was! Still Luo Binghe tugged on him, one warm hand resting on Shen Qingqiu’s shoulder as he closed his eyes, his touch sending shivers down Shen Qingqiu's spine as he gently stroked his fur.

He stared at Luo Binghe as his face became slack, his features softening as he fell asleep. So often had Luo Binghe barged into his cell at all times of the day, even during the night, that he had almost thought Luo Binghe above the need to sleep, a relentless beast that never needed to rest. It was strange then, to have Luo Binghe so easily succumbing to sleep next to him.

It was another indication that Luo Binghe was comfortable around him, that he already trusted him. It was another step closer to freedom. A freedom that couldn’t come fast enough.

Chapter 8: Finding a Name

Chapter Text

Luo Binghe didn’t need to nap. Napping was something he hardly ever did unless it was between rounds with his wives when he had exhausted them all and needed to wait for them to regain strength.

But his new companion was so calm next to him that he was loath to get up and ruin this tentative friendship that was forming between them. So, he took the opportunity to enter the dreamscape and search for Shen Qingqiu.

The last time he had met him in the dreamscape Shen Qingqiu had been easy to find, like a beacon in the dark, but now the darkness was absolute, with no trace of him anywhere.

There was an unwavering certainty in him that Shen Qingqiu wasn’t dead, that he wasn’t too far away. But his men hadn’t found him during their search, and they had no clue where he could be.

He retraced his steps, walking through the familiar bamboo forest at Qing Jing peak where he had last seen Shen Qingqiu. The forest was empty, silent except for the soft rustling of the wind through the trees. It was a serene image, hiding the turmoil Luo Binghe always felt when thinking about the place.

The little bamboo house that Shen Qingqiu had called his home beckoned to him in the distance, but he turned his back to it. There would be nothing for him in that house, he knew that. Shen Qingqiu wouldn’t be there, wouldn’t go somewhere he would easily be trapped with little room to escape.

A thought bubbled to the surface of his mind, of dragging Shen Qingqiu into the house should he find him in the dreamscape again. Of dragging him in to rip him apart. Of rendering him helpless and burning the place down around him. It would show him that there was no escape from him, that nowhere he ran to would be safe from Luo Binghe.

He wondered if setting Shen Qingqiu on fire would produce the same fear on his face that he had seen the last time they met. No matter what Luo Binghe had done to Shen Qingqiu previously it had been met with resistance. Shen Qingqiu had met every lash of Luo Binghe’s whip with a silence so resilient it was eerie. Had dealt with his hair being cut off in public without losing that haughty demeanor, despite how Luo Binghe’s subordinates had jeered. When Luo Binghe hurt him, the most he had gotten was a few tears, but they had been involuntary, insignificant, meaningless. They had been tears made from anger, from pain, but not from any of the helplessness and despair that Luo Binghe wanted him to feel. That Luo Binghe had felt under his tutelage.

Ripping off his arm had made Shen Qingqiu’s eyes fill with tears, but once again they were brought from pain and not some deep anguish that Luo Binghe wanted him to feel.

Luo Binghe stopped walking, tugging on a leaf at eyelevel, half his mind on his surroundings, the other half on their meeting.

To his knowledge his former shizun hardly ever displayed any other than emotion than dismay. Even when Luo Binghe had won his fight during the demon invasion his win had been met with dismay with a hint of indifference. Only once had he seen something else directed at him, during that fateful day his life changed forever. Standing at the edge over the Endless Abyss, staring at Shen Qingqiu, he had seen a brief moment of hesitation, just enough to give him hope. During his time in the Abyss he had cursed that flicker of emotion, because the shattering of his hope had somehow felt worse than the fall itself.

For a long time he had wondered if the hesitation had been genuine. But Shen Qingqiu had never given him the benefit of the doubt, had never shown an ounce of care towards him, so in the end he had concluded it had to have been an act. A lie made to break him, to drive home the point that there was nothing left for him in the human realm. That he could rely only on himself.

Luo Binghe lied and deceived whenever he saw fit, but he had never lied to Shen Qingqiu after he had captured him. Had always been honest about what lied ahead of him, but maybe lying would be wise the next time saw Shen Qingqiu. The man had looked horrible, far thinner and more sickly than Luo Binghe had expected. Clearly it had been a mistake to leave Shen Qingqiu’s care to his guards. When he next found Shen Qingqiu he would have to convince him that Luo Binghe would treat him better. Would make him believe that going back to being Luo Binghe’s prisoner was better than braving the elements outside, better than fending for himself out there when he could be safe in Luo Binghe’s care. He would give Shen Qingqiu hope, one way or another, and then he would take it away.

He released the leaf, watching it bounce back into position. Until he got his hands on Shen Qingqiu he would keep searching while dealing with the coup that was approaching in the shadows. Soon enough he would have someone else to take his frustration out on until he found Shen Qingqiu.

-

He rose from the dreamscape, entering the waking world immediately as he always did. His new friend, who he needed to find a name for, rested next to him, obsidian eyes opening narrowly to observe him.

It really was a stunning creature and Luo Binghe had always had a weakness for dogs. As a child he had felt a solidarity with them, for they were both overlooked, discarded, chased away. As an adult he could see himself as a wolf, wild, free, a predator amongst sheep. As Luo Binghe he could identify with the creature next to him; a little rabid, a little untrusting. Special.

The wolf stared at him, not completely relaxed but with less hostility than when they first met. Their relationship was improving, and it had been surprisingly nice to return to his rooms and have someone waiting for him. Hopefully Luo Binghe would soon be trusted enough to be allowed to pet him without apprehension lingering between them. He was confident it would happen soon, he was good with animals, and he wanted to win over the wolf before it was healed. Before it was ready to be let go.

His fingers tightened in the soft, dirty fur, but he was mindful to keep his touch gentle as they regarded each other. He had already grown fond of the wolf. The thought of it leaving him made his stomach churn. Letting go of the things he considered his had always been hard. But did he have to let it go?

Maybe he could domesticate it a little. Feed it only the best meat, keep it warm and pampered. Keep it happy and satisfied. Just keep it. Gain its trust, gain a loyal friend. Have it stay, make it stay.

He scratched behind its ears, watching how the eyes seemed to close in reluctant bliss. This was a creature who didn’t know what a kind touch was, but it was already allowing Luo Binghe to pet it. With the right persuasion it should be easy to make it stay.

He hummed, watching the bottomless eyes open just a smidge. “Maybe we should find a name for you, what do you think?”

It stared at him, tilting its head at his words. Sometimes it seemed like it didn’t know what he was saying, sometimes it seemed like it knew exactly what was being said. He was certain it was smarter than the average creature, and it was definitely smart enough to hide just how much it understood.

The previous lord of the castle had done some disturbing experiments on the local wildlife while descending into madness. When Luo Binghe had taken him down the castle had almost been devoid of any servants, all of them having either fled or been locked up in the dungeon. The dungeon had been full of servants already subjected to his madness or waiting miserably to be experimented on. Luo Binghe’s soldiers had done the merciful thing, allowing them a chance in another life.

He would have to go through the documented experiments to find out if the wolf had been part of an experiment or if it was just a beast, just a creature. For the sake of both of their happiness he hoped for the latter.

He stroked across the wolf’s head, careful not to get too close to the eyes. If this was another experiment he was thankful it had managed to escape both the dungeon and his soldiers.

“How about Shadow?” It stared at him with little interest.

He thought about it, listing names he thought would be appropriate for a fearsome, glorious, wolf-like creature. “Alright, how about Omen? Ghost? Phantom?”

It sighed, a lengthy noise that conveyed how much it was suffering just listening to him.

“Bean?” That got an unfavorable reaction. It huffed, turning its head away.

He continued undeterred, a teasing tint to his voice. “Beauty? Peanut? Precious?”

A flick of its ear in his direction was the only reaction he got. “Precious? Is that it? I already call you sweetheart, isn’t that too much?”

It turned its head towards him again, its expressionless face still managing to convey how much it was done humoring him. There was a certain amount of regret he could feel coming from it, like it regretted not agreeing to any of the other names.

It did amuse him to call such a fearsome creature something so soft and silly. “Precious,” he cooed, fingers scratching behind its ears. “Sweetheart.”

If it was possible for a wolf to feel mortification, he was certain it was feeling it. “Precious, my sweetheart. We will be the best of friends.”

Chapter 9: To Pretend is to Fall

Chapter Text

Luo Binghe stayed in their room, doing paperwork on his desk, scribbling away and infuriating Shen Qingqiu just by existing in his presence.

He wanted to be alone so he could roll around in frustration, so he could sink his teeth and his claws into anything Luo Binghe seemed to value, like the various magical items littering the room. Wanted to be alone so he could shout and scream and release his frustration.

Precious! Who named someone like Shen Qingqiu Precious? If Luo Binghe ever found out Shen Qingqiu was his Precious, Shen Qingqiu would be in a world of trouble, more so than he already expected.

What was worse than the name was how Luo Binghe would randomly stop what he was doing to look over at him. “How are you, sweetheart?” he would ask with genuine care in his voice, like he expected Shen Qingqiu to suddenly need urgent attention.

The sounds of writing stopped, Luo Binghe putting down his work to look over at Shen Qingqiu once again. Maybe Luo Binghe was worried he would chew holes in his blankets if he was left alone too long.

He eyed them carefully. They were thick and comfortable, and clearly expensive. It would be a shame if someone ripped them apart. Carefully he pawed at a red blanket, mindful of his claws. It felt soft even to the rough skin on his paw and he couldn’t help but lower his head and rub his face into it, feeling the softness across his sensitive nose.

It smelled a lot like smoke and earth, a scent he now connected to Luo Binghe, mouthwatering in what had almost become an instinctive reaction. There was also a hint of something else now, a hint of bamboo with the touch of wilderness, something he knew was his own scent. To his dismay there was also the faint trace of dirt and grime.

He knew he was dirty, could feel it in his fur and on his skin, and Luo Binghe’s attempt at a wash that first day had not helped. But Shen Qingqiu wasn’t so far gone that he would attempt to groom himself. He wasn’t yet so far gone that he would lick himself clean, no matter how much he wanted to be clean. The preoccupation of cleanness was surely a sign that he was getting better, that he could now shift focus onto his appearance.

“You look comfortable.” Luo Binghe’s words broke through his thoughts about his cleanliness, mirth in his eyes as he watched Shen Qingqiu bury his head in the blankets.

There was a pause, something that would have been hesitation in anyone but Luo Binghe. “Perhaps too comfortable to join me in my duties?”

The desk was haphazardly organized before Luo Binghe got up, raising his arms high over his head in a lazy stretch, his robes becoming even looser as he then lowered his arms, revealing more of his unblemished skin and solid muscle.

“Duty calls, I have a meeting to attend,” Luo Binghe explained in a way that was wholly unnecessary yet natural. Like Luo Binghe wanted someone to talk to so much he’d stoop to talking to an animal that couldn’t answer him.

Attending a meeting could be interesting. It would chase away some of the boredom that Shen Qingqiu could feel creeping up on him, could chase away the growing urge to claw at bedsheets and sink his teeth into Luo Binghe, not to kill, but to taste.

And maybe it would provide deeper insight into how Luo Binghe ran things, how he handled important matters. Or maybe even more valuable, how he handled trivial matters.

Getting out of the bed with only one good front leg proved to be an awkward affair, and out of the corner of his eye he could see Luo Binghe hovering, hands moving forward but still held back, like Luo Binghe wanted to help but also wanted to allow him to try first.

He stopped leaning forward, turning his head with a tilt to look at Luo Binghe, the towering monster of his nightmares, and lifted his injured leg in a hesitant, sad little gesture.

Instantly, Luo Binghe was by his side, lifting him gently down to the floor, hands holding him in a secure grip until he was safely standing on his own legs, all while Shen Qingqiu gloated internally at how easy it was to manipulate Luo Binghe. A moment of hesitation before the hands left him completely told him all he needed to know of how willing Luo Binghe was to carry him, how willing he was to be of service.

If he wanted people to think of him as little more than a docile pet despite his looks, despite his sharp teeth and sharper claws, being carried would be a wise move. But his pride and self-respect held him back. It would have to be enough to be seen limping around, looking like a mangy street rat.

While getting out of bed was an issue, moving had turned far easier the more he got used to using three legs in a body that was designed for four. Luo Binghe still held himself back, walking slower than normal, but Shen Qingqiu smugly realized it wasn’t that much slower than normal. Once he gained full function of his injured leg he would be too fast for Luo Binghe to catch him once he decided to run.

They walked together through the castle, Luo Binghe gesturing and talking about various rooms and explaining interesting tidbits, half in a way that assumed Shen Qingqiu already knew them, half in a way as if Shen Qingqiu had never been indoors before. Unfortunately, Luo Binghe focused on the wholly wrong parts.

“-and of course, that’s the Qi Retrieval room,” Luo Binghe gestured to a set of heavy doors before pointing to a stick on the wall. “That’s a piece of wood I thought looked interesting. Do not chew on it.” It looked like an ordinary stick to Shen Qingqiu, and he promptly tried to ignore Luo Binghe’s explanation of where he found it and why he thought it looked interesting. He wanted to know more about the Qi Retrieval room, not some useless stick Luo Binghe thought was fascinating!

Luo Binghe, have some mercy on your former shizun! Don’t ramble on about insignificant things! But Luo Binghe still prattled on and on, and Shen Qingqiu listened despite his initial disinterest, swept away by Luo Binghe’s storytelling.

Luo Binghe spoke confidently and animatedly about his adventures, his stories engaging though lacking in basic knowledge. It was obvious that the grey ghost Luo Binghe had fought was an e gui, a hungry ghost, and Shen Qingqiu longed to interject with his knowledge, if only to fill that hole in what should be basic knowledge for someone who had most of the Demon Realm under his control.

So lost was he in Luo Binghe’s story that it was only after Luo Binghe had carried him down the stairs that Shen Qingqiu realized he had been lifted and carried like a child, Luo Binghe never stopping in his retelling as he neatly lifted him and put him back down.

“-and that’s when I saw it and brought it back with me.” Luo Binghe’s story concluded just as they reached a set of massive, looming doors, swiftly opened as they approached.

Luo Binghe stared down at him, a smile on his lips. “Now then, you’ll behave during the meeting, won’t you sweetheart?”

Shen Qingqiu could only stare back, his treacherous tail wagging once before he forced it still.

“That’s a good boy,” Luo Binghe said and petted his head, clever fingers scratching that sensitive spot behind his ears.

They walked past the line of waiting people together, Luo Binghe still walking in a pace that was comfortable for both of them. He recognized Mobei-jun amongst the people waiting, but before he could look at the others a waft of sweet plum blossoms caught Shen Qingqiu’s attention. As he limped past a tall man in a white robe it was clear the scent came from him. Without letting anything show, Shen Qingqiu kept staring forward as they approached a raised platform with a modestly decorated throne. Luo Binghe let Shen Qingqiu take the few steps up by himself and settle on the edge of the platform before he sat down on the throne, Mobei-jun coming to stand by his side in silence.

Much to Shen Qingqiu’s disappointment Luo Binghe looked at home among the golden décor, even with his insolent, relaxed posture. He had thought the great, hulking beast would look like a fish out of water on a seat of power, in a seat that demanded respect. Instead he looked at ease, confident and assured in his right to sit there. Luo Binghe had often visited him in his cell just to brag about his plans on becoming emperor, and Shen Qingqiu had always scoffed at it, thinking it was ridiculous. But now the image of Luo Binghe on the Dragon Throne wasn’t funny anymore. It felt all too real.

Luo Binghe’s demeanor changed as he got comfortable on the throne, the warmth he showed Shen Qingqiu turning to cold confidence as he regarded the people in front of him. They all looked to him without moving, and only when he gestured them forward did they approach.

The tall man Shen Qingqiu had noticed stepped in front of the others, bowing as he greeted Luo Binghe. “Junshang, the report from the Western Kingdom indicates a possible mobilization of their army to the border. I advise we take swift action to keep them from reaching the border.”

Another man, this one older, with a long white beard shook his head. “The Western Kingdom might not be under Junshang’s rule yet, but Hou-jun has been receptive to negotiations. If we act without actual evidence we will destroy whatever goodwill the Kingdom has towards us.”

The first man kept his eyes on Luo Binghe, not bothering to look at anyone else. “It’s imperative that we act swiftly. If they reach the border the fight will be harder.”

“It’s imperative that we don’t cause unnecessary bloodshed. Hou-jun’s priority has always been his kingdom and its people. If we act without provocation like Cui Yongzheng clearly wants, we risk any chance of further diplomacy.”

The first man, who had to be Cui Yongzheng turned towards his opponent. “Diplomacy is useless if it only leads to loss. Or did you learn nothing when Lord Luo conquered your domain, Pan Bai?”

Pan Bai’s face turned slightly red at the jab. “I learned that Lord Luo’s victory was inevitable. It allowed me to let my people live under another ruler without loss of life. A chance I’m sure Hou-jun will appreciate. As your people did too, when Lord Luo conquered the Hold.”

Luo Binghe watched them bicker without changing his expression, but as the men drew closer to each other he gestured once more and they stopped, turning towards him while shooting each other annoyed glances.

Cui Yongzheng bowed towards Luo Binghe. “Junshang, a sign of force might scare Hou-jun into surrendering. Sending troops to the border doesn’t mean you have to use them, only that you’re prepared in case an act of aggression happens.”

Luo Binghe shared a look with Mobei-jun, before he addressed Cui Yongzheng. “The troops will be readied.” Then he turned his attention towards Pan Bai. “I’ll set up a personal meeting with Hou-jun. If he’s mobilizing his army against me, I will set him straight.”

Luo Binghe’s last words seemed to lower the temperature in the room, yet Pan Bai bowed with obvious relief. “Thank you, Junshang,” he said, while Cui Yongzheng bowed next to him, a displeased little frown flashing across his face.

Shen Qingqiu had heard of Hou-jun long before Luo Binghe entered the Endless Abyss. As Cang Qiong Mountain Sect’s expert on all things related to demons he knew more about the local rulers than anyone else. During Luo Binghe’s absence he had even met Hou-jun by accident by the borderlands.

And the old man was right about Hou-jun. He valued his citizens highly and made sure they lived well. Which was why they were fond of their local leader, and why they would resist harder than other territories if Luo Binghe took over with brute force. Other demonic citizens valued strength, and a usurper might find the citizens appreciative if the leadership was won with bloodshed, but not the citizens of the Western Kingdom. They liked Hou-jun. They appreciated how he worked for them and with them, instead of them only working for him.

Such a man could be convinced to hand over leadership to Luo Binghe without contest if it was for the best of his people, and if Luo Binghe was clever he would put Hou-jun in the position as the ruler underneath Luo Binghe’s command.

As his advisors talked, Luo Binghe occasionally did subtle grabby hands towards Shen Qingqiu. He willfully ignored it, too busy studying the advisors as they brought up various key issues. Most of them were older people who stemmed from all parts of the Demon Realm. They gave a mixture of advice, not always agreeing with each other, but often finding common ground. It was a good council, especially as a counter to Luo Binghe and Mobei-jun’s youthful bravado.

Cui Yongzheng was younger than the rest and was probably around Luo Binghe’s age. Throughout the discussions he sided mostly with Luo Binghe, in a way that made Shen Qingqiu take notice.

“-and we should allow them their traditional festivities,” Luo Binghe said, one hand trying to tempt Shen Qingqiu closer.

“That would be wise,” Cui Yongzheng agreed.

There seemed to be a pattern with what advice Cui Yongzheng gave. He listened until Luo Binghe commented on an issue before taking a side, always supporting Luo Binghe without making it too obvious or sycophantic. He made it seem like he saw both sides, while always ending up on Luo Binghe’s side.

Throughout the meeting Luo Binghe often nodded as Cui Yongzheng spoke, and as the council continued an unsettled feeling gathered in Shen Qingqiu. Cui Yongzheng reminded him of Shang Qinghua, always saying the right things while having a hundred contradictory plans moving in the background. If all the Peak Lords had different opinions about something, Shang Qinghua would agree with all of them privately, while doing something completely different on his own. Cui Yongzheng seemed to have a similar personality except less obviously smarmy.

The grabby hands in his side vision turned too obvious to ignore, and he turned his head towards Luo Binghe. “Come here Precious,” he said, gesturing to his side.

Shen Qingqiu suffered the indignity of silence spreading across the room as he limped over to Luo Binghe. He sat down next to him, resting his head on Luo Binghe’s knee and stared up at him, hiding his annoyance behind a calm façade as he submitted to being treated like a pet.

But then Luo Binghe stroked over a spot right above the middle of his eyes, and the mortification he felt washed away on a wave of pure physical bliss. It made his eyes close involuntarily as his body sagged, knocking into Luo Binghe who took all his weight without complaint.

The sound of renewed talking became background noise, the voices turning almost indistinguishable against the calm of his mind as Luo Binghe rubbed behind his ears with confidence. Some part of him knew that this was a primal response, a response governed by whatever he had become and not by who he really was, but he went along with it. It was easier to maintain the lie that he was just a pet if he acted like one without his human embarrassment getting in the way.

The voices in the background disappeared, and when he opened his eyes all that was left was him, Luo Binghe, and Mobei-jun, who was staring down at him with an expressionless face.

Mobei-jun didn’t worry him too much. From what he knew he lacked Luo Binghe’s cruelness and his shrewdness, though he had the advantage of growing up in the Demon Real, unlike Luo Binghe, making him far more knowledgeable about demonic traditions and ways of life.

Mobei-jun kept his eyes on Shen Qingqiu as he spoke. “There are no new leads to investigate. All leads have been exhausted.”

Luo Binghe’s hands stilled in Shen Qingqiu’s fur as he thought. “Then we wait,” he said with a sigh.

They were clearly talking about Shen Qingqiu, and it filled him with glee to know he was evading their grasp while being right in front of them. He thumped his tail, nudging Luo Binghe’s head. Look at me, he thought, look at me but don’t see me.

Luo Binghe’s long fingers rubbed his chin, and Shen Qingqiu sighed, resigned to feeling pleasure at Luo Binghe’s hands.

“And Shen Qingqiu?” Luo Binghe’s question made Shen Qingqiu tilt his head in confusion.

Hadn’t they just been discussing him? Was something else going on that he didn’t know about?

Mobei-jun’s head dipped a little, his eyes still on Shen Qingqiu. “There’s no trace of him either. The scouts are searching the river again, but with little luck.”

Luo Binghe framed Shen Qingqiu’s face with his hands, stroking close to his nose. The touch was itchy in a not completely unpleasant way, the proximity filling his senses with Luo Binghe completely, sending conflicting shivers down his spine.

The closeness made him want to bite Luo Binghe, to take a couple of his fingers off and run away. To snap at his face and go for his throat. But when Luo Binghe stroked from his nose and up between his eyes, making his eyes close reflexively, the touch felt pleasant and even safe. It made him want to hurt Luo Binghe even more.

Luo Binghe looked up at Mobei-jun, who finally looked away from Shen Qingqiu. “Let them search. I’ll go looking too.” Mobei-jun nodded and left, leaving them alone.

“I think it’s time for food, what do you think?” Luo Binghe got up, patiently waiting for Shen Qingqiu to make his way down the platform.

They made their way back to their rooms together, Luo Binghe once again filling the silence with inane chatter that Shen Qingqiu nevertheless listened to. He didn’t put up a fight as Luo Binghe lifted him into his arms at the bottom of the stairs, letting the beast carry him up without complaint, safe in the knowledge that Luo Binghe wouldn’t let him fall.

Food was already waiting for them when they returned, and Luo Binghe fed them both, handfeeding Shen Qingqiu with one hand and eating with the other. As Shen Qingqiu took a strip of meat from Luo Binghe, he understood it was another trick by Luo Binghe to foster goodwill between them. Luo Binghe could have let him eat by himself, but by continuing to handfeed Shen Qingqiu he was trying to strengthen the bond between them.

It amused Shen Qingqiu to know he wouldn’t fall for it. He wouldn’t be tricked by good food and gentle hands, wouldn’t fall for sweet words and kind gestures. And when Luo Binghe laid down on the bed to sleep, it was natural for Shen Qingqiu to curl up next to him, to accept the warm hand on his shoulder, certain that Luo Binghe would never slip through his defenses.

Chapter 10: Childish Displays

Chapter Text

The forest floor was soft beneath his feet, the grass poking between his toes where he stood among the trees on his peak. No buildings were in sight, but he didn’t need them to know where he was. After all, he knew Qing Jing Peak like the back of his hand. Knew where he would most likely never step foot again.

It was sunny and warm, like the day Luo Binghe had come back for him, the sun peeking through the leaves like beams of light. It was more than warm enough that he felt comfortable despite his lack of clothes.

The realization that he was in the dreamscape hit him the moment he crinkled his toes in the grass and the sensation felt just a bit off. His body felt just a little too disconnected from his mind for it to be reality, but too solid for it to be a normal dream.

Which meant he was in Luo Binghe’s territory again. He cursed himself. How could he have fallen asleep? But he knew how. It had been the exhaustion from attending the meeting while still recovering, it was the belly full of good food. It was the warm hand, anchoring him to Luo Binghe’s side.

Shen Qingqiu pinched himself, trying to wake himself up. It stung, like a dream wouldn’t do, but he was still trapped in the forest. He looked around, and when he saw no trace of Luo Binghe, he took an uncertain step forward. Maybe he wouldn’t meet Luo Binghe. Maybe being in his dreamscape didn’t automatically mean being found out.

As he walked he assessed himself. His arm still hurt, but it felt more like a tender sprain, more like a bone mostly healed. It was healing faster than normal, most likely due to a combination of Luo Binghe’s care and his new body’s accelerated healing.

He walked among the forest, telling himself that moving around would lessen the chance of meeting Luo Binghe, but in truth he wanted to see as much of his peak as he could before it was too late.

Had he known that day that Luo Binghe would take him away, he would have done things differently. Had he known then, what he knew now, he would have tried to make things right. But that was then, and hindsight only ever revealed what a fool he was.

He stopped by a cluster of white chrysanthemums, gifted to him by Mu Qingfang when they were promoted to Peak Lords. Mu Qingfang had gifted each Peak Lord with a medicinal plant that he believed suited them. At first, he had been offended, angry at the implications. Believed it to be a jab at his unstable core, at his perceived weaknesses. But Mu Qingfang had stared at him with those kind eyes, had shown him how to make his own chrysanthemum tea, and he had finally accepted the gift for what it was; kindness. The last piece of kindness any Peak Lord had shown him once they realized just how prickly he was.

Crouching down, he picked up a flower, lifting it high as he got up to admire the yellow color in the light. He squinted at it, brows creasing in confusion, before staring down at the yellow flowers at his feet. Hadn’t they been white just a moment ago?

A prickle developed at the base of his neck, making its way down his spine. Behind him, a faint sound of footsteps grew louder, and he could feel the blood drain from his face. He wanted to run. He wanted to turn into the wolf and run away on all fours, with his tail tucked between his legs. Instead, he turned, with his hand still outstretched, holding the flower at chest height.

“For me? Ah, Shen Qingqiu, you shouldn’t have.” Luo Binghe’s hand cupped his, the other taking the yellow chrysanthemum from him.

It turned a deep red as Luo Binghe lifted it to his nose, making a show of breathing in its scent. Luo Binghe’s fingers closed around his hand, holding him there.

The grip tightened as Luo Binghe pinned the flower to his robe, the red petals standing in stark contrast to the black fabric. It made Shen Qingqiu even more aware that he was once again naked in Luo Binghe’s presence.

Luo Binghe’s eyes were all over him, taking in his appearance. “You look better. Not well, but better.” There was a speculative glint in his eyes, but whatever he was thinking he was holding it back.

Shen Qingqiu couldn’t hold back a sneer. “I’m sorry to disappoint you.”

“I’m not disappointed. It means you’re not out there dying without me.” Luo Binghe’s lips formed a sharp smile at his last words.

“Your concern is touching.” Shen Qingqiu filled his words with mockery as he tugged on his hand.

“Don’t for a moment think I’m concerned.” The grip on his hand tightened further, and Shen Qingqiu clenched his teeth at the pain blooming from his hand.

Against every instinct he took a step closer to Luo Binghe, hissing his angry words at him. “If you start ripping off my limbs I’ll leave again. And there goes your chance to figure out where I am.”

The grip around his hand loosened, yet he wasn’t released. Silence crept between them as Luo Binghe stared at him, eyes narrowing as he searched his face, trying to see if he was bluffing.

Luo Binghe’s smile turned up further on one side, transforming it from something sharp to something boyish, teasing. “And why would you stay if you can leave?”

It was a question Shen Qingqiu had hoped Luo Binghe wouldn’t ask, but Luo Binghe had once again proven to be uncooperative. He remembered the sad look he had given Luo Binghe before he had been lifted from the bed. How Luo Binghe seemed to resonate with broken things.

He let his eyes fall to the hollow of Luo Binghe’s throat, forcing back the growing urge to bite, and hunched his shoulders just a little bit. “Do you ever have bad dreams, Luo Binghe?”

Luo Binghe’s strong brows wrinkled as he looked at Shen Qingqiu with confusion. “No, what does that have to do with my question?”

Shen Qingqiu kept his eyes down, turning his gaze to the side to stare into the forest. “Because being here is far better than being in one of my bad dreams.”

He looked up at Luo Binghe, selling the lie with everything he had. “Staying here while you try to trick my location out of me might be preferrable to being in a nightmare. Though I’ll take those over getting ripped apart again.”

Luo Binghe snorted, the warm air dancing across Shen Qingqiu’s face with how close they had become. “What does Shen Qingqiu dream of? What do you fear? Is it me?” His dark eyes lit up at the thought.

“I’ve had worse experiences in my life than you, Luo Binghe,” he said, letting his eyes drop once more.

A frown grew on Luo Binghe’s face, and Shen Qingqiu could feel his heart rate pick up. Perhaps he had oversold the pitiful expression he was going for. “Though your first guqin experience still haunts me,” he added, trying to restore the balance between believable misery and uncharacteristic emotional sharing.

The fingers around his hand flexed, tightening and loosening as Luo Binghe stared at him. He tugged on his hand once again, sighing through his nose in irritation. “Now, will you kindly let me go?”

Luo Binghe’s face took on a thoughtful look, eyes narrowing in consideration. “I’ll let you go if you do one thing.”

Whatever it was couldn’t be good, but Shen Qingqiu sighed, resigned to entertain Luo Binghe’s demand. “What?”

Luo Binghe’s available hand made a twirling gesture. “Turn around.”

Shen Qingqiu froze, his mind working through every possible explanation for Luo Binghe’s demand. “Why, so you can stab me in the back?”

“I won’t stab you. No trickery at all. I just want you to turn around.” The expression on Luo Binghe’s face appeared earnest, but it was also the same look he wore when he had reassured Shen Qingqiu that he would pay for his crimes. Earnest. Cruel. Fully believing his own misguided justification.

But if Shen Qingqiu didn’t turn around, Luo Binghe wouldn’t let him go. And if he wasn’t let go, Luo Binghe would most likely expect him to disappear. And when Shen Qingqiu stayed, his bluff would be called.

Hesitantly and with narrowed eyes he turned, hand still held by Luo Binghe. It allowed him to turn until his back was fully to Luo Binghe, but no further. He cast a glance over his shoulder, half expecting to see Luo Binghe with a knife in his hand. Instead, Luo Binghe’s gaze was on his back, making its way down from his shoulders to the small of his back.

His blood ran cold, anger and humiliation licking up his spine and across his face. Until they met in the dreamscape Luo Binghe had never seen him naked. Had never seen the old scars across his back. Had never seen evidence contradicting Shen Qingqiu’s background story that he was nothing other than a spoiled second son.

Affronted, he tried to turn, and Luo Binghe’s grip finally let go of him. Instead of holding on to his hand, Luo Binghe grabbed the back of Shen Qingqiu’s head, fingers digging into his short hair and gripping it tightly. With his other hand Luo Binghe pushed down on his shoulder as he kicked him in the back of one knee, sending Shen Qingqiu to his knees.

From there it was a humiliatingly short struggle until he was flat on his stomach with Luo Binghe straddling his waist. Shen Qingqiu’s fingers dug into the ground as he tried to crawl away, the grip on his hair threatening to pull it out by the roots. Terror flooded him, along with anger directed at himself at his stupidity. It felt like his lungs couldn’t get enough air, like the fall had made them several sizes too small.

Luo Binghe leaned forward, the hand on his head pushing his face into the ground with steady pressure. “Easy now,” Luo Binghe said, in a tone he had only heard him use when he thought Shen Qingqiu was Precious.

“Easy,” Luo Binghe murmured into his ear, his tone taking on an amused tint as one hand pressed against Shen Qingqiu’s side like a branding iron.

When no further pain was forthcoming Shen Qingqiu gave up on struggling, pushing aside how his pride stung at being so easily overpowered.

When Luo Binghe realized he had stopped fighting he made a sound halfway between a coo and a laugh. Luo Binghe still held him by the hair, still pushed his face into the ground, but the other hand made its way up to his shoulders. With a touch as light as a breeze, his fingers traced across his back from one side to another, making their way down slowly.

Shen Qingqiu’s skin broke out in goosebumps, and he couldn’t stop the occasional shiver from racing down his spine as Luo Binghe explored the evidence from his harsh youth. The gentle, mocking touch made him want to resume struggling, made him want to act reckless and claw and bite at whatever part of Luo Binghe he could reach. But he held himself back, submitting to the emotional discomfort rather than escalating the situation to physical pain.

He tempered down the need to hurl insults as Luo Binghe shifted back to sit on his thighs, so his fingers could trace the scars across the small of his back, and then Shen Qingqiu held his breath, waiting for those same fingers to follow the scars that ran across the swell of his ass.

When the touch never came, he turned his head as much as Luo Binghe allowed it, taking in the beast hovering above him. Luo Binghe’s lips had a curious downward tilt, his eyes narrowed in irritation.

“I didn’t do this,” he said, letting his fingers retrace their pattern back up towards Shen Qingqiu’s shoulders again.

“You’re not the first bad thing that crawled into my life, Luo Binghe.” Shen Qingqiu’s voice came out smaller than he wanted, and he cursed himself for the genuine display of weakness.

“But at least I am the worst,” Luo Binghe stated, fingers following a scar across his side to where Shen Qingqiu was pressed against the ground. Shen Qingqiu scoffed at the incorrect assumption as he jerked away from the irritating, tickly touch.

Luo Binghe stilled his movements, frozen in motion like a predator right before it struck at its prey. The grip on Shen Qingqiu’s head disappeared as he was roughly turned over until he was lodged between Luo Binghe’s thighs, head spinning from how quickly it had happened.

“I don’t believe that,” Luo Binghe said, but it was hard not to hear I don’t believe you, instead.

Bitterness filled Shen Qingqiu at the all too familiar words. “Of course you don’t. Because you know everything, don’t you, Luo Binghe?”

There was a chance he could end their confrontation now, as he recalled how Luo Binghe’s hand twitched when he had been in the dreamscape while Shen Qingqiu was awake. And how Shen Qingqiu himself had escaped the dreamscape when he had been scared enough to kick out both in the dream and in the real life.

He could feel a sneer twisting his lips, and he reached up and pulled on Luo Binghe’s robes until he leaned down, eyes wide with unnamed emotion. “But you don’t know anything, Luo Binghe.”

They were face to face, only a hair width between them, Luo Binghe’s breath warm against his face. “You don’t even know where I am,” Shen Qingqiu murmured, voice soft and mocking.

Luo Binghe face twisted with anger and his hands shot out, grabbing Shen Qingqiu’s head in a crushing grip. And as pain poured into him Shen Qingqiu laughed, jolting awake.

He was back in his wolf form, Luo Binghe’s fingers threatening to break the bones in his shoulder where they dug into him. Shen Qingqiu twisted out of the grip, panting in fear as he scrambled to the other side of the bed.

It only took a moment, and then Luo Binghe’s eyes blinked open. The first thing Luo Binghe did was reach out, frowning in confusion as Shen Qingqiu couldn’t help but shrink back. Then Luo Binghe’s eyes landed on the red lines his nails had carved into Shen Qingqiu’s shoulder.

“Easy now,” Luo Binghe said, the familiar words filling Shen Qingqiu with nausea.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Luo Binghe’s outstretched hand fell, fingers gripping the blanket until the knuckles turned white. His gaze was on Shen Qingqiu’s new injury, his eyes dodging away from Shen Qingqiu’s face.

Luo Binghe looked properly apologetic, his lips twisting down and his eyes wide and sorrowful. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, I’m sorry.”

Shen Qingqiu watched him silently, not coming closer but not creating further distance between them. He watched as Luo Binghe got up, making sure to keep his movement slow as he rummaged around his shelfs until he found a vial and a clean cloth.

He brought it with him as he sat down on his side of the bed, careful to keep distance between them. “Will you let me see, sweetheart?”

But Shen Qingqiu didn’t want to let him see. Didn’t want to be close to him. Didn’t want to allow him to touch him again, but as Luo Binghe crept closer he stayed still, letting Luo Binghe reach for him again.

Luo Binghe’s touch was gentle as he dabbed ointment on the scratches, the gentleness now hauntingly familiar. When Shen Qingqiu didn’t try to move away he took the opportunity to check on his other injuries as well, humming to himself as he unwrapped his leg.

“It’s looking a lot better. You’re healing so well, Precious.” Luo Binghe’s tone was soft and low, but his eyes stayed down, refusing to look at Shen Qingqiu.

Luo Binghe was ashamed. That he had the capacity to feel ashamed was a novel concept to Shen Qingqiu. When Shen Qingqiu had singled Luo Binghe out, pointing out his weaknesses in front of the other disciples, Luo Binghe had sometimes been flush with embarrassment. His hands had clenched at his side in impotent rage, knuckles white as he was treated to Shen Qingqiu’s cruel tutelage. But he had never once shown shame.

Shame was evident in Luo Binghe’s tentative touch as he gently stretched Shen Qingqiu’s injured leg out, Luo Binghe running his hands along the healed fracture. “I think you can start putting weight on your leg now,” Luo Binghe said, another degree of discontent flashing across his face.

Was Luo Binghe worried Shen Qingqiu would run away now? He had planned on staying until he was sure the leg wouldn’t hinder him and until the weather stabilized enough that he could realistically survive out there on his own. But if Luo Binghe worried Shen Qingqiu would disappear, he might decide to lock the door again. Might keep such a close watch on Shen Qingqiu that escape would almost be impossible.

He thumped his tail twice and scuttled forward. Closing his eyes, cursing every god he could think off, he licked Luo Binghe’s hand once.

A hesitant hand came to rest on his head, and he opened his eyes, watching as Luo Binghe’s eyes softened, the corners of his lips shyly tugging his lips into a relieved smile.

“Thank you, sweetheart.” Luo Binghe leaned down, resting his forehead against Shen Qingqiu’s. “It won’t happen again. I won’t hurt you.”

The close proximity made Shen Qingqiu’s spine itch, his every instinct telling him to lash out. Once again he was filled by the need to bite Luo Binghe, to drag him down and keep him down. Luo Binghe straightened up before Shen Qingqiu lost the fight with his instincts, getting up to wander the room.

“How is he doing it? How can he leave when he wants to?” Luo Binghe crossed the room, opening up the balcony doors to stare at the snow. He seemed lost in thought as he stepped out, oblivious to the snow falling on him.

Shen Qingqiu ambled over to stand next to him. When Luo Binghe tilted his head down to look at him, Shen Qingqiu could see the snowflakes clinging to his eyelashes, the way the snow gathered almost like a crown upon his head. Combined with his sullen frown it made him look like a despairing prince. Against the early morning sky he appeared ethereal, a despondent, dangerous specter that would haunt Shen Qingqiu until he died, and then follow him into the next life.

Luo Binghe fell back dramatically, snow flying as he threw himself backwards into the snow. Gone was the haunting ghost, Shen Qingqiu thought as he padded over. As he stared down at Luo Binghe, whose eyes reflected the few stars still visible in the brightening sky, he didn’t see a ghost.

“I even tried to be nice, but he always makes me so angry!” Warm breath melted the falling snowflakes as Luo Binghe spoke, but a few fell on pouting lips and framed disbelieving eyes with white, and all Shen Qingqiu could see was a child throwing a tantrum. Nice? Was pushing him down and touching him nice? Did Luo Binghe believe that the absence of pain made him nice?

He had never seen Luo Binghe act like a child before, not even when he had been one. Back then, Ning Yingying would cry and stomp her feet when she found something unfair. Even Ming Fan had occasionally found the bravery to huff and make faces behind Shen Qingqiu’s back, but Luo Binghe had never acted like a child, and Shen Qingqiu had never thought of him as one. But staring down at Luo Binghe, he had to wonder which part had come first.

He huffed and turned around, leaving Luo Binghe to sulk by himself. The introspection wouldn’t help him. Thinking of Luo Binghe with sympathy wouldn’t help him. This was the man who just moments ago tried to crack his head open like a watermelon in the dreamscape. What good would it do to entertain such thoughts?

Still, leaving him out there to think too hard about how Shen Qingqiu escaped the dreamscape probably wasn’t the wisest idea. The idea of licking Luo Binghe’s face again was too abhorrent to even consider, but just staring at him hadn’t distracted him enough. If he wanted to successfully distract Luo Binghe, he would have to disregard his pride and stoop low.

He slinked back, crouching down to stalk towards Luo Binghe without a sound. The snow was so high it hid Luo Binghe’s face from view, which allowed Shen Qingqiu some cover. His belly touched the ground as he crawled forward, ears up and sharp as he let his body’s instincts take over.

Shen Qingqiu approached slowly, his large paw allowing him to thread silently through the snow. Luo Binghe’s breath appeared as little clouds drifting upwards from where he was hidden, revealing just where he was. It was as if his body knew when he was close enough to attack, as it stilled, preparing to pounce. A sensation like the air before lightning strikes filled his head as he readied himself.

Luo Binghe’s head rose, and his eyes had barely crept above the surface of the snow as he made a confused sound before Shen Qingqiu launched himself at him, mindful of his claws as he pounced on Luo Binghe’s chest.

Strong arms came up to catch him, and he and Luo Binghe rolled together through the snow as he snapped at the air, mindful of his teeth and his claws. He hit Luo Binghe in the face with a satisfying thud, a startled laugh escaping from Luo Binghe at the action. It was degrading and humiliating to roll around like a child, or worse, a pet, with Luo Binghe. It was exhilarating and thrilling to snap and claw, to wrestle and fight, without the fear of pain that had been present his entire life.

Together they rolled around, wrestling each other and pushing each other into the snow. He could tell Luo Binghe was mindful of his injuries, despite how well he had healed, holding himself back to not push Shen Qingqiu too hard.

“Oof,” Luo Binghe said in exaggeration as he rolled over on his back, Shen Qingqiu perched on his chest in smug victory.

They were both panting as Luo Binghe’s hands came up to rest at his sides, warm despite the snow they had just dived into. Luo Binghe was covered in so much snow his hair almost looked white, his eyelashes and eyebrows littered with snow.

They were both breathing hard, and Luo Binghe’s cheeks were flushed red, his pink lips stretched out into a wide smile as they both regarded each other. Shen Qingqiu snapped his mouth shut with an audible click, tempering down an urge to lick Luo Binghe across the face, to taste the glistening skin above his brow.

Shen Qingqiu jumped off, reveling in the breath of air the action punched out of Luo Binghe, and slinked back inside to the fireplace, confident that Luo Binghe would soon follow. Why did this body want to eat Luo Binghe so badly? Were its kind and Heavenly Demons enemies? Was his body holding on to such knowledge?

Luo Binghe stumbled in, shaking off snow like a dog as he stepped inside. His hair was a mess, and Shen Qingqiu tsked internally at the sight. His inner monologue about the necessity of taking care of hair was interrupted by Luo Binghe crouching down next to him by the fire.

“So, I’m forgiven?” Luo Binghe’s voice was hopeful, his face open and earnest.

If only he could tell him no. If only he could safely convey in all the ways Luo Binghe would never be forgiven, and promptly shove him into the fire. But Luo Binghe wasn’t asking for forgiveness for the suffering he had heaped upon Shen Qingqiu, he was asking Precious for forgiveness.

He thumbed his tail twice, blinking up at Luo Binghe in a way he hoped conveyed forgiveness. Luo Binghe’s face softened, removing a tension that Shen Qingqiu hadn’t noticed until it disappeared.

Luo Binghe’s hands slowly reached over, and when he didn’t move away they scratched behind his ears, sending pleasure through his body. It felt nice enough that irritation flooded him when a knock came on the door and Luo Binghe stopped what he was doing.

Four Leaves entered, bowing neatly before speaking. “Junshang, Hou-jun has agreed to see you in the morning.” Pressuring a beleaguered lord into meeting him on such short notice was a presumptuous move only Luo Binghe could have done.

“Good. Thank you,” Luo Binghe said and stared at Shen Qingqiu. “It’s almost dawn already. I’ll be ready to go soon, but first, I think a bath is in order. For both of us.” Shen Qingqiu could feel his eyes widening almost comically in anticipation.

Finally, he would get the chance to be rid of all the filth and grime. And then Luo Binghe would leave, hopefully allowing Shen Qingqiu time to make plans for his future escape. He just had to suffer through the indignity of being bathed as a pet first. But there was nothing he wouldn’t suffer through for a better tomorrow.

With that in mind, he curled up in front of the fire, patiently waiting for his bath. And when Luo Binghe settled down next to him, Shen Qingqiu didn’t think twice about resting his head on Luo Binghe’s thigh. The hand that immediately came up to pet him confirmed what he already knew; that Luo Binghe was well and truly in the palm of his hand.

Chapter 11: Reminiscence and Resolve

Chapter Text

Lounging next to the fireplace, Luo Binghe kept petting Precious as the servants drew the bath, watching as they ran to and from to set up not only his tub but a smaller one for Precious.

From the moment he got his first servants they had always been respectful and kind to him, but as he rose to power there came a day when he entered the kitchen to make breakfast for one of his wives, and the chatter stopped. The laughter died down the moment they saw him, and in its absence politeness built a wall between him and them. He had been one of them, just a washerwoman’s son, but then he became more, and he lost somewhere to belong to he hadn’t even known he was part of.

Now, the servants bowed in greeting whenever they saw him, always reminding him that his station was above them, away from them. The servants scurried around the room, cleaning what they were allowed to while the bath filled with warm, sweet-smelling water. But in that moment, even if they didn’t look at him, he didn’t feel alone in a room full of other people. The dark head on his thigh shifted minutely, Precious making himself more comfortable as they waited.

The fur underneath his fingers was wet from the time they’d spent in the snow, and strands of it clung to his skin with each passing swipe. Some might have found it unpleasant, but it was a small price to pay for what he had received. Companionship. A tentative friendship. Play. Who had played with Luo Binghe after his mother died? No one in the sect had ever invited him to such things. The disciples chased each other in the summer, peals of laughter heard across the peak, and threw snowballs at each other during winter, playful shouting reaching Luo Binghe’s ears to tell him that once again he had been excluded. Rejected. Denied.

“Thank you,” he murmured, watching as one eye opened to focus on him. “Thank you for the chance to play,” he explained, hoping it would be enough. Precious opened both eyes fully, the endless darkness in them focusing on him completely, flaying him to the bone.

He rubbed behind one large, soft ear, stifling a laugh at the content sigh he heard. The impression he had was that Precious was kind, and playful, and silly. But the way he watched Luo Binghe with eyes too clever for a creature-like demon, the way he took a moment to consider his actions, spoke of something, someone, who was also cunning and independent.

He stroked Precious between the eyes, watching those endless pits close. Luo Binghe valued an intelligent and cunning mind, but the independence was worrying. Independence meant that one day Luo Binghe might wake up and find Precious gone.

The worry twisted in him like a snake, coiling around his insides. He knew Xin Mo influenced the worst of his feelings, always pushing them to the extreme, but he couldn’t help but want. He wanted someone to talk to, someone who was his. Someone on his side to confide in. Despite having Mobei-jun as a friend, despite the many wives he had accumulated, he was still missing something, someone who saw him as he wanted to be seen.

Maybe a demon wolf wouldn’t be what filled the void, but he felt connected to Precious despite how short of a time they’ve known each other. Luo Binghe wasn’t entirely sure, but he was confident that Precious understood him and his mood. The face lick, the hand lick, and the playful behavior had all been accurate responses to his mood. And Precious allowing Luo Binghe to take care of him, to bandage him and feed him, to keep him company, made Luo Binghe feel useful, at ease, made him feel needed. If Precious left, Luo Binghe knew it would hurt but he would survive, but still, the thought made him ache.

If Precious left, Luo Binghe would survive, but he didn’t want to have to endure it. Cupping the wolf’s head in his hands, staring down at the beast who currently depended on him, it was hard to think why he would have to be put in such a position.

Didn’t Precious have it good by his side? Couldn’t Luo Binghe provide whatever Precious needed? His gaze dropped to the injured leg, now almost completely healed. Caught and starving, Precious had been close to death when Luo Binghe had found him. It would be best for him if he stayed with Luo Binghe and let him take care of him.

As if sensing his thoughts, Precious lifted his head to stare at Luo Binghe, blinking slowly up at him, tail thumping against the floor.

“You’re my good boy,” Luo Binghe said and leaned down to press their heads together. “My good, beautiful boy,” he murmured. The tail thumbed twice, stopping abruptly as if Precious caught himself.

A snort drew his gaze to Sha Hualing, who entered the room once she had his attention. Her silver jewelry jingled with every step as she approached him. “Beautiful? You’ve spent too much time with your ugly wives if you think that thing is beautiful.” Her tone was teasing, but it couldn’t hide the jealousy of her words.

He smiled at her as he continued to pet Precious, ignoring the double insult. “What brings my wife here so early? It’s a long way from your palace.” Not only was it far from her palace, usually his wives waited for him to visit them, they knew better than to seek him out.

With a smile tugging on her lips she sat down on his thighs, her knee narrowly missing Precious, who pulled away without a sound. “Ling-er missed her husband. It’s been so long since he visited her.” She spoke lightly, her tone too innocent to be sincere.

Her explanation was weak, but he knew if she was here for something important he would find out sooner or later. With her arms so eagerly clinging to his shoulders, there was more pressing issues to attend. He wrapped his arms around her waist, letting the closeness fan the flames of his interest.

Her lips were soft against his as they shared a kiss, her skin smooth underneath his hands. His hands roamed her body, tugging off each red veil and black strap until she was naked on his lap, her soft hands eagerly ridding him off his robes. When he looked up, they were alone, the servants all gone without a word.

It was an easy feat to get his legs underneath him and lift her up, and he held her with one arm as he undid his pants, stepping out of them before getting into the tub. She sighed as he sat down, appreciating the warm water almost as much as he did.

They washed each other with inquisitive touches, and she was wet and slippery in his grip, teasing and sweet in a way she only was with him. They spilled the bathwater everywhere as they explored each other, his hands caressing every part of her he could reach.

Lifting herself off him, she turned around and bent over, bracing herself against the edge of the tub. He didn’t need another invitation, and without hesitation he pressed into her, littering her neck and back with kisses as he entered her.

His fingers trailed along her side to her stomach, following an invisible trail down to where she was swollen and aching for his touch. It made him groan into the nape of her neck, hit by another wave of arousal at the evidence of her want for him. As much as he loved f*cking his wives, feeling them tight around him, he loved knowing they wanted him. Loved knowing he made them feel good.

He knew how to f*ck each of his wives, knew how to tailor each tryst to their liking, no matter what they were in the mood for. They never really asked, never really demanded, but he always made it his mission to learn what they liked.

And as Sha Hualing reached her peak for the second time, he held himself back, thrusting slowly onto her to keep her going, to make sure she would reach her peak a third time.

A movement at the corner of his eye caught his attention, and he caught Precious standing out on the balcony just as the wolf turned his head away from them. Luo Binghe had forgotten about him in the heat of the moment, a twinge of upset tugging at him at the sight of Precious leaving.

Forcing his attention back to Sha Hualing, he fondled her breasts lazily as she gathered herself, pinching her lightly as he gradually sped up his movements, listening to the hitch in her breath as the punched out little groans turned to moans.

He stroked across her back with one wet hand, leaving a trail of water droplets crisscrossed across her back. Without thought he let his fingers trace an unfamiliar pattern down the small of her back, trailing off down her backside with an appreciative hum. The droplets glistened in the light of the fire, and as they dripped down to gather at the small of her back, he lost whatever thought was trying to make itself known.

Shaking his head to clear his mind, he changed his stance and angled deeper, groaning as she tightened around him as she fell apart a third time. He followed her over the edge, kissing her shoulder as he came down from his high.

A satisfied sigh rumbled through him, as he got out of the tub, the sentiment echoed by Sha Hualing as he helped dry her off.

“Ling-er thanks her husband for his attention,” she said, a teasing tone to her voice that couldn’t cover for the intense look she was giving him.

He regarded her with a smile, before leaning over to kiss her forehead. First Shi Xingwu had visited, wanting to know of his decision, and now Sha Hualing visited, seemingly for no reason.

“This husband is always happy to see Hualing,” he said without looking at her, eyes on the opening in the balcony doors.

Her fingers caressed the muscles on his chest, tracing a path downwards with interest. “Happy enough to go again?”

A huff came from the balcony, and Luo Binghe took hold of her hand before it could reach its target. “Not right now. I have a meeting to attend to.”

A pout formed on her lips and he leaned down to kiss it away, eyes still searching for a glimpse of Precious outside. “If the meeting doesn’t go well, we might have to fight the Western Kingdom.” Her face lit up at his words, the pouting gone as she contemplated the potential battle.

He knew she worked hard as the Demon Saintess to keep his new subjects satisfied under his rule. And where Mobei-jun gave good advice on enemies who depended more on strength over intelligence, Sha Hualing gave good advice on how to outsmart his more resourceful enemies.

When he had met up with Sha Hualing again, he had looked at her and thought maybe. She was smart, cunning, independent. So many of the things he wanted in a wife. So, he had hoped that maybe she would be enough for him and Xin Mo.

But while he wanted someone who would always stay by his side, her dedication had quickly proven to be too intense. Her devotion was laced with venom and vicious jealousy. None of his wives demanded to be the only one, but she went out of her way to hurt any wife she felt got too much of his attention. She was part of the reason most of his wives were kept away from each other, to keep them unable of keeping track of where he went and who he visited.

Thinking about it, that might be why she was there. If she had somehow found out that Shi Xingwu had visited his rooms, a place he tried his best to keep his wives away from, she might be there out of jealousy.

“I’ll let you know after my meeting,” he told her, pulling on his pants as she got dressed.

He walked over to the balcony doors, wondering what Precious was up to. Sha Hualing stopped him, hand entwining with his and holding him back. Impatience nibbled at his heels, but he pushed it down, giving her a smile.

“I’ll hold you to it,” she replied, giving him a kiss before leaving.

The moment she was out of his sight, Luo Binghe immediately turned to the balcony, only to find it empty. Urgency gripped him, forcing him barefoot into the snow, searching for Precious. “Sweetheart?” he called, looking around for clues to where he might have gone.

A movement caught his eye as a heap of snow shifted. Slowly he walked over, crouching down to brush away some of the snow. As the wolf’s head was revealed, Luo Binghe sighed a sigh of relief. The panic he had felt receded, and in its place came clarity in all its might, possessive and consuming. It washed over him and he let it, embracing the certainty that Precious belonged here with him.

Precious had curled up into a ball, covering himself with a layer of snow. As Luo Binghe brushed the snow away, his eyes opened into slits to watch him for a moment before his tail came up to cover them, brushing more snow onto his face.

Perhaps Luo Binghe had offended his sensibilities with his actions. If that was the case, Luo Binghe would make sure to keep their room a wife-free zone from now on. He would make sure they remembered to stay away.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t invite her.” It was a strange experience, feeling like he had to defend himself to an animal. Not even his wives had received apologies for what he did with other women.

There was a huff from the heap of snow, and Luo Binghe couldn’t chase away the smile forming in the face of the wolf’s antics.

“Maybe you don’t like my wives. Maybe-” he carefully flicked a dark, soft ear, “-you’re jealous?” It wouldn’t be the first time an animal got jealous around him, just like Walnut who would try to bite any other horse he dared to ride.

The tail shifted to allow Precious to stare at him, disbelief and disdain radiating from him without having to say a word. It reminded Luo Binghe of how Shen Qingqiu would often look at him, except his stares had always been far more hostile.

“Don’t worry, you’re still my good boy.” Luo Binghe reached out, watching with amusem*nt as Precious burrowed further into the snow.

He hummed, making a show of thinking things over. “I was going to give you a nice bath and some food, and then take you with me to my meeting. Unless you want to stay out here?”

That gained him a favorable reaction. Precious sighed once, like it pained him to forgive Luo Binghe, and rose from the snow to slink back inside. He stopped at the balcony doors, staring back at Luo Binghe as if to say ‘Well, are you coming, you idiot?' and Luo Binghe was helpless to do anything but obey.

The water in the smaller tub was still pleasantly warm, and Luo Binghe carefully lifted Precious into it. The wolf sank into the water, submerging its head twice before Luo Binghe was allowed to start washing him.

As Luo Binghe poured water onto him, Precious held himself still, stoic and regal despite being soaking wet, his ribs still on stark display. As the first layer of soap and dirt was washed away with more warm water, Precious sighed, his tail lazily moving back and forth.

Not for the first time, Luo Binghe wondered if Precious had been an unlucky servant, subjected to his lord’s cruel experiments. If there was an actual person hiding underneath the dark fur and sharp teeth.

What kind of person would Precious have been? Subservient and cowering like so many of the castle’s servants Luo Binghe had met? But the way Precious had attacked Shi Xingwu, the way he had seemed right at home on the platform next to his throne, the way Precious knew how to navigate Luo Binghe’s mood, spoke of someone who was used to taking action, someone who knew how to observe and act accordingly.

He could ask. Could turn his head away from where he was scrubbing a dirty flank and ask. Who are you? But each and every time the question tried to spring free it died a merciless death, ruthlessly crushed underneath the boot of Luo Binghe’s selfishness. Because, if Precious was a person, an innocent being, who would Luo Binghe be to keep him?

Luo Binghe took prisoners, occasionally. He fought and he killed others, taking lives without a second thought, and never had he regretted anything he’d done. But when he thought about it, watching as dirt loosened from the fur underneath his hands, was it selfishness or cowardice that kept him from asking? Because if he never asked, he would never get an unfavorable answer. And if he never got an answer, he would never have to face the question; would he let Precious go if he was a person?

Hiding his thoughts at the back of his mind for later, he moved around Precious, happy to let him stay where he was. As he reached the back legs he had to lean over, pushing the wolf’s head almost into his armpit in order to reach the tail. A soft sniff came from Precious, like he was trying to smell him without being noticed. Luo Binghe wondered if he smelled like flowers from the bath, or like Sha Hualing and sex, and if it offended his guest.

When the water finally came away clean, Luo Binghe lifted Precious out of the water and carefully rubbed him dry by the fireplace. Once he deemed him sufficiently dry, he got a sturdy stone comb and set out to remove any knots.

“I can’t take you to an official meeting and have you look horrible, can I?” Luo Binghe said as Precious eyed the comb warily.

As gently as he could he combed through the fur, easing out the knots without hurting Precious. He called on all his limited experience combing hair, mostly from combing Ning Yingying’s hair, and made sure to be as gentle as he could.

Once it was done, he leaned back, admiring the sigh in front of him. Precious looked like a new wolf, his fur gleaming in the light. With his fur combed out and growing in just as fast as he was healing, he looked bigger and stronger than he currently was, but Luo Binghe knew it was just a matter of time before the regular meals would make him fill out. Would make him big and strong, like he should be.

Precious padded over to the nearest mirror, and Luo Binghe could almost see the mental change happen as the he looked at himself in the mirror. The happiness he had felt from earlier seemed to double, and his tail rose a little, his head held higher. Regret filled him. Had he known Precious had been feeling ashamed of how he looked he would have cleaned him up sooner.

Luo Binghe crawled over to where Precious was standing in front of the mirror, sitting down next to him to admire him in the reflection. “That’s you. You’re that handsome, beautiful creature. Look at you, so gorgeous.”

Precious turned just a fraction, enough to lick him across the side of his face. It seemed Luo Binghe wasn’t the only one surprised at the action, as Precious startled, turning his head away so fast Luo Binghe worried about his neck.

Luo Binghe buried his face into the thick fur, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. “You’re a good boy,” he said, and got up, sparing Precious from any more embarrassing reactions.

They ate together in silence, Luo Binghe still handfeeding him to strengthen the bond and let his mind drift to Shen Qingqiu. He wondered where he was. Who had taught him how to escape from Luo Binghe’s dreamscape?

Shen Qingqiu looked better than the last time he had seen him, which was a relief. As long as Shen Qingqiu was alive, Luo Binghe could get him back. The next time they met he would have to try harder to be nice to him. It had been his plan already, but the scars had taken him by surprise. He remembered seeing them the first time they met in the dreamscape, but he had been too affected by Xin Mo to think, too angry about the escape to really take notice.

Who had dared to raise a whip against Shen Qingqiu? When had it happened? Luo Binghe thought he knew all he wanted to know about Shen Qingqiu, so why did it feel like it mattered?

The next time he would try to have an actual conversation with him. Would try to make him see reason. Would promise him anything if it meant Shen Qingqiu was found. Promises could be broken, but if something happened to Shen Qingqiu out there, Luo Binghe wouldn’t know until it was too late.

Precious looked up at him with his dark eyes, gazing at him like he could see his soul. “Are you ready for a little adventure?” His tail thumped twice, in sync with Luo Binghe’s heart.

Perhaps he could go out to the river after his meeting and bring Precious with him. Maybe with his help, Shen Qingqiu would be found.

Chapter 12: The Distant War

Chapter Text

Shen Qingqiu watched as Luo Binghe dithered in front of the bed, tugging on the outfit the servants had laid out for him. Dithered. Hesitated. Wavered. It was out of character and he found it hilarious, curling up in front of the fire to silently laugh at Luo Binghe behind his back.

It served him right for what he had exposed Shen Qingqiu to! He had looked away as Sha Hualing had gotten undressed, had at first tried to keep his head turned away to give her privacy and to shield himself from the unpleasant scene about to take place in front of him.

He had always thought of Luo Binghe as a brute. More beast than man. Had thought he would be the same in such situations, so curiosity got the best of him when the sounds Sha Hualing made were sweet and appreciative.

His discomfort at seeing Luo Binghe in such a compromising situation had lost to his curiosity, and he had turned his head just a fraction, just enough to watch with one eye barely opened. The fleeting thought of appreciation that had popped up had filled him with self-loathing, had sent him running to the balcony, considering his options.

Shen Qingqiu had always known there was something wrong with him. The infatuation and fascination his peers felt never reached him. From the moment he had entered the sect he had been surrounded by peerless beauties, from his martial siblings to the women at the Warm Red Pavilion, yet their beautiful looks had merely struck him as normal, as just another fact of life.

In that moment, seeing Luo Binghe towering behind Sha Hualing, his great, hulking form dwarfing her as she was bent over, his hands encompassing her waist, yet seemingly caring, focused on her pleasure, struck a chord in Shen Qingqiu he hadn’t known had been waiting to be discovered.

To have a powerful companion, and be the only one they treated kindly? To be the one they would never hurt? The thought had sent him right into the snow, hiding himself from both his shame and the disgraceful scenes inside the room.

As Luo Binghe had washed him, he had smelled like Sha Hualing and the deed they had just done, reminding Shen Qingqiu how easily his wives left their scent on Luo Binghe. How such beasts could never belong to one person alone. And no one had ever wanted to belong to Shen Qingqiu.

While Shen Qingqiu watched, Luo Binghe donned a black outer robe embroidered with a faint red swirling pattern around the hem and the cuffs, the open neckline plunging deep enough to expose his bellybutton, immodest even for Luo Binghe’s standards. “What do you think, Precious?” He turned in a circle as he tightened his belt, cinching his waist to create a pleasant contrast to his broad shoulders.

Luo Binghe left his arms wide open, waiting for Shen Qingqiu’s judgement. His skin was golden in the light, reminding Shen Qingqiu of what he had just seen, Luo Binghe’s figure, wet and glistening in the firelight as he moved behind Sha Hualing. Why did the thought still linger?

Shen Qingqiu tilted his head and got up, stretching before he padded over. He supposed Luo Binghe didn’t look horrible in his robes, and he had been very generous with his compliments after bathing Shen Qingqiu. He wagged his tail twice in appreciation, Luo Binghe had earned that much.

“I haven’t met Hou-jun before. Apparently, he’s a gentler leader than what’s common in the Demon Realm,” Luo Binghe said while straightening his sleeves.

It meant Shen Qingqiu had one up on Luo Binghe. He had met Hou-jun once, almost three years after the Immortal Alliance Conference. Curiosity and a persistent morbidity had pushed him to travel to the borderlands, searching for hands-on knowledge of demons. And hands-on it had gotten. He wondered how Luo Binghe would deal with that knowledge if it came up.

“No biting, alright? Unless necessary. Then you have my permission to go for the throat,” Luo Binghe said, reaching down and ruffling his fur in a way he had come to enjoy. Like Shen Qingqiu needed permission. But it was nice to know he had permission, if it ever became necessary to take Luo Binghe down.

Luo Binghe swung his sword, a shimmering rift appearing in front of them, and without a word he guided Shen Qingqiu through it. They ended up on a hill not too far from the city entrance, a high, pale stonewall surrounding the city completely. A cool breeze rustled the grass around them, so different from the cold climate they came from. From their vantage point Shen Qingqiu could look into the city, watching the people flitter about. From what he could tell the city had a calm atmosphere to it, so different to the few other places he had been in the Demon Realm.

“Tongrao isn’t the Western Kingdom’s biggest city, but due to its location it’s the kingdom’s center of power.” Luo Binghe explained as he led the way down the hill, turning his head just enough to make sure Shen Qingqiu was following him.

The guards at the gate appeared to know Luo Binghe was coming, greeting him with a bow and gesturing for Luo Binghe to enter without any hesitation. Shen Qingqiu let his gaze flitter from the sights in the city to Luo Binghe, watching as Luo Binghe strode through the main street with a smile on his face.

The demons around them had softer features than Shen Qingqiu was used to seeing. They had bigger eyes and rounder cheeks, their robes soft blue and pink. It was a stark contrast to the sharper, handsomer features of demons such as Luo Binghe, Mobei-jun and Sha Hualing.

Most of the demons jingled as they walked by, bracelets and silvery chains heavy on their bodies. Even the children had little silver belts with tiny charms that created jingling melodies as they ran down the streets.

He watched as Luo Binghe barely looked around, yet he seemed aware of everything going on around them. Lou Binghe didn’t flinch at any loud noise or shout, didn’t deem it necessary to investigate the unfamiliar sounds of the city. He seemed to be completely aware of his surroundings, or he was good at faking it. Luo Binghe took one half step to the side right before a young child came running past him from behind.

They both watched as the child jumped into the arms of a woman, laughing in joy as she spun them both around in dizzying circles.

“It would be a shame, wouldn’t it, if war was brought to their gate.” Luo Binghe spoke in a low tone just high enough for Shen Qingqiu to hear over the noises.

The way Luo Binghe spoke was casual, like he had done it all before. Shen Qingqiu was familiar with the ruthlessness that was needed for bloodshed. He knew that sacrifices were needed to create peace, but he preferred to shed the blood of the leaders who instigated the conflicts, and not the commoners who were forced to fight. How much blood would Luo Binghe need to spill before he reached his goal? How willing was Luo Binghe to spill said blood?

Luo Binghe looked down, letting his fingers run along Shen Qingqiu’s back. “Don’t worry,” he said, looking up at the palace as they reached the stairs. “I always get what I want.”

And right there and then, Shen Qingqiu believed him. As they reached the palace entrance and were escorted inside, Shen Qingqiu still felt the sincerity in Luo Binghe’s words. Luo Binghe got the acceptance and recognition he always wanted. The wives, the kingdoms, the victories. He got the revenge he desired, grinding Shen Qingqiu into the dirt. Nothing Luo Binghe wanted was denied him. So where did that leave Shen Qingqiu the escapee?

He would still try to escape, would still take the first chance he got, but pessimism washed over him as they entered the belly of the palace. If it came down to it, he couldn’t hesitate. If his life was on the line, Luo Binghe’s life would have to be ended, one way or another. He would have to find some time alone and work out his abilities and his limitations. He would have to prepare to fight the man who always got what he wanted.

They were led into a meeting room, elegantly decorated in soft, white colors and pale wood furniture. Soft, white carpets covered most of the cold stone floors, and at the end of the room a tall man stood with his back to them.

The man turned around, a jar of wine in one hand and two cups in the other, a smile tugging on his lips. He was a handsome, soft featured man, just as Shen Qingqiu remembered him. He wore pale green and blue robes split open even further than Luo Binghe’s robes, and long, delicate silver chains ran from a necklace down inside his robes to wrap around his waist.

“Luo Binghe,” he said, filling the air with sounds of jewelry jingling as he gestured for Luo Binghe to take a seat on a pale wooden sofa. “What an honor to finally meet you.”

“Hou-jun, the honor is mine,” Luo Binghe said as he sat down, face open and eyes full of a warmth Shen Qingqiu could easily tell was fake. He took the opportunity given to him as an animal to ignore the protocol of sitting down, instead walking around room looking for anything interesting while keeping an eye on the two men.

Hou-jun sat down opposite of Luo Binghe, the movement revealing the long slits of his robes, exposing a shocking amount of skin up to the middle of his thighs. Shen Qingqiu could see Luo Binghe, saw how his face didn’t show a reaction, saw the quick movement of his eyes.

Hou-jun’s answering smile was a soft little thing, a barely there tug at the corner of his lips that could instantly make most forget about the intelligence hiding in his eyes. He was exactly as Shen Qingqiu remembered him, except for a pale line across his left cheek.

Servants entered the room and one poured them tea, the heavy, dark scent of the unfamiliar herbal blend filled the room almost immediately. The servant made a show of staring pointedly at the wine already on the table. “Yes, thank you, Soft Breeze,” Hou-jun said, dismissing his servants with a soft laugh.

“We’ll definitely have some tea first.” He winked at Luo Binghe, who chuckled. It was an odd sound, seemingly normal, but to Shen Qingqiu it was entirely false. He now knew what Luo Binghe sounded like when he was in a mood to chuckle, knew the odd scraping sound of it, the rough tone revealing how unfamiliar Luo Binghe was to such spontaneous expressions of amusem*nt. This, however, was smooth and low, confident and humoring. Entirely fake.

“When I got your letter I was surprised. What brings the great Junshang to my kingdom in the middle of our negotiations?”

Luo Binghe took his time with the tea, letting silence fill the air before speaking. “There have been reports that your army is preparing to move to the border.”

Hou-jun’s smile grew smaller. “Is that why you’ve mobilized your troops?”

Luo Binghe said nothing, instead he sipped his tea, letting silence answer for him. Hou-jun sighed dramatically, chains tinkering as his shoulders lifted and fell. “We’re not preparing for an act of aggression, we’re preparing for an invasion. We’ve heard rumors that called for us to prepare.”

Shen Qingqiu padded over to a small desk by a large window, most likely used for Hou-jun’s personal affairs. The scent of plum blossoms filled his nose as he passed a half closed drawer. The scent was faint, and would have been hard to notice even over the fragrant tea filling the room, but it was still noticeable to him, albeit only faintly. He peered into the drawer, spotting a folded up letter.

Luo Binghe busied himself with sipping the tea, watching Hou-jun with a curiosity that was only partly faked. “Rumors such as?”

Shen Qingqiu padded closer, watching Hou-jun as he spoke. “That Junshang has grown tired of diplomacy. That you’re preparing to let the Eastern Hold take our kingdom after you’ve conquered us.”

Luo Binghe put his empty cup down with a sigh verging on disappointed. “And instead of taking such concerns to me, you decided to act on your own?”

Hou-jun folded one leg over the other, exposing more of his pale skin. His feet were bare, and the one now elevated had little rings adorning the toes. Shen Qingqiu watched Luo Binghe’s eyes dip, a smile tugging on his lips. An urge to leap over and push Luo Binghe to the ground made itself known deep within him.

“What use is there to ask the tiger not to attack?” Hou-jun flipped his hair back with a graceful movement, exposing his neck. The urge to leap grew stronger, now directed at Hou-jun. He wondered what Luo Binghe would say if Shen Qingqiu buried his teeth in the neck that was blatantly begging for attention.

Shen Qingqiu huffed and padded over to sit next to Luo Binghe. An uninvited sense of smugness filled him as Luo Binghe’s attention fell on him, his strong fingers weaving through his fur.

Luo Binghe hummed in agreement, leaning forward to refill his cup as he spoke. “Your citizens are happy and alive. I would like for them to stay that way.”

“Then we have the same goal,” Hou-jun replied.

“The terms we’ve already agreed on still stand. I know you haven’t asked, but I would like for you and your council to remain in your positions. You’ll do as you’ve always done, just under my command.”

“That could be agreeable.” The elevated foot swung back and forth, the chiming sound of the anklets burying itself into Shen Qingqiu’s ears until he had to fight the urge not to rip the leg straight off. He wondered where the homicidal urges came from, if Hou-jun registered as a threat somewhere in his wolflike brain.

“I’m glad.” Luo Binghe’s tone was just a touch sardonic. His attention was still on Shen Qingqiu, hand petting him gently.

Understanding his defeat, Hou-Jun leaned back, one finger tracing the lip of his cup. “There is something, though.”

Luo Binghe lifted one eyebrow. “What’s that?”

“I once met your former master, Peak Lord Shen. A couple of years ago I had the pleasure of meeting him at the borderlands. Our paths crossed as he came from our side.” His eyes were on Luo Binghe’s face, watching for any reaction.

“Really?” Luo Binghe’s expression was blank, bordering on bored, but Shen Qingqiu could see his grip tightening around his cup.

“Mhm. I heard a rumor you’re holding him prisoner?” Shen Qingqiu looked up at Luo Binghe at the information. Who had known? Who had dared let it slip that Luo Binghe had imprisoned Shen Qingqiu?

Luo Binghe’s smile was apologetic. If he was as curious as Shen Qingqiu he didn’t let it show. “He’s not my prisoner.”

“Really? Is he’s a guest then?” His voice was hopeful, a smile teasing his lips.

“Shen Qingqiu is gone,” Luo Binghe said and twisted the meaning of the words with a tone of finality. If only I was truly gone, Shen Qingqiu thought. How easy life would be.

“What a shame,” Hou-jun said, his lips forming a soft pout for just a moment.

There was a sharpness to Luo Binghe’s eyes as he spoke. “Why is that a shame?”

“He was quite clever. We swapped knowledge, among other things.” His lips curled sweetly, as if he was remembering their meeting fondly. “He had a sharp tongue and an even sharper sword.” Hou-jun touched the scar on his cheek.

“You fought?” Luo Binghe’s tone was skeptical. Did he doubt Shen Qingqiu would have managed to successfully beat a demon like Hou-jun?

“I’ll admit that I appreciated both his mind and his face. In my recklessness I fell back on the tradition of bridal kidnapping. Obviously, it wasn’t successful.” Hou-jun’s laugh at the end of his words was self-deprecating.

“You tried to kidnap Shen Qingqiu? To marry him?” Luo Binghe’s tone turned even more skeptical. Did he doubt anyone would fight for Shen Qingqiu?

“Yes. I was hoping you had him, and that we could negotiate something along those lines.” He spoke so casual, like Shen Qingqiu was a bargaining chip. It made him want to rip his throat out even more.

Luo Binghe’s lips curled into a sneer, hand heavy but gentle on Shen Qingqiu’s head. “Shen Qingqiu is gone. Even if he wasn’t, I wouldn’t let you have him.”

Hou-jun co*cked his head, soft eyes staring right at Luo Binghe. “My apologies. I wasn’t aware you had been hoping to make him your mate.”

“I what?” For a moment Luo Binghe’s imposing aura disappeared, too surprised to keep calm.

Hou-jun’s lips curled up at one side, eyes glinting in the light as if Luo Binghe had said something interesting. “As I’m sure you’re now aware, demonic culture allows for quite harsh treatment of others. How many of your foes have you beaten in battle before turning them into your allies, your advisors? How many demonic relationships haven’t started with the spilling of blood? We value mates who prove themselves resilient. Maybe it didn’t cross your mind, and if so, I apologize. I forgot you’re only half-demon. Human relationships are far softer than we’re used to.”

The last words felt like an insult even to Shen Qingqiu, but Luo Binghe’s face was once again blank. “Shen Qingqiu had me whipped and beaten from the moment I became his disciple. There’s nothing soft about our relationship.” As he spoke, his fingers scratched lightly behind Shen Qingqiu’s ears, tugging carefully at his fur.

A look of contemplation settled on Hou-jun’s face. “I apologize for my misinterpretation.”

Luo Binghe waved the apology away. “If that’s all, the negotiations can continue with my advisors.” His words were polite, but Shen Qingqiu could hear how he wanted to end the conversation and leave.

“That’s all. Please take this before you go. It seemed like you enjoyed our regional tea.” He handed over a gold-threaded pouch to Luo Binghe, the heavy herbal scent wafting from it as it changed hands.

“Thank you.” Luo Binghe took the gift graciously, the blankness on his face morphing into a charming smile that to Shen Qingqiu was entirely fake.

“Safe travels.” Hou-jun saw them off with a wave, eyes sharp on Luo Binghe’s retreating back.

Luo Binghe waited until they were in an alley alone before swinging Xin Mo and guiding them back into his bedroom, impatience in every line of his body.

The moment the rift behind them closed, Luo Binghe swung Xin Mo again, this time throwing it forwards and embedding it into the furthest wall with a loud clang. Shen Qingqiu froze, the only sound in the room was the sound of little bits of wall crumbling and falling to the floor.

Luo Binghe took a couple of steps forward, his hands clenching at his side, before turning towards Shen Qingqiu. His eyes were large and dark, shining red like the demon mark on his forehead. “If he thinks he can get his hands on Shen Qingqiu, he’s mistaken. If his hands ever come close to him I’ll cut them off and feed them to him.”

His lips twisted, curling up into a sneer crueler than his words. “He wants Shen Qingqiu? Who would want him? There’s nothing to get from him but a sharp tongue and cruel words. To want someone like that would make Hou-jun a lover of being miserable.”

His laugh was sharp, clearly amused by his thoughts. “Maybe that’s it? To be with Shen Qingqiu, to bed him, would certainly make anyone miserable. Could you imagine?”

Shen Qingqiu had never wanted to be in a relationship, but to have his worth as a partner so easily mocked stung. He would never treat a lover like that, or so he liked to believe. Anyone who ever got close to him was met with his well-known unapproachable demeanor, but he didn’t see himself acting that way with someone he wanted to be with.

“And for someone to-, to-, to push him down? He practically cried when I did it, and I didn’t even have those intentions. The fact that he thought I did is insulting!” Luo Binghe grimaced at his last words, huffing them out in anger.

Luo Binghe, please stop! Shen Qingqiu knew he wasn’t anyone’s ideal partner, and Luo Binghe would have to be out of his mind to think otherwise due to their past, but still. Not even he could listen to his undesirability with a straight face.

Yes, he was mean. Yes, he was cruel. But did everyone assume he would be so with a partner of his choosing? Or did they all think he would end up in a relationship he was displeased with, if he ever even had a relationship?

Luo Binghe stomped over to Xin Mo and pulled the sword out of the wall. “We’re going to go find him. And then I’ll make sure he knows he can never escape me.”

His eyes darkened further as his grip on Xin Mo tightened. Shen Qingqiu hesitated for a moment, unsure if it was a good idea to stay close to Luo Binghe while he was in such a volatile state, but then Luo Binghe’s grip on Xin Mo loosened and he crouched down, hand extended towards Shen Qingqiu.

Luo Binghe closed his eyes and shook his head, and when his eyes opened again, they were softer and clearer. “I hope I didn’t scare you. I won’t hurt you.”

Shen Qingqiu had no choice but to walk over, allowing Luo Binghe to pet his head. The anger directed at someone just for being interested in him was surprising, but maybe it shouldn’t have been. Luo Binghe had made the whole Human Realm think he was dead, just so he could keep Shen Qingqiu to himself. He isolated him to an almost jealously degree, allowing only a few guards to see to him in Luo Binghe’s absence.

Perhaps he could use it to his advantage if they met again. He would have to consider his words and actions carefully if they did. It would be best to not meet Luo Binghe face to face, but as the beast opened a rift in front of them, Shen Qingqiu knew that luck was never on his side.

Chapter 13: Changing Behavior

Chapter Text

The light of the sun bounced of the snow, threatening to blind anyone who foolishly looked at it too long. Even with spring fast approaching it was cold enough that every breath crystallized in the air, forming miniature clouds that dissolved into nothingness. It would have been beautiful if it wasn’t the scene of a hunt. His hunt.

Mobei-jun waited for them by the riverbed, close to where Shen Qingqiu had desperately clawed his way to solid ground. His gaze was on the ground next to him, but it lifted as they came closer, his eyes tracking Shen Qingqiu’s movement as he padded next to Luo Binghe. Next to Mobei-jun was a cowering man, whose familiar form almost made Shen Qingqiu stumble. It was hard to appear disinterested as Shang Qinghua came into view. He was shivering in a thin robe next to Mobei-jun, looking miserable in the cold weather.

Luo Binghe gestured to Shang Qinghua, “You brought your little dog?”

Mobei-jun looked up from Shen Qingqiu. “You brought yours.”

Shang Qinghua shrank down further under their words, and even though Shen Qingqiu had little care to spare for the snake, he remembered how miserable he himself had been when exposed to the cold climate. The memory almost made him shiver in sympathy.

“He might be of some use. He knows more about Shen Qingqiu than we do,” Mobei-jun said. “We surveyed the area while we waited.”

Shang Qinghua’s eyes darted from Mobei-jun to Luo Binghe before speaking up. “The area is full of resentful energy,” he said, gesturing around them, “but it’s strangely reduced here.” He pointed to a wide area by the riverbed.

“This was where I found the robe,” Luo Binghe commented.

Shen Qingqiu looked around. He couldn’t remember the precise place he had been when he transformed, only that it had been near the river. At the time he hadn’t felt any spiritual energy, but he wouldn’t have, not with his broken core. Now, he could pick up the faint trace of demonic energy coming from the area, thrumming through him like a faint chord lingering in the air.

Luo Binghe gave the river a look of consideration. “One of the surviving servants told me that the river was used to dump unsuccessful experiments into, dead or alive.”

Shang Qinghua bowed his head, eyes firmly fixed on the ground. “Resentful energy builds up quickly if there’s foundation for it,” he said, words tripping out of his mouth. “It might have found a host in Shen Qingqiu if he was weak enough, giving him enough energy to escape. Or-,” his words trailed of, mouth closing into a thin line.

“Or what?” Luo Binghe asked.

“Depending on his health at the time, he might not be alive.” Shang Qinghua cowered at his own words. Shen Qingqiu could see how the nail of his thumb jabbed at his fingers, over and over again. A pang of sympathy he had never felt for Shang Qinghua before filled him and he padded over under the disguise of sniffing the hem of his robes.

Luo Binghe watched as Shen Qingqiu moved away, lips set in a hard line. “Impossible.”

“How so?” Shang Qinghua’s breath caught as Shen Qingqiu leaned against him. His presence wouldn’t offer much warmth, but it was all he had. Slowly, Shang Qinghua’s trembling hand came down to rest on his shoulders.

“Because, little traitor, I have met him in the dreamscape,” he said, sounding sure of himself.

Shen Qingqiu heard the sharp intake of breath, felt Shang Qinghua’s trembling grow stronger. “Lingering spirits can enter certain dreamscapes, your lordship.”

Please, Shen Qingqiu thought, please think I’m dead and lay the thought of me to rest.

For a moment Luo Binghe looked stunned, like the possibility hadn’t struck him. “No. I would have known.”

“Would you?” Shan Qinghua’s words were spoken softly and his gaze was still low, but Shen Qingqiu could feel his eyes on him.

Choosing to ignore him, Luo Binghe turned on his heel and started walking towards the forest. “We’ll go this way and you two can search some more. Precious, come,” he said, and Shen Qingqiu padded after him, playing the obedient pet.

When he caught up with Luo Binghe he turned to look back, watching Shang Qinghua as he watched him, taking in how Mobei-jun stared at both of them in turn.

Shen Qingqiu always looked out for himself first. Had grown out of the childish behavior of protecting others when it would ultimately cause him harm. Hard learned from saving Yue Qingyuan, from helping Liu Qingge, that putting someone else first only brought misery to his door. Helping Yue Qingyuan had earned him the attention of Qiu Jianlou. Trying to help Liu Qingge had caused a misunderstanding he never managed to shake off.

Watching Shang Qinghua shrink underneath Mobei-jun’s attention created similarities he couldn’t dispel. While he never shrank away from Luo Binghe’s torment and met every single cruelty with anger and spite, he would still be willing to bet anything that on the inside, his heart had raced as fast as Shang Qinghua’s. He knew what it was like to be at the complete mercy of someone stronger, someone who held all the power. And while Shang Qinghua shrank down where Shen Qingqiu bit back, in that moment, they weren’t too dissimilar.

“Can you track scents?” Luo Binghe pulled out Shen Qingqiu’s old, dirty robe and waved it underneath his nose. He sniffed it, taking in the smell of sweat, dirt, and desperation. It made him long for another bath immediately.

“You like him?” Luo Binghe said once he moved away, his voice holding an undercurrent of jealousy. He looked like he regretted the words immediately, lips clamped into a thin line.

Shen Qingqiu looked at Luo Binghe as he trotted next to him. Like? He didn’t like any of his martial siblings really, though he tolerated some more than others. Shang Qinghua was definitely at the bottom of his list. He wasn’t fond of Shang Qinghua, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t sympathize with him.

Luo Binghe’s eyes were on him like he expected an actual answer, so he knocked his body into Luo Binghe’s legs hard enough to make him stumble. The fool had to have issues with loneliness since he was feeling threatened by his pet liking someone else.

Luo Binghe grunted at the impact, a smile spreading across his face. “I know you’re my good boy,” he said, hand reaching down to ruffle his fur.

“I just-,” he trailed off, staring into the forest.

He just what? Had a hard time sharing? Couldn’t stand the idea of liking someone, even an animal, and them not favoring him? Couldn’t handle growing fond of someone, only to be left behind for someone else, for another life?

Couldn’t help but grab onto the smallest gesture of kindness, just like Shen Qingqiu had done as a child, until he grew out of it? Luo Binghe should know better. Would know better once Shen Qingqiu escaped and left Luo Binghe behind.

He looked up at Luo Binghe, taking in the way the sunlight and shadows from the trees chased each other across his face as they walked. What would happen to the sliver of kindness in Luo Binghe when Precious was gone?

He put his nose to the ground, taking in the scent of the forest. It wasn’t his problem. He wasn’t responsible for Luo Binghe’s actions. Wasn’t responsible for Luo Binghe caring for Precious. To entertain the idea any further would only bring him misery. Once he was gone Luo Binghe would never be his problem again.

Slowly he circled around Luo Binghe, pretending to be interested in sniffing the ground. When he knew he had Luo Binghe’s attention he made a beeline deeper into the forest.

“You find something?” Luo Binghe’s asked as he followed him closely.

He hadn’t found anything, but Luo Binghe didn’t need to know that. He pretended to follow a trail, determinedly leading them far away from the direction he had actually gone.

If it was true what Shang Qinghua said, then the demonic energy missing from the riverside would be the same energy that had transformed him. And if Luo Binghe had enough time to think, he would put two and two together and come up with a wolflike Shen Qingqiu as the answer.

The weather was turning warmer by the day, and Shen Qingqiu was so close to being able to escape. He just needed Luo Binghe to be ignorant of his identity for a just a little longer. Just long enough for Shen Qingqiu to know he would survive being outside by himself.

So, he put his nose to the ground and pretended to be the animal whose body he inhabited, leading Luo Binghe away from the truth.

“Good job.” Luo Binghe said, trailing close behind him. He kept praising him as Shen Qingqiu led them a straight line through a clearing in the forest, voice warm and encouraging.

“You’re doing great.” Luo Binghe’s compliments were a distraction, his undeserved words a whip against a tender spot inside of him that he had long ago buried.

“Well done,” Luo Binghe said as Shen Qingqiu led them through a rocky patch of terrain. He scrambled up a large rock, his claws sinking into the stone with just a little pressure.

Shen Qingqiu stopped at an icy patch leading up a small hill. His body was still weak, and his mind was exhausted from taking in all the smells of the forest. The night had crept up on them, leaving them almost completely in the dark, and only the moon and his enhanced eyesight let him see where they were going. He circled the area, pretending to have lost the trail.

Luo Binghe sighed in disappointment as Shen Qingqiu trotted up to him, but the hand on his head was gentle. “You did well. Good boy, such a good boy,” Luo Binghe said. The warmth and pride in his voice made Shen Qingqiu feel numb.

“I’ll have someone take it from here.” Luo Binghe swung Xin Mo, his other hand still heavy on Shen Qingqiu’s head.

Luo Binghe brought them back to the castle’s reception hall, where Mobei-jun and Shang Qinghua waited for them.

Luo Binghe gestured to a guard as Shen Qingqiu padded over to where Shang Qinghua was standing by a large fireplace, hands up and hovering close to the fire, no longer shivering from the cold but still looking miserable.

Luo Binghe walked over to them, his eyes going tracking the distance between Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghua. “Did you find anything?”

“No, there was no trace of him,” Mobei-jun answered.

Luo Binghe frowned, eyes on Shang Qinghua who resolutely kept his eyes on the fire. Mobei-jun stepped up to Shang Qinghua and wrapped one hand around his wrist. “We will be going,” he said and tugged on Shang Qinghua’s arm until they were out of sight.

Shen Qingqiu watched them go, hoping for Shang Qinghua’s sake he would be treated kindly.

When they were alone Luo Binghe crouched down, hand ruffling his fur. “What does it say about me, if you took a liking to that little coward so quickly?”

A pout played across his face, betrayed by the teasing glint in his eyes. “My good boy, defender of the weak.” Luo Binghe stood up, gesturing for him to follow. “It’s late and I have a long day tomorrow.”

They walked together back to their bedroom, Luo Binghe’s voice washing over him with all he had to do regarding the Eastern Hold’s leadership ceremony.

“It will take a while, but I should be back by nightfall. Unless I stay the night with Shi Xingwu. We’ll see.” Shen Qingqiu hoped he stayed the night. He could spend several days and nights with his wife, in fact, and leave him alone.

They passed by the Qi Retrieval room, and Shen Qingqiu walked by the stick Luo Binghe seemed hung up on almost without noticing when a sweet smell hit him. He stopped, staring at the stick. He hadn’t given it much thought, automatically dismissing it the moment Luo Binghe showed interest in it. But it had a lingering sickly-sweet smell to it that pulled on his memory.

“Pretty interesting, right?” Luo Binghe commented.

Interesting? Shen Qingqiu’s eyes narrowed in dismay as he realized Luo Binghe had an invaluable amount of the rare Shimmering-Million-Remedies-Tree hanging on his wall as a decoration. Sold in its natural state that amount alone would have financed the entire sect for at least a couple of decades! And Luo Binghe had it on his wall! He sighed at the gods favoring Luo Binghe so blatantly.

“I know, I’m tired too. Want me to carry you?” Luo Binghe opened his arms, and really, who was Shen Qingqiu to say no? He was in fact tired, and the disappointment at seeing another display of Luo Binghe’s luck had knocked the rest of his strength out of him.

He padded over to Luo Binghe, playing the good pet as he was lifted and cooed at. It still amazed him that Luo Binghe could be so gentle, and the casual display of Luo Binghe’s strength didn’t go unnoticed either. Strong, lucky and powerful. Shen Qingqiu sighed again.

“I know, I know,” Luo Binghe murmured as he lowered him down onto the bed. “It’s been a long day for you, so go to sleep.”

Luo Binghe stepped away, taking off his robes before poking at the fireplace until the flames were strong again. Shen Qingqiu fought against his heavy eyelids, watching the warm light dance across Luo Binghe’s face until he fell asleep.

-

The bamboo forest was silent except for the sounds of rustling leaves, the warm breeze tickling Shen Qingqiu’s skin, sweeping his hair up and around his face. Flower petals and red leaves danced around him, hinting at the dreamscape’s changing season.

Strange, that Luo Binghe’s dreams would bring about autumn and not summer like the previous dreams, or winter, the season they actually had. But Shen Qingqiu couldn’t complain. Qing Jing Peak had always been lovely during this time of year. The bamboo stayed green, but the falling leaves from other plants were swept across the peak by the winds, adding a dash of color to even the densest part of the forest.

So, where was the beast? Had he camouflaged himself amongst the bushes, waiting for Shen Qingqiu to walk by before he pounced on him? He eyed his surroundings with suspicion. A healthy dose of paranoia was good when dealing with Luo Binghe, but he had mentioned trying to be nice to Shen Qingqiu. Jumping out from a bush and giving him a heart attack was probably not something Luo Binghe thought was nice.

He picked the direction that would lead him close to his house and started walking without hurry, positive that if Luo Binghe wanted to meet him he would, no matter what Shen Qingqiu actually wanted. His stroll brought him to a clearing, Luo Binghe sitting on a tall, angular boulder with his back to him, his eyes fixed on the direction of Shen Qingqiu’s home.

A piece of him wanted to run, to silently turn around and leave, but he knew Luo Binghe was aware of him, could see it in the way he leaned back in a manner that was too casual, too contrived. There was no choice but to walk up to him, and as he got closer he could see his house through the branches, could see right down into his little garden.

“I used to sit here and watch you with Ning Yingying, imagining being taught by you as she was.” Luo Binghe’s voice held a contemplative note. “Then I grew older, and I sat here imagining all the ways I could take you apart.”

He walked closer, conscious of the way he had to crane his neck to look up at Luo Binghe. “Pleasant,” he said, looking up at Luo Binghe in a way he imagined he would look up at a leopard perching in a three above him. Aware of the natural advantage Luo Binghe already had, wary of the added advantage his elevated position gave him.

Luo Binghe peered down at him, swinging his legs. His pleased expression enhanced as a smile grew on his face. “Yes, it was.”

Luo Binghe beckoned Shen Qingqiu closer with a gesture, smile still tugging on his lips. He took a couple of steps closer, ready to run if Luo Binghe decided to swoop down on him.

“How many ways can you take me apart, Luo Binghe?” he enquired, morbidity forcing him to ask. The wind kicked up again and ruffled his hair. He caught it, tugging it away from his face and held it down by his shoulder with one hand. Luo Binghe looked at him, eyes darting from his growing hair to linger at the still too prominent lines of his collarbone.

“In more ways than you could possibly imagine, Shen Qingqiu,” Luo Binghe answered, watching him with darkened eyes.

Shen Qingqiu stood still, refusing to fidget under Luo Binghe’s judgmental stare as his gaze went lower, taking in the rest of him. A grimace travelled across Luo Binghe’s face, and he found himself clothed again as Luo Binghe looked away. He was back in the disciple robes, this time clean and whole.

He took a step back and froze at the sound of little bells just as Luo Binghe whipped his head back towards him. Looking down he saw several delicate silver chains around his ankles, clearly inspired by Hou-jun’s jewelry, charms and trinkets dangling from each chain.

Luo Binghe recovered first from his surprise, gaze turning sharp. “Do that again.”

“Do what?” Shen Qingqiu hissed, face heating up in mortification.

“Walk.” It was a command, not a suggestion, and Luo Binghe clearly expected to be obeyed.

For a moment he froze. He could deal with embarrassment, he had done so before, but among all his punishments, being humiliated had been the worst. He could take the pain, he could take his reputation being ruined, his name smeared for eternity. The hardest thing to take had been when Luo Binghe brought him low.

Luo Binghe had cut his hair in front of a crowd, had forced him into a kowtow with a boot on his head and had poured tea all over him while the crowd had laughed and cheered, and that had hurt him more than the whip, more than having his arm ripped off.

Even as a street rat, he had pride. He could beg and steal, threaten and hurt, and still he had pride. Even Qiu Jianlou’s treatment hadn’t chipped away at pride. Only Luo Binghe had ever come close to breaking it.

The look on Luo Binghe’s face turned impatient, and he steeled himself. Little bells chimed with every step that brought him closer to Luo Binghe, who broke out into a smile. Every step hurt his pride, until he felt the stirrings of anger lick up his spine.

He reached Luo Binghe, whose smile only fueled the anger growing within him. He should have known better, did normally know better, but in that moment he didn’t care. “Is there so little joy in your life you have to find enjoyment in me?”

Swiftly, Luo Binghe pushed himself off the boulder and navigated his fall to land on Shen Qingqiu. He fell to the ground with a thud, breath knocked out of him by Luo Binghe’s solid weight.

The look on Luo Binghe’s face was not angry as he thought it would be, but elated. A warm hand wrapped around his leg and pulled it towards his chest, and he sputtered at the exposed position it left him in, Luo Binghe pressing up against his most vulnerable places. But Luo Binghe only had eyes on the jewelry around his ankles.

“When I find you I’m going to put a bell on you.” He smiled at the idea, pleased by the thought. “I’ll have you wear it so I can always hear where you are.”

Shen Qingqiu sneered, uselessly struggling against the grip. “What? You can hear all the way down to my cell?”

“If you tell me where you are, I’ll keep you out of that dirty, little cell.” The grip on his ankle flexed playfully.

“Why would I? I’m enjoying my freedom right now.” Luo Binghe’s grip tightened. Shen Qingqiu tsked, pleased at the impotent frustration he could feel radiating from Luo Binghe. “I’ll leave again if you hurt me.”

“Fine,” Luo Binghe said and released Shen Qingqiu’s foot. He lifted himself slightly up, so he was no longer crushing Shen Qingqiu with his weight, but otherwise stayed where he was.

His hand drifted to Shen Qingqiu’s robes, tracing the modestly embroidered hem down his chest. “I met someone you know.”

“Really? How fascinating.” He watched Luo Binghe’s hand carefully, felt the warmth of him seep through the fabric and into his chest.

“He was. Hou-jun told me he met you a few years ago.” Luo Binghe’s tone was casual, bordering on bored. The way he kept his eyes on his own hand betrayed his interest.

Shen Qingqiu stayed silent, watching as a frown appeared on Luo Binghe’s face.

“He told me he tried to kidnap you.” He sounded dismayed at the thought that someone else had almost gotten to Shen Qingqiu before he did.

“He did,” he confirmed, watching the frown deepen.

“You made yourself approachable enough that someone would want to marry you?” He looked like the idea puzzled him, and Shen Qingqiu didn’t know if Luo Binghe was hung up on Shen Qingqiu being approachable or that someone would want to marry him.

“Which part are you struggling with exactly?” He huffed, blowing wayward hairs out of his eyes. Luo Binghe ignored him, reaching up to push the hair away for him. The gentleness of his touch made Shen Qingqiu want to sink his teeth into his throat and never let go. Once again he wondered how much influence the transformation had on his mind, and what was simply human instinct when faced with a threat.

“Both,” Luo Binghe finally answered, eyes wrinkling and one side of his lips turning up mischievously.

“Just because you never had the intelligence needed to have a proper conversation with me doesn’t mean everyone else is lacking in that regard. He happened to be a great conversationalist.” Shen Qingqiu wasn’t lying, and he took pleasure in watching Luo Binghe clench his jaw at his words, though he didn’t lose his smile. Hou-jun had been a good conversationalist. It was just a shame about the whole kidnapping attempt.

“Maybe that’s where you are. Did you make it across the border, Shen Qingqiu? Did you make it all the way to his bed?” Luo Binghe’s hand clasped around Shen Qingqiu’s throat like a collar. “Are you spreading your legs in return for protection?”

Shen Qingqiu would, if he thought Hou-jun stood a chance against Luo Binghe. Would have seen it as a worthy transaction to get rid of his living nightmare, if only because escaping Hou-jun seemed a thousand times easier than escaping Luo Binghe.

The fingers around his throat flexed, but the grip didn’t tighten. He realized Luo Binghe was trying. He was being nice, as nice as he could be to Shen Qingqiu.

“I would,” he offered. “I would if I thought he could keep me safe from you.” His words were meant to be said harshly, but came out as a whisper, forcing Luo Binghe to lean down to hear him.

“Oh, Shen Qingqiu,” Luo Binghe said and lifted his head to look at Shen Qingqiu, his eyes dark. “No one can keep you safe from me.”

Shen Qingqiu kept his eyes on Luo Binghe, feeling the pull of his stare at the very core of his soul. “Not even you?”

Confusion flashed across Luo Binghe’s face. “Me?”

Shen Qingqiu was unable to keep a mocking tone out of his voice when he answered. “If not, why would I ever tell you where I am? What do you have to offer?”

“If you tell me where you are, I’ll temper myself.” Luo Binghe offered, his hand encircling Shen Qingqiu’s left wrist in a loose grip.

He lifted the hand up, inspecting it slowly before piercing Shen Qingqiu with his gaze again. “I think we both know what I had planned for you.” He tugged on the arm almost gently, reminding them both of how easily he had pulled it off.

“But I won’t do that. If you tell me where you are, I’ll let you keep your arms.” He offered it so casually, like Shen Qingqiu would think it was a boon.

“And my legs?” His arm was released as Luo Binghe’s hand wormed its way down the hem of his robes, his long fingers wrapping around his thigh. The casual way Luo Binghe was touching him made his skin break into goosebumps, his body expecting pain and getting gentle touches instead. The hand was slowly dragged down to his ankle again, the delicate bones cradled in Luo Binghe’s hand.

“The bells need to be somewhere,” he contemplated, thumb dragging the silver chains around his ankle.

Shen Qingqiu pulled his leg towards him and planted his foot on Luo Binghe’s shoulder, pushing him away, aware that Luo Binghe moved only because he wanted to. If he had the chance he would have kicked Luo Binghe in the face. The movement lifted his robes up higher, his modesty only barely preserved under Luo Binghe's curious stare.

“Tempting,” Shen Qingqiu said.

“Yes,” Luo Binghe responded, his voice low and oddly rough. Shen Qingqiu wondered if Luo Binghe was tempted to just rip his leg off there and then.

Abruptly, Luo Binghe got up and turned away. “As a gesture of goodwill, I’ll leave first. You can stay if you want. Reminisce a bit before you leave,” he said without turning to look at Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Qingqiu sat up, confused as Luo Binghe left. That was it? No more threats? No punishment?

He tugged on his robes, trying to pull them down before giving up with a huff. He didn’t like this confusing Luo Binghe. He preferred the one driven stupid by anger over the one who kept his cool and tried to bargain with him. Only trouble would come if Luo Binghe started actually thinking around him.

Slowly, he got up and dusted himself off. His home beckoned in the distance. Maybe for once he would listen to Luo Binghe. Morning would come soon enough, but until then he had time to reminisce about a life he could never return to.

Chapter 14: The Company He Keeps

Chapter Text

Luo Binghe left the dreamscape behind with a low simmer stirring deep in his gut. Usually, he didn’t move much while sleeping, but when he woke he found himself halfway turned toward Precious, one hand buried in the soft fur of his flank. For a moment he let himself lie there, listening to the soft breaths of his new friend.

He stroked the long flank, feeling a sense of relief over how quickly the body had gained a healthy layer of fat and muscle. He felt relief that Precious was growing stronger and healthier by the day, and pride that it happened because of him, because he chose to help Precious instead of putting him down, had decided to take him in instead of leaving him to die out there. All that he had done hadn’t ensured that Precious would tolerate him, let alone like him, but here they were. Precious liked him, trusted him. If only it was that easy to get Shen Qingqiu to trust him.

Luo Binghe sighed, the heat in his gut making itself known as his mind returned to Shen Qingqiu. He had been happy to see him, ready to do and say whatever it took to get Shen Qingqiu to reveal where he was, but the feeling had quickly turned to dismay when Shen Qingqiu stood in front of him.

The last time they met he had been so concerned with the scars on his back, too curious about the marks to really think about how he looked. But this time it was easy to tell that Shen Qingqiu was feeling better. Someone was taking care of him. Someone was looking after Shen Qingqiu, when the only person who had the right to do so was Luo Binghe. His complexion had a healthier color to it, his hair shiny and growing, and he had gained weight, filling out and regaining what he had lost.

He had clearly been embarrassed by the little chimes his steps made, and the healthy blush across his face had made Luo Binghe want to make him feel like that again. The panic Shen Qingqiu had felt when Luo Binghe had first pushed him down, and the occasional fits of anger he had been witness to, was less interesting than the way his eyes flashed with embarrassment. Nothing he had ever done to Shen Qingqiu had earned him that reaction before. The simple, human reaction of embarrassment was more than he had gotten from all the punishment he had given him. It had drawn Luo Binghe in, had made him want to get closer. Had made him want to study the small silver chains that broke Shen Qingqiu’s composure.

When Luo Binghe had pushed him down and almost folded him in half, he hadn’t been surprised at how flexible Shen Qingqiu was. He had twisted and folded him in far more strenuous positions back in his little cell. What surprised him was how his attention was drawn to the smoothness of his skin. How soft his backside had felt pressed against him once Luo Binghe realized just how intimate their position was. How many wives had he f*cked that position? How many times had he pushed their legs almost up to their ears, leaving them vulnerable and exposed to him all for his excitement?

And why had that excitement appeared when Shen Qingqiu was there? Why had it seemingly grown when Shen Qingqiu had planted one foot on him and pushed him away, face red and hair a windswept mess?

It had to be because it reminded him of his flexible wives. Perhaps he was due one of them a visit soon, but it would have to wait. Today was the day Shi Xingwu would take over the position as the leader of the Eastern Hold, taking the position after her father. And while he planned to take her to bed afterwards, he doubted it would satisfy his need.

He had enjoyed her cold beauty when they first met. Had looked into those beautiful green eyes and felt excitement at the disinterest seen in them. But she was, in a word, boring. She would bend a little for him, would sometimes tease him and hint at things, but she never followed through. She was pretending, putting on an act to get what she wanted. She thought she had him fooled, but he was well aware that her true ambition was to climb as high as she could, and that she didn’t mind climbing Luo Binghe to get there.

In a way he respected her. He too had taken wives he wasn’t too particularly interested in, just to gain something from it. Sometimes it was a favor, sometimes it was power, sometimes it was just for the anguish of their lover or the parent who dared to defy Luo Binghe. And so, Shi Xingwu had married him to make sure he would make her the ruler of the Eastern Hold, and Luo Binghe had married her because the color of her eyes was beautiful, and the disregard in them made thrilled him.

It was an important day, so with regret he slowly got out of bed, careful to not wake Precious. The wolf had worked hard yesterday, doing his best to help Luo Binghe, and had exhausted himself to the point that Luo Binghe felt guilty. He should have held Precious back, should have stopped him sooner, but he had been so focused on finally getting somewhere, finally finding a trace of Shen Qingqiu.

He rubbed a soft ear gently, listening to the content sigh that followed. In the future he would do better, would balance his urgent need to find Shen Qingqiu with taking care of Precious. It wouldn’t be right if Precious was hurt in his search for Shen Qingqiu.

The servants let themselves in, some tending to the fire that was still going strong, enhanced by his powers and the magical nature of the wood. The fire would keep Precious warm while he was gone, and Four Leaves would bring food when required. Still, he worried about what could go wrong while he was away.

The water in the tub was pleasantly warm as he got in, the servants moving quietly around him before leaving him alone. As he washed himself, he watched Precious as the long legs twitched, his paws moving as if he was running. Did he dream of running? Did his dreams take him somewhere Luo Binghe could never find him? If Precious truly was one of the experiments, an unlucky servant, did he dream of running away from here, to get away from his past?

Maybe he should take Precious somewhere else, but he was torn, wanting to stay close to where he knew Shen Qingqiu was. Due to the limits of Luo Binghe’s powers Shen Qingqiu had to be somewhere close, though with Luo Binghe’s ever expanding powers, the definition of close was always changing.

The castle was just close enough to the Western Kingdom that Shen Qingqiu could be hiding there, but he appeared honest when he told Luo Binghe that he wasn’t with Hou-jun.

The hand holding the cloth stilled at his neck, water dripping down his chest. Shen Qingqiu said he would have gone to Hou-jun’s bed if he thought it would save him. If not with Hou-jun, could that be where he was? In some man’s bed, giving himself up in exchange for protection? Who in the vicinity could protect Shen Qingqiu from Luo Binghe?

His powers were growing each day, fed and nurtured by Xin Mo and his own natural abilities, but his dream-walking abilities were still limited. The castle was in a remote area, and as far as he knew no one who lived close enough had the means to feed, hide, and protect Shen Qingqiu from both Luo Binghe’s powers and his soldiers.

Unless it was Hou-jun, and Shen Qingqiu was bluffing. Maybe they were together, laughing at him, believing they had him fooled. Hou-jun with his wistful longing, Shen Qingqiu with his not-so-honest words. Deceitful, he thought. Every word Shen Qingqiu spoke was always meant to hurt and mislead, so why would it be different this time?

The image from earlier reappeared, Shen Qingqiu on his back, leg up in the air, but this time it was Hou-jun who was cradled between his legs, who held his legs up and apart.

Luo Binghe’s grip on the cloth tightened, nails cutting through it as image after image raced through his mind. One in particular stuck in his mind; Shen Qingqiu dressed as Hou-jun had been, in a dark green robe open to the navel and cut open at both thighs. He tried not to look to closely at the silver chains inset with red gems running from Shen Qingqiu’s neck down to his ankles. Even without seeing the evidence, he knew the chains wrapped around his lower abdomen and coiled around his thighs. Shen Qingqiu’s smile as he walked was sharp and curled in satisfaction.

Every step Shen Qingqiu took would be a song, every movement he made would be a melody that said I belong to Hou-jun – I belong to Hou-jun – I belong to-, Luo Binghe threw the wet cloth across the room, watching with satisfaction as it knocked a painting off the wall.

Precious drowsily lifted his head and titled it to the side, huffing in annoyance at having been rudely awakened. “Sorry,” Luo Binghe muttered, regretting his actions.

He leaned back, closing his eyes and submerging himself completely in the water. There was an itch underneath his skin, enhanced by Xin Mo’s influence, calling him to action. Xin Mo wanted victory, wanted conquering and war. Wanted the taste of blood on its blade. Wanted to lay waste to Luo Binghe’s enemies and to his mind, and he knew this. He also knew his grasp on Xin Mo was precarious, that any emotional conflict he felt was a hole in his armor for Xin Mo to sink its tendrils into. He couldn’t afford vulnerabilities. Wouldn’t let himself have a weakness that could be exploited.

But Shen Qingqiu wasn’t a weakness. Luo Binghe’s need for revenge had given him strength, had held him together when he felt he was falling apart. Having Shen Qingqiu, exacting his revenge on him and owning him, kept him sane. It was the abrupt absence that was dangerous. It was Shen Qingqiu’s fault he was fraying at the edges, and once he got him back there would be no running away ever again. He would make sure Shen Qingqiu couldn’t run away. He would make sure Shen Qingqiu didn’t want to run away. He would give him no choice but to stay.

A scraping sound caught his attention and he opened his eyes, seeing Precious’ head peering down at him through the distorted view of the water. He sat up, shaking his head and spraying water everywhere, causing Precious’ eyes to narrow, his ears pulling back as he was doused in water.

“Were you worried?” Luo Binghe smiled, poking the wolf’s nose with a wet finger. Precious licked his nose and huffed before getting back down on the floor, curling up between the fire and the tub.

Luo Binghe washed himself efficiently, pushing away all thoughts of Shen Qingqiu. There would be time to deal with him later, but at the moment he needed to get ready.

He stepped out of the tub and sank down next to Precious, wiping himself by the fire. He patted himself dry, reveling in the heat from the fire sinking into his body as he chased the tiny drops of water running down his body. Precious had moved his head as soon as Luo Binghe sat down, turning completely towards the fire. From the corner of his eye he could see Precious had his eyes half closed, and even though it was hard to tell where he was looking with his black eyes, Luo Binghe was still confident his attention was on him. He turned his head, amusem*nt filling him as Precious closed his eyes before Luo Binghe’s head fully turned.

The way Precious acted when Sha Hualing had visited hinted that he was prudish, but the way he stubbornly refused to look at Luo Binghe confirmed it. Once again he wondered if Precious had been a servant, some unlucky man who dedicated his life to serve the former lord and only got misery in return.

With one hand he reached over, rubbing a silky ear and listening to the content sigh it gave him. He scooted closer and leaned down, resting his head on a furry shoulder. The soft, white cloth pooled down by his groin, covering him more for Precious’ modesty than his own. The peace that filled him was a balm to his overactive mind.

There was a thought poking at the back of his mind, waiting and wanting to be noticed, but when he reached for it, it slipped away. Something wanted to connect, and he knew by now that eventually it would get there by itself, but it was still frustrating when it didn’t happen as soon as he wanted to.

Precious’ tail thumped lazily against the floor, heart beating slow underneath Luo Binghe’s head. His companion had a good life here with him, he knew that. The image of Shen Qingqiu’s melodic anklet crossed his mind, and he eyed the soft neck curiously. He wouldn’t put a bell on Precious, but a collar might be a good idea. It would give protection whenever Precious was alone, the collar letting people know he belonged to Luo Binghe. It would further establish their relationship, and hopefully show Precious just how important he was to Luo Binghe, how much he belonged by his side.

It would have to be something extravagant, something elegant and befitting someone like Precious. Luo Binghe spanned his hand across the sleek neck, watching as his fingers sank into the soft fur.

He would have the best spell casters and charm inventors work on the collar, ensuring that it would protect Precious against anything. And a good charm would ensure that if Precious was still growing, the collar would expand to fit him perfectly.

Humming to himself Luo Binghe got up, smiling at Precious’ discontent huff as he walked over to the table. Quickly he created a couple of rough sketches of imposing pieces made of iron with protective spikes for fighting, and a couple of collars consisting of delicate golden chains for everyday use.

Consumed, he drew a thin, perfectly circular collar, imagining it as a solid piece of white marble inset with silver veins. A bell hung from the center, and only when he had sketched a long, elegant human neck wearing it did he realize what he was doing. He still finished it, drawing soft, straight hair falling down on wide, masculine shoulders and stark collarbones. Leaning back, he considered his drawing critically. Shen Qingqiu had always seemed to prefer silver over gold and the collar would perfectly suit his personality. Impressive, unreachable. Untouchable for everyone except Luo Binghe. A finger traced the bell curiously as he stared at his work.

He stopped what he was doing, irritated by his own thoughts. He was dedicating too much time on thinking about Shen Qingqiu, instead of thinking of ways to get him back. There was no use drawing collars if there was no one to wear them. Pushing the paper away he got up, making his way to the ceremonial clothes the servants had laid out for him.

It was a high-waisted white skirt with a wide red decorative hem across the top and bottom. The top of the skirt wrapped around his midriff, almost reaching the bottom of his ribs. He wrapped the straps carefully around his waist, tying them off and tucking them away. Precious moved in his peripheral vision, watching him intently with dark eyes as Luo Binghe straightened out the fabric of his skirt.

Next came a short jacket with long sleeves, the bottom of the jacket reaching just shy of the skirt. The clasps were dragon heads made of silver that caught onto embellished loops, leaving his sternum fairly exposed. A long, white robe completed the outfit, decorated with the same red hem as the skirt and the jacket, along with a dragon motif stretching along the back.

Luo Binghe made a show of twirling around, the skirt fanning outwards as he stopped in front of Precious. “What do you think? Not my usual style.”

The wolf stared at him, the fire reflected in its eyes making it appear hungry, ravenous. Luo Binghe would have to remind Four Leaves to feed him well. His tail thumbed three times in what was high praise coming from Precious.

“Thank you,” he said and crouched down, scratching behind the soft ears.

“I’ll be back tonight or tomorrow morning,” he murmured before getting up. “Don’t eat Four Leaves, and don’t get in trouble!” With that he opened a rift with Xin Mo to the Eastern Hold’s palace, taking him straight to a room adjacent to the ceremonial hall.

Shi Xingwu was already there, along with her father and his former advisor Cui Yongzheng. As soon as she saw Luo Binghe she walked over him, and he noticed how Cui Yongzheng’s eyes followed her.

He wrapped his arms around her waist as he leaned down to kiss her in greeting. She kissed him back but broke it off quickly, holding herself stiffly in his arms. His hands fell on warm skin, and he took a step back to look at her.

From the front she looked demure, especially for a demon. Her hair was braided and tied up, decorated with golden stars. Her dress had a high collar and was white and red like his, covering her completely from neck to toe, but when she turned her entire back was exposed, the dress held together by golden chains as it fell open down to her backside.

The fleeting image of a scarred back decorated by silver chains was immediately pushed down. Luo Binghe lifted a hand and straightened out one of the many golden decorations in her hair. “You look beautiful,” he said to her, more focused on Cui Yongzheng’s clenched hands than the blush that warmed her face.

“Thank you,” she said and looked at him. “You look handsome.” It was said almost perfunctory, but he could hear a hint of appreciation in her voice. He wasn’t interested in her praise, what interested him more was how Cui Yongzheng turned away at her words.

Luo Binghe smiled and offered his arm to her, and together they entered the ceremonial hall. He had little to do with the ceremony itself, her father doing most of the talking and handing over the symbolic sword to his daughter, signifying the change in leadership. Luo Binghe only had to be there to show his approval, both as their ruler and as her husband.

After the ceremony he accompanied Shi Xingwu to the celebration, mingling and keeping her company as she spoke with the other high-ranking demons in attendance. It was all mostly petty politics, little tiffs between nobles who all believed they were right. It was the kind of thing he gladly let others handle while he dealt with the bigger things, but she was well-versed in handling the childish spats, and he heard the uncommitted diplomacy in her every word. It was the same way she usually dealt with him.

It was the same when he had first approached her. He had liked the look of her, and she had liked the look of her future with him. The Eastern Hold was more human than demonic in its archaic traditions. Shi Xingwu could only become its ruler if she was married to a man, and most of the eligible men in the Hold would gladly marry her and then take the position from her. Luo Binghe had no need to push her aside when he knew she was far more capable at managing the Eastern Hold’s affairs than anyone else.

So, he smiled and made small talk, gathering support for himself and his wife, watching as Cui Yongzheng circled around them. Luo Binghe had never spent time with Cui Yongzheng and Shi Xingwu together in the same room. Cui Yongzheng had been her father’s advisor and had gladly jumped ship once Luo Binghe conquered the Hold.

Luo Binghe wrapped an arm around her back, smiling over at Cui Yongzheng, who gave a terse smile in reply before turning away. Was it a one-sided attraction? He looked closely at Shi Xingwu throughout the night, noting how she never looked at Cui Yongzheng. Not once, not even by accident, did her eyes stray over to him, which meant she was always aware of where he was.

So, not so one-sided as he first thought. He knew the Easter Hold was steeped in rules and traditions, and someone like an advisor would never be allowed to marry the leader’s daughter.

Luo Binghe had a rule when it came to most of his wives. He didn’t mind if they had lovers, as long as he never heard about them. After a while he simply didn’t care enough about who they spent time with. Some of his wives he guarded a bit more jealously, but in return, those wives were satisfied by his attention alone. His closest wives all clamored for his attention and would never look for someone else.

Shi Xingwu would not be one of those wives. The interest he had in her when they first met had quickly become superficial. He was always pleased to have her in his bed, would always appreciate time spent together that way, but like most of his wives that was all there was.

The smile she gave him when they were finally alone was real but not especially heartfelt. He knew she liked him well enough, and if he pushed the issue, he knew she would fall in love with him, but her devotion was currently to her Hold and not to him.

He poured them tea, the fragrant herbal blend filling the room and tugging at his mind. The aroma was familiar and it took him a moment to realize it was the same tea he drank with Hou-jun. She smiled at him over her own cup, a tiny, fleeting thing. Was it a coincidence? Were they closer than Luo Binghe knew? If so, was serving him the tea done on purpose or by accident? Was it done as a petty ‘look how clever we are’ gesture?

He drank the tea with a smile of his own, confident in his body’s ability to protect him from any poison. As far as he knew there was no poison that could harm him. Just to show how unsuspecting he was, he ate a flower cake, humming appreciatively at he taste.

“Will my wife take her husband to bed tonight?” Luo Binghe asked, looking into the green eyes that had first caught his attention and feeling little of the allure that had fluttered in his chest when they first got married.

“If that’s what my husband wants,” she answered noncommittedly.

It was an answer meant to be vague. It was the sort of aloofness that had driven him crazy in the beginning, made him ache for her and want her. Now it annoyed him. He had always wanted the coldness in her to be more demanding. Wanted to hear what she wanted so he could give it to her. Wanted her to voice her desires so he could fulfill them. Had always wanted her to demand, so that he could serve, but all he got was vague answers. He still wanted to take her to bed. Wanted to make her feel good, it was just how he was when it came to his wives.

Her cup was empty, so he got up, tugging her along with him. He only had to unhook the chains on her dress for it to fall on the floor and then she was naked in front of him. Her posture was proud, prouder even when he made her sit on the bed so he could crouch and take off her shoes.

Her long legs were smooth underneath his touch, and he let his hands wander across the soft skin, giving her a light massage. He lifted one leg and placed it on his shoulder, shaking away the fleeting memory it brought back off Shen Qingqiu before it could settle in his mind.

Pushing her back on the bed he used his mouth on her until she came apart on his tongue, shaking and moaning above him. He let her catch her breath before he got up on the bed and tugged her on top of him, watching how the light reflected off the stars in her hair.

“What do you want?” he asked her, fingers gripping her soft thighs.

“Whatever my husband wants. This is fine,” she calmly answered.

He set the rhythm for them as she chased her pleasure on top of him, and he gave her all the attention she needed to reach it, but the intrusive thoughts from earlier reappeared, unwilling to be chased away. Was this how Shen Qingqiu was in bed? Always pretending, always scheming? He had to be. There was no way a man so frigid would be loose and pliant and enjoyable in bed without pretending.

An image sprung forward of their previous meeting. Shen Qingqiu on his back, pink across the face and hair sticking to his face, leg pushed up against his chest and foot dangling in the air.

If Luo Binghe hadn’t given him the clothes he would have been naked underneath him. Vulnerable and open where Luo Binghe pressed up against him. His foot, placed firmly against Luo Binghe’s chest, telling him no. Refusing him, rejecting him, like only Shen Qingqiu had ever done.

His lips curled up in annoyance, pulling Shi Xingwu’s head down against his chest, speeding up his movements. She got what she wanted, she got the Eastern Hold, and now he would get what he wanted.

He rolled them around until she was beneath him and flipped her over onto her stomach. Without hesitation he lifted her hips and entered her again, driving into her hard and fast. Her back was smooth and unblemished underneath his wandering hands, and the sight made his annoyance grow.

His hand wandered down her stomach before ending up where they were joined, his fingers rubbing against her sensitive spot until she tightened around him. He let her soft walls milk him, spilling inside of her with a sigh. Catching his breath he rolled over, holding her in his arms for a moment before kissing the top of her head and getting up.

“I’ll be going,” he said, seeing the conflicted relief she tried to hide. It didn’t sting as it probably should have. They might not be very compatible, but she was still his wife. He hoped she had gotten what she was after now, and that she would be happy as the leader of the Hold. Even if they were married, even if she was his wife, he wouldn’t tolerate betrayal.

“I know. You never stay the night,” she said. It was meant to be a complaint, a barb at his elusiveness, but it didn’t get to him as she hoped for.

“I’ll see you soon,” he said and left, unwilling to spend more time with her. Unwilling to be away any longer from where he wanted to be.

Xin Mo brought him to his bedroom where Precious was dozing in front of the fire. At the sound of Luo Binghe’s arrival he got up and trotted over, bumping into his legs like an overgrown cat.

“Did you miss me?” Luo Binghe crouched down, ruffling the soft fur and rubbing his chin.

Precious pushed him with his head, nuzzling closer, and he reached over to pet him some more. At least someone was truly happy to see him.

Yawning, he got up and poured himself some wine, undoing his clothes until he was left in nothing but the long skirt. Wine in one hand, he opened the doors to the balcony and leaned against the opening, taking in the full moon.

Even with his eyes on the sky he could feel Precious staring at him and he turned, giving him a tired smile. The soft thump of his tail could be heard through the silence of the night, a rhythmic reminder that he wasn’t alone. Maybe that was all he needed.

Precious bumped into him again, settling against his side, and Luo Binghe reached down to place one hand on his head. His own head was feeling heavy, and the bed seemed to call for him. He looked down at his wine, swirling it around in the cup until it threatened to spill over the edges and stain his clothes.

“Maudlin,” he commented, watching the wine swirl around in circles.

Images of Shen Qingqiu flashed in front of his eyes, bell fixed to his collar, scarred back on display in Shi Xingwu’s backless dress. “Idiotic,” he huffed, emptying the cup and closing the doors.

Without bothering to remove the last of his clothes he crawled onto the bed. Precious watched him for a few moments before he too got on the bed. Luo Binghe reached over, tugging Precious into his arms before curling around him, feeling the warmth seep into his skin.

Shen Qingqiu was in his head, eyes cold and tongue sharp, his foot on Luo Binghe’s chest telling him exactly what he wanted. “Demanding.” He yawned, pulling Precious close as sleep caught up to him.

Chapter 15: Poison the Well

Chapter Text

Shen Qingqiu dozed by the fireplace after Luo Binghe left, content to wait for Four Leaves to bring him food before he put his plan into action.

It left him time to think about his own recent behavior around Luo Binghe. He had tried to look away as Luo Binghe dried off, but he found it surprisingly hard. If Shen Qingqiu’s eyes had been in competition against his will his eyes had been the obvious winners, no matter how hard he tried to keep them off Luo Binghe. It was as if they had a mind of their own, drawn to the drops of water racing down Luo Binghe’s body.

He had tried not to stare, but he wasn’t Shen Qingqiu when he was looking, was he? He was Precious, who could look without risking death. Who, judging by Luo Binghe’s actions, was allowed to look.

Before, he didn’t want to look, uninterested and mortified at every glance he got of Luo Binghe’s body, but by now Luo Binghe had seen all of him, had touched almost all of him. Was that what this behavior was about? Reciprocating? Getting even?

Not long ago, Luo Binghe ripped his arm off and promised him a world of pain, but then he had touched Shen Qingqiu with the lightest of touches as he traced the scars down his back. Had held Shen Qingqiu underneath him and clothed him when he understood his fear. Had pushed Shen Qingqiu down and touched him but then released him. Was Shen Qingqiu simply getting even in the one way he could, sneaking glimpses as Precious that would infuriate Luo Binghe if he knew who he truly was?

Shen Qingqiu had watched Luo Binghe wrap the straps on his skirt tightly around his solid waist, had wondered how such a constraining yet free-flowing garment felt to a man who hated to be controlled, yet yearned to be reined in.

Luo Binghe had twirled for him, looking every bit the demon lord he proclaimed to be. The was no trace of human tradition in the clothes except the dragon embroidered on his robes, telling the world who he was in a bold yet understated way.

As he twirled and showed off, the need to bite and drag him down had reappeared, and when Luo Binghe made to leave it had grown. Shen Qingqiu had wanted the white robes to turn red, had wanted to set his teeth around the vulnerable throat he had just been watching with interest.

The idea of taking Luo Binghe down while he was still Precious was both thrilling and distasteful. On one hand he wanted Luo Binghe to experience someone he thought of as a friend turning against him, like he had turned the world against Shen Qingqiu. But on the other hand, if it came to it and they had to get physical, Shen Qingqiu would want Luo Binghe to know just who bested him. Just who it was that was above him. He didn’t necessarily want a fight, nor did he think he would win one, but if it came down to it, Shen Qingqiu would put survival over satisfaction, would tear Luo Binghe apart with sharp teeth and sharper claws. Would break Luo Binghe’s heart if it meant keeping his own beating.

Shen Qingqiu still didn’t like or trust Luo Binghe, but as Precious it was hard not to feel some sort of appreciation for the companionship and the kindness Luo Binghe showed him. He had thought it would be easy to compartmentalize, to keep the experiences as Shen Qingqiu and Precious apart. Logically he knew that Luo Binghe ruined his life, gave him pain and threatened his very existence, and that a few pets and some bandages wouldn’t make up for it.

When he thought about it, nothing felt as if it could make up for what Luo Binghe put him through, but sometimes Luo Binghe would look at him with the sort of soft expression that only ever Yue Qingyuan had given him, except without the guilt and pity that Yue Qingyuan would direct his way. The expression he received from Luo Binghe was given purely because Luo Binghe felt he deserved such softness. The praise he was given just for merely existing was a whole new experience. Luo Binghe was generous with his words, whether they were praise for Precious being by his side or compliments for just doing what he wanted.

Had Luo Binghe directed such praise at Shen Qingqiu himself, he would have balked at the words. If Luo Binghe had returned from the Endless Abyss and praised Shen Qingqiu, he would have gone looking for a new Endless Abyss to push Luo Binghe into. But the prison cell had been lonely, and Luo Binghe’s words and his touch had been cruel. And Shen Qingqiu knew it wasn’t healthy, but each soft touch, each kind word tugged on invisible strings he didn’t know were tied to him. Each kind act made him uncomfortable, made him lightheaded, made him want to run away from the reactions he was having.

As a tactician he knew kindness was a strategy used to turn prisoners and tired soldiers against their leaders. It was an efficient strategy that turned those who suffered the most into loyal subjects. If you feed a stray dog, it will become a loyal companion and if you show an abused man kindness, he will fall over himself to help you.

Four Leaves entered the room carrying a bowl of food, and Shen Qingqiu scoffed at himself. Life had turned him into nothing more than a dog, grateful that Luo Binghe reminded his servants to feed him.

Four Leaves gave him the look of consideration he always gave him, his eyes watching him carefully. It made him wonder what he knew, if he had been privy to the experiments the former castle lord had done, and if he knew Shen Qingqiu had not been one of them.

He watched Four Leaves from where he was resting by the fireplace, content to wait until he was gone before he started eating. The demon bowed and moved towards the doors where he hesitated before turning back. They stared at each other for a moment before he turned around and left without a word. The way his hands had clenched had not been missed, nor had the hesitation.

The bowl was full of fine meat that easily lured him closed, but underneath the mouthwatering smell was a scent of nothingness. It was a scent of emptiness that his nose picked up, but his mind couldn’t make sense of. All he knew was that his senses told him it was wrong. It was dangerous.

He looked up, eyeing the closed doors. Did Four Leaves try to poison him or was it someone else? By his guilty demeanor he was at least aware of what was happening, which meant Shen Qingqiu would have to watch him closely in the future, and it was even more important that he started on his plan.

Carefully he picked up the bowl with his mouth and carried it out onto the balcony. He dug a hole in the remaining snow and tipped the contents into it and covered it back up, careful to make it look natural. The bowl was placed back where it had been before he stepped into the hallway. There was no one there, so at least no one was standing by to kill him right away.

He slinked down the dimly lit hallway, straining his ears for any sign of suspicious activity, but it seemed like he was all alone. Once he was next to the Shimmering-Million-Remedies-Tree stick that Luo Binghe carelessly displayed on the wall he stopped. The Shimmering-Million-Remedies-Tree, or more commonly know as the Remedy tree, was as the name entailed, used to make remedies. Even in a raw form it could cure almost any illness.

He got close to the stick and awkwardly stood up on two legs, one paw supporting him on the wall. With his available paw he carefully rotating the stick until he could reach the back. It took a couple of tries, the curves of the wood made it hard to turn and he couldn’t use his claws out of fear of leaving a visible mark on the front of the stick. His paw kept slipping, the toes refusing to bend like the fingers he wished he still had.

He huffed a breath just as the stick finally turned halfway around. Using his claws carefully, he cut off a couple of small pieces, just the right amount to be useful and to be sold if needed, but not so much he couldn’t carry it in his mouth without suspicion. Once he was done the stick was rotated back with less trouble now that he had some experience with it, and he hurried back to his room.

He eyed the floor to ceiling shelves next to Luo Binghe’s desk. Some of the books on the lowest shelves appeared slightly dusty and unused, so he pulled out a couple of the books and carefully deposited the pieces of wood on the back of the shelf. Putting the books back was a lot harder than he had anticipated, the fragile covers threatening to rip in the grip of his teeth and his claws, but he managed to put them back without getting too much saliva on them. Even if Luo Binghe came back right away, Shen Qingqiu doubted he would be observant enough to notice a couple of shiny book spines.

The Shimmering-Million-Remedies-Tree might be of help in the future, if he could prepare it properly it might help his broken meridians and his cultivation. If that wasn’t an option, the small amount he had taken would make him more than enough money to be able to get far away from Luo Binghe.

Satisfied with his work, his eyes landed on the desk where Luo Binghe had been lost in thought before he left, and curiosity pulled him over for a look. He peeked at the papers, blood freezing in his veins at what he saw. For some reason he hadn’t thought Luo Binghe would want to put a collar on Precious, and that had been a mistake. Luo Binghe had drawn several collars and had sketched a few suggestions for charms next to them. The ones for his protection were fine, but the other ones made his breath shorten. There were tracking charms and charms that would limit how far he could travel. If Luo Binghe got such a collar on him there would be no escaping him. If Luo Binghe wanted it, such a collar could keep Shen Qingqiu confined to their room, without the need to lock the doors.

He stepped back from the desk to pace in front of the fire, head filled with panic. Forcing himself to take several deep breaths, he thought it over. Luo Binghe had drawn the collars that very day, so he wouldn’t be getting one any time soon, or at least not for a few days. It gave him time to escape, even if he had preferred to wait a little longer until the weather was better. He would have to be ready for a quick escape. And while drawing the collars didn’t mean Luo Binghe would follow through with it, Shen Qingqiu had his doubts. He had come to learn that once Luo Binghe put his mind to something there was no stopping him.

Shen Qingqiu looked out to the balcony, assessing the melting snow. The next time Luo Binghe left he would have to make a run for it. If he waited until it was too late he would never forgive himself. And the longer he waited, the more likely it was that Luo Binghe would finally figure out who he was.

Suddenly, a shimmering rift appeared in the middle of the room, and he dropped down, pretending to be resting in front of the fire just as Luo Binghe stepped into the room.

Immediately, he could tell that Luo Binghe reeked of herbal tea and sex, with a hint of plum blossoms clinging to him. Shen Qingqiu got up, heart racing as he made his way over to greet Luo Binghe like a properly domesticated pet.

Luo Binghe’s movements were a little slow and unsteady as he crouched down to properly greet him. “Did you miss me?”

He pushed Luo Binghe with his head, watching as he uncharacteristically had to stabilize himself. He smiled at Shen Qingqiu, seemingly unaware of his own unsteadiness. Was he drunk? Shen Qingqiu watched him closely, but he could find no other signs of Luo Binghe being intoxicated.

Luo Binghe yawned and reached for a pitcher of wine, and before Shen Qingqiu knew it, Luo Binghe had undone his robes and his jacket, leaving him in only the waist-high white skirt.

Framed by the balcony doors and highlighted by the moonlight, he looked more like a fairy than a demon, more like a deity than a man. The light of the moon made him silver-pale, a specter made just to haunt Shen Qingqiu forever.

Luo Binghe turned towards him and gave him that crooked deep-felt smile he reserved for Precious, and something deep inside of Shen Qingqiu twinged. He thumped his tail and watched the smile turn melancholic.

The diminished smile pulled him towards Luo Binghe, curious as to what had brought him down, and he settled next to him, watching the outside as Luo Binghe rested his hand on his head. The fingers curled into his fur absentmindedly, stroking him as they spent a moment gazing outside together.

“Maudlin. Idiotic.” Spoken in a low tone, the words broke through the silence. Luo Binghe suddenly appeared to be offended by the view, huffing as he pulled the doors shut and crawled into bed. The sudden shift made him wonder even more what had happened during the ceremony to sour his mood.

Shen Qingqiu got on the bed, choosing to stay close but not too close, but then Luo Binghe reached over and pulled him into his arms, embracing him completely. His skin felt unnaturally cold to the touch. Luo Binghe always felt warmer than the fireplace, but now he was as cold as he river Shen Qingqiu almost drowned in.

“Demanding,” Luo Binghe murmured and pulled him closer, arms wrapping around him and caging him in. Within moments his breath had evened out, making Shen Qingqiu’s ears twitch with each soft puff that ruffled them. He spent a moment wondering who Luo Binghe was talking about. Who it was that could follow him into sleep.

Confident that Luo Binghe was asleep, he turned in his grip to get a better look at him. In doing so, he came face to face with the impossible beast. He studied the way his long eyelashes fanned across his cheeks, how his hair curled sweetly around his face. In that moment he looked more innocent than he had when Shen Qingqiu had first met him. He didn’t look like the man who ruined Shen Qingqiu’s life. He looked like a man who was generous with his praise and his soft touches, choosing to heal instead of hurt, to protect instead of harm.

Luo Binghe’s breath blew across his face, and on it he caught the same wrong nothingness he had from his meal. The same emptiness, except this time almost hidden within a familiar herbal fragrance.

Was that what had caused Luo Binghe to look so tired? What had made him fall asleep before he was undressed? Shen Qingqiu shifted in the tight grip again, eyes moving from one set of doors to the other. He couldn’t hear anyone outside, couldn’t see any shifting shadows.

He wormed his way out of Luo Binghe’s grip without caution, alarm racing through Shen Qingqiu when it didn’t wake him. What poison could affect a demon like Luo Binghe?

He crept towards the doors leading to the hallway, listening intently. There was no one there. He checked the hallway and the balcony, finding no trace of anyone.

Returning to the bed, he put his nose to Luo Binghe’s throat, tracking his heartbeat. It was steady, slower than normal but not dangerously so. Whatever drug or poison it was, it had pulled Luo Binghe into a deep sleep.

This close it was hard to ignore just how his body reacted to Luo Binghe’s scent, how the smokey earthiness made his mouth water and his gums itch.

He opened his mouth, setting his teeth carefully against the vulnerable skin on either side of Luo Binghe’s throat. There was no sound in the room except their breathing, Luo Binghe’s one slow breath for every two of Shen Qingqiu’s.

The moment stretched out, his whole body taut with tension as he held Luo Binghe’s life in his hands. He leaned back, teeth leaving Luo Binghe’s throat unharmed. Frustration filled him and he huffed, a low growl filling the room. No one would be able to stop him, not even Luo Binghe, so why couldn’t he do it?

Before he had a chance to try again, soft footsteps alerted him to an incoming guest, and instinct drove him into Luo Binghe’s arms, closing his eyes just as the doors opened. As the footsteps came closer he made sure his breathing matched Luo Binghe’s steady rhythm, keeping his body lax to trick the intruder.

The uninvited guest stopped a few steps from the bed, and for a few moments he seemed to just stand there. Then he moved, the sound of his footsteps indicating he was walking away. The doors closed with a soft click and Shen Qingqiu waited for a few breaths, biding his time before he opened his eyes narrowly, deep in thought.

He didn’t need sight to recognize the footsteps of Four Leaves. It was one thing to try to poison Shen Qingqiu, but why would he help poison Luo Binghe? Who was behind it all? The fact that they didn’t carry through with an attempt on Luo Binghe’s life would indicate they were waiting, and that they were confident Luo Binghe wouldn’t realize what had happened when he woke up.

The most important question was, did Luo Binghe know? Did he willingly let himself be poisoned, or did someone manage to fool him?

If someone managed to kill Luo Binghe, Shen Qingqiu would be free forever. If he ran now while Luo Binghe slept, it might alert him that something was wrong, and the would-be assassins might fail.

He settled further into Luo Binghe’s arms, eyes on the door and curiosity piqued. Would someone actually manage to take Luo Binghe down? At the thought, something deep inside of him twinged before it was ruthlessly squashed. It would certainly be for the best if someone succeeded where Shen Qingqiu failed.

Chapter 16: Walking and waiting

Chapter Text

He kept an eye on Luo Binghe throughout the night, watching his breathing, checking his temperature, feeling his own mood plummet with every steady heartbeat.

There had never been a moment where he had hesitated to take a life. Maybe that was a lie. Once he had a blade in his hand there was no stopping him from taking down Qiu Jianlou, and later Wu Yanzi had helped hone his skills. But maybe Luo Binghe had always been the exception. After Luo Binghe came back from the Endless Abyss, Shen Qingqiu spent a lot of time berating himself while thinking about the Immortal Alliance Conference.

Why hadn’t he killed him then? Why had he forced him into the Endless Abyss instead of cutting him down? If he had taken Luo Binghe’s life then he wouldn’t be in this position now, watching over him as unknown forces plotted against him.

During the night Luo Binghe turned onto his back, pulling Shen Qingqiu with him. Every rise of the broad chest underneath his head reminded him that he was a failure. A coward hoping someone else would do what he couldn’t. He kept listening, hoping someone would come and drive a knife through the slowly beating heart.

No one came. When Luo Binghe’s eyes finally opened, the disappointment that filled Shen Qingqiu was surprisingly weak. Clever fingers immediately found the good spot just between his shoulder blades, making his tail wag in satisfaction against his will.

Luo Binghe stretched comfortably, a long line of strong, hard muscle underneath Shen Qingqiu. His eyes sparkled in the low light as he ruffled Shen Qingqiu’s fur. “That was a good sleep,” he said.

Shen Qingqiu tilted his head. A good sleep? Did the idiot not know he had been drugged? Was there no lingering trace of it that he could sense? He looked at Luo Binghe, taking in the lazy smile and the sparkling eyes. There was no hint of a drug or trace of poison lingering on his breath.

“Ah, you’re so cute when you do that!” Luo Binghe’s ruffling became more vigorous, and Shen Qingqiu suffered through the indignity of being treated like a ragdoll.

Cute? He was dangerous. A vicious animal. A killer of all things not Luo Binghe apparently. He had Luo Binghe underneath him, defenseless and vulnerable. It would only take one swipe, one bite, to open that exposed throat.

He could feel his mouth watering again at the idea of holding Luo Binghe’s life between his teeth, of having Luo Binghe’s flesh in his mouth. He lowered his head, slowly creeping forward across the solid chest, but just when he was a hair’s breadth from his target, Luo Binghe shoved him forward.

His nose butted up against the underside of Luo Binghe’s chin, and he scrambled back only to be held in place by Luo Binghe, who ruffled him even harder. He let himself be manhandled, taking in that woodsy smokey scent that was purely Luo Binghe. The last lingering traces of Shi Xingwu had disappeared during the night, leaving Luo Binghe to smell only of himself. A tiny part of his brain gleefully pointed out that Luo Binghe surely smelled like Shen Qingqiu now too, but the thought was immediately ignored.

Luo Binghe was laughing so he nipped at his skin, causing Luo Binghe to flip them over. What started as trying to get away quickly turned into a grappling game, Luo Binghe grasping for purchase while Shen Qingqiu wormed away, reveling in the chance to accidentally kick Luo Binghe in the face once or twice. Or thrice.

He didn’t know how it happened or why it was so easy to fall into play. How dodging a hand and running just out of reach could feel fun. The bed quickly turned into disarray, blankets and covers scrunched up and falling halfway to the floor as Shen Qingqiu did his best to avoid Luo Binghe’s long arms in their tiny arena.

He did a lap around Luo Binghe and saw his chance. Quickly he barged into him, pushing him off the bed and onto the floor. Luo Binghe landed with a soft thud on a scrunched-up blanket and looked up at Shen Qingqiu with laughter in his eyes that quickly died. In its stead came a hint of playful fear and his hands came up to shield his face. Shen Qingqiu took the hint, crouching down and pouncing on Luo Binghe, landing on him with a satisfying oof.

The wind had been knocked out of Luo Binghe, but it didn’t stop him from laughing. His lips stretched out into a wide, crooked smile, his eyes turning into crescent moons as his nose scrunched up.

With his hair a mess, his eyes still a little sleepy and his face radiating happiness, Shen Qingqiu had the sudden realization that Luo Binghe was beautiful. He sank down, watching as the laughter died down and satisfaction settled on Luo Binghe’s face.

Nausea filled him as gentle hands stroked his sides, Luo Binghe humming contently underneath him. First he couldn’t kill him, and now he thought Luo Binghe was beautiful?

Sure, he knew Luo Binghe was handsome, anyone could objectively see that, but seeing Luo Binghe as beautiful was something else entirely. It was dangerous. It was absurd. It was born from a handful of kind gestures and consideration. It was born from Luo Binghe treating him not like Shen Qingqiu but like Precious.

He lay there fretting over his own stupidity until he couldn’t take it any longer and he removed himself, careful to act as natural as he could. Luo Binghe got up, watching him with warmth in his eyes while he threw the blankets back on the bed.

“I’m visiting Mobei-jun tomorrow, do you want to come?” Luo Binghe’s voice held the friendly tone he used with Precious, and it turned his fretting into anger.

He didn’t want friendship. He didn’t need friendship, especially not with Luo Binghe. So why did it sting knowing it wasn’t really directed at him? Why did it annoy him when he had spent half the night hoping someone would come in and take Luo Binghe’s life? Why did playing with an overgrown idiotic child scramble his mind?

Luo Binghe watched him patiently, as if he expected Shen Qingqiu to give him a verbal answer. In reply he thumped his tail against the floor twice before curling up in front of the fireplace. Luo Binghe’s answering hum was amused, further fueling Shen Qingqiu’s anger.

Even though he wanted to go with Luo Binghe in case he got to see Shang Qinghua, he should have said no. He needed to clear his mind and prepare himself to leave. He couldn’t stay here much longer. Couldn’t let the softness of Precious invade his mind and heart. Couldn’t let himself feel anything but anger towards Luo Binghe, because if he did and Luo Binghe found Shen Qingqiu it would break him when Luo Binghe turned cruel again. Luo Binghe liked Precious and still hated Shen Qingqiu. There would be no kindness directed at him if he ever found himself in the presence of Luo Binghe again.

“Alright. I’ll make us breakfast, you just wait here your highness,” Luo Binghe teased.

It took long enough that he fell asleep, dreaming nonsensical things when Luo Binghe returned with a breakfast tray full of delicious smelling food.

Shen Qingqiu was grateful for the chicken Luo Binghe had taken time to braise for him, handfeeding him piece by piece, but he still looked with envy at Luo Binghe’s food. He missed ordinary food and the variety that came with it.

His tongue swiped across Luo Binghe’s fingers, and maybe he missed that most of all. His own body, frail as it was. He missed looking like himself outside of his dreams.

A knock came just as breakfast was over, and Four Leaves stepped into the room. His eyes quickly scanned Shen Qingqiu as he bowed. “The jeweler was most willing to meet you and will be expecting you soon.”

“That was quick,” Luo Binghe remarked. They had clearly spoken while Luo Binghe had been gone making breakfast and Shen Qingqiu regretted not tagging along and observing Four Leaves for more information.

“Thank you, Four Leaves,” Luo Binghe said in clear dismissal. Four Leaves bowed again and left, eyes lingering on Shen Qingqiu.

When the doors closed, Luo Binghe turned to look at Shen Qingqiu with a sigh. “There’s something off about him, but I can’t put my finger on it. When I took the castle he was more than happy to continue working here, serving me as the new lord. Nothing has changed, but still-,” Luo Binghe trailed off, staring at Shen Qingqiu while he scratched his ears.

Begrudgingly he could admit that Luo Binghe had some good instincts. He was picking up subtleties with ease, despite not knowing all of it. It was part of why he was coming to realize he had to leave sooner rather than later. As much as he called Luo Binghe an idiot, he was a clever idiot, and eventually he would get to the right conclusion. Shen Qingqiu hoped to not be there when he did.

“So, the jeweler, I would really like you to come with me, or I can bring him here.” Luo Binghe gave him that patient look again, and Shen Qingqiu wished he had eyes he could properly roll. Instead, he wagged his tail in response, thumping it against the floor. If he wouldn’t get time alone either way, he would prefer to get away from the castle for a little while. Hopefully somewhere warmer.

“Great, then let’s go.” Luo Binghe got up abruptly and opened up a path with Xin Mo. Luo Binghe ushered him through, and the view that greeted him made him want to turn back.

It was a bustling city, the sun reflected in the sandy color of the buildings. It would have been pleasant, if not for the looming Huan Hua Palace in the distance. The wave of anger he felt at the sight was a blessing, chasing away the flash of fear.

He hated that place. Hated that cruel prison of theirs, hated that they represented the place where he had lost everything. If Luo Binghe wanted to bring Precious there he would refuse. He would tear away and run the other way.

“Are you alright? You’re staring quite intently.” Luo Binghe crouched down next to him, eyebrows drawn together.

Understanding appeared in his eyes. “Ah, you’ve probably never visited a human city before, but don’t worry, it’s not that different from any city in the Demon Realm. And I’m here to protect you, just in case.”

Just in case what, Luo Binghe? Just in case someone imprisoned him in the Water Prison again? Just in case someone accused him of things he had never done? Just in case some deranged, vengeful disciple decided to ruin his life again? If Luo Binghe decided to give him a tour of the Water Prison he would have no choice but to shove him into the acid himself.

The image of a drowning, burning Luo Binghe was so vivid he almost startled when Luo Binghe nudged him. “We’re going this way,” he said, and lead him in the opposite direction.

Well then, Luo Binghe drowning in acid was a cheerful thought he could revisit on another occasion. He trotted next to Luo Binghe, taking in the sights. He had never really liked the city, mostly because visiting it also meant having to visit the palace. And with the palace came the unbearable Old Palace Master and his equally insufferable daughter.

He wondered if Luo Binghe knew that both father and daughter had the same possessive glint in their eyes when they saw him. He had noticed the Old Palace Master’s budging interest at the Immortal Alliance Conference, had watched with dismay as the old man’s eyes were glued to the screens whenever Luo Binghe appeared. Had made a note to keep him away from Luo Binghe after the Conference was over.

By then, Luo Binghe had grown tall and strong, had started to look more like a young man than a child. Shen Qingqiu might only later realize Luo Binghe was beautiful, but even back then he could see Luo Binghe had turned into a handsome man. He had heard of all the girls swarming around Luo Binghe, but he had never really thought Luo Binghe could fall prey to a lecherous older man.

Shen Qingqiu had steeled himself, mentally preparing himself to go through the same ‘men are terrible, horrible swine’ conversation he had had with Ning Yingying, only with Luo Binghe as the embarrassed recipient.

He never got to have the conversation, instead he got a trial accusing him of being the lecherous swine he meant to warn about. Instead of warning Luo Binghe of men with power, he got to see the Old Palace Master hover around Luo Binghe, grubby hands ready to spread their filth all over his former disciple.

During the trial he had seen the same greed reflected in the Little Palace Mistress’ eyes, though her hands were shamelessly all over Luo Binghe.

It was odd being back in the city, padding down the streets not as a wanted man but as a trusted companion, albeit a companion that received a few lingering looks. The people were far too polite to make remarks about him, but he saw more than one child point and stare. Felt more than saw Luo Binghe’s amusem*nt at their reactions.

A group of young women were far more interested in looking at Luo Binghe than Shen Qingqiu, whispering to each other as they walked by. They stopped by a stall, Luo Binghe picking up pendants and studying them in the sunlight.

“Anything specific you’re looking for?” the stall owner asked.

“No, I’m just looking, thank you.” Luo Binghe flashed her a smile that brought redness to her cheeks, and Shen Qingqiu could hear the young women giggling to each other in the background. He wondered if Luo Binghe would mind if he chased them away.

Luo Binghe held up one pendant so Shen Qingqiu could see it. “I once had one similar to this,” he said, making it look like he was casually mentioning it to the stall owner and not talking to Shen Qingqiu.

“It’s very nice,” she responded, face still red.

“Yes, yes, it is.” There was a wistful tone to his voice, and Shen Qingqiu knew why.

He knew where the pendant was, or at least where it had been hanging from a branch in the middle of the forest. At first, he hadn’t known it belonged to Luo Binghe, had left it there because if any of his disciples didn’t care for their belongings then they didn’t deserve to keep them. After he found out who it belonged to he felt a fair bit of satisfaction whenever he saw it was still hanging there. He had traded a few moments of vicious satisfaction for a life laid to waste.

Had traded it for a life now spent watching as a young woman built up the courage to approach Luo Binghe. She must have been the bravest of the bunch, but still she tugged nervously on her hair as she sidled up next to them.

“Hello,” she said, smiling up at Luo Binghe.

He turned to her with a smile on his face, and although Shen Qingqiu wanted to claw at her legs until she ran away, the emptiness behind Luo Binghe’s smile calmed him down.

“Hello,” Luo Binghe replied, smile widening as he really looked at her.

She was a pretty woman, her shortness accentuated by the long brown hair that matched her eyes. She fiddled with the sleeves of her pink dress as she stared at Luo Binghe. She seemed stupefied by the attention, both of them staring at each other without words.

As a blush spread across her face Shen Qingqiu trotted away. Was that Luo Binghe’s famous charm? Did he simply stare at women until they fell over, most likely from boredom? Shen Qingqiu turned to watch as they delved into small talk, eyes narrowing.

He huffed with distaste, wondering if he was watching Luo Binghe accumulate another wife. She shuffled her feet nervously as she spoke, hands moving up and down like she wanted to hide behind them. If he could speak he would recommend getting a fan, they were excellent to hide nervousness with.

Luo Binghe must have said something vaguely amusing, causing her to laugh. It made him want to gag, watching Luo Binghe flirt his way into her bed. He had no doubt that was where it was heading if it continued.

Fine, then. If Luo Binghe wanted to spend his day with her, Shen Qingqiu could find something else to do. He walked farther down the street, inspecting the stalls as he moved past them.

The street branched off into several alleyways and he stopped at one, looking into the shaded alley. Maybe he could make a run for it and disappear amongst the crowd, weave through the alleys at full speed until Luo Binghe lost his trail.

Freedom called to him, and he took a step forward just to be cut off by a looming figure. “There you are,” Luo Binghe said with a tightness around his eyes that softened when Shen Qingqiu looked up at him. “Did you get bored? You shouldn’t wander off like that.”

Then maybe you shouldn’t flirt with everything with a pulse, he wanted to say.

Luo Binghe gently stroked his ears. “Come on, we’re almost there.”

There turned out to be a small shop with two guards at the door, both of them greeting Luo Binghe as if they were familiar with him. Inside the shop every wall displayed some of the most exquisite jewelry Shen Qingqiu had ever seen.

An older man walking in from the backroom, smiling when he saw them. “Master Lou,” he greeted.

“Master Liao, it’s good to see you again,” Luo Binghe said.

“You too, and so soon!” He gestured for them to come with him to the backroom. It was a large and well-lit room, already set up for tea. Master Liao poured the tea as they talked about the latest news.

Only when their cups were empty did he turn serious. “So! What do you have for me? For which of your wives are we making something?”

Luo Binghe laughed and gestured to Shen Qingqiu. “No wife this time around. It’s for my new friend. Here, I made some sketches.” He reached into his robes and pulled out a folded piece of paper.

Shen Qingqiu’s blood froze. He didn’t need to see the sketches to know what they were, he already knew it would be the collars Luo Binghe had drawn.

Master Liao studied the sketches for a moment before looking at the two of them in bewilderment. “A collar for your dog?”

“Ideally more than one, but this one,” Luo Binghe pointed at a sketch, “would be top priority.”

“I see. When do you want it done?” Preferably never, Shen Qingqiu thought. There was no way he would let Luo Binghe collar him.

“As soon as possible,” Luo Binghe said, unaware of Shen Qingqiu’s building panic.

“Well, something like this might take a few weeks, but since it’s you we will try to have it done faster.” Master Liao said it with enthusiasm, like Shen Qingqiu’s plans weren’t at risk of being ruined.

“Great. The others can wait, though this one should be next.” He pointed at the paper again.

“Ah, a necklace for one of your wives.” He sounded relieved, like he had been questioning Luo Binghe’s sanity.

For a moment Luo Binghe stared, but then he nodded. Ah, Master Liao had referred to the drawing of Shen Qingqiu. He watched with interest as Luo Binghe blushed harder than the woman he had just spoken to. It had to be horrifying for a man like Luo Binghe to think about a man as his spouse, especially if that man was Shen Qingqiu.

Hah! Shen Qingqiu would rather be back in the prison cell than be married to someone like Luo Binghe. Luo Binghe might find the idea disturbing, but he was no catch either. His wives might be happy being one of hundreds, just a fleeting thought in Luo Binghe’s empty head, but Shen Qingqiu had far more self-worth than that. Of course, he wouldn’t want to marry Luo Binghe either way, the beast was intolerable, but being one of many certainly wasn’t appealing.

He looked at Luo Binghe, taking in the easy smile that grew on his face as he spoke with the other man. He had less than a week to leave, less than a week to find an opportunity to escape. Freedom and safety were his ultimate goals, but the thought of escaping made his stomach tighten and heart race.

Master Liao got up and approached Shen Qingqiu slowly, obviously wary as he took his measurements. Luo Binghe’s hand was warm where it rested at his side, his easy smile turning proud as Shen Qingqiu stood still. He had to stand still, because any movement would be too much, would make him snap and bite. His measurements being taken was one step closer to losing everything, and it took all he had to not move and let Luo Binghe coo over him.

He let out a huff once master Liao was done that made Luo Binghe laugh at him. “You did so well, you’re so good. Such a good boy,” Luo Binghe said as he stroked his head. The praise mixed with the dread he was feeling, enhancing his unease.

Luckily, his measurements were all that was needed, and soon they were back outside again. “Do you want to walk around some more?”

What, and let Luo Binghe go back to flirt with that woman? Shen Qingqiu nudged his nose against Luo Binghe’s leg, right next to Xin Mo. He was careful not to touch the sword, unsure of what would happen and unwilling to risk it.

“Then let’s go home.” Luo Binghe led him to a deserted alley where he opened a path back to their bedroom, and Shen Qingqiu didn’t hesitate to go straight to the fireplace.

Luo Binghe smiled at him, that soft open smile he reserved only for Precious, before going to his desk with a sigh. “I had hoped you wanted to explore, but maybe it wasn’t the right place for you. Since we’re back, I should do some work.”

His gaze kept flickering over to Shen Qingqiu as he worked. It was as if he could feel Luo Binghe’s eyes burning a hole in him while he was trying to nap, utterly distracting and keeping him awake.

Eventually, Luo Binghe got up and walked over to the doors. “I’m going to get something, do you want to come with?”

He curled up further, hiding his face with his tail. Let Luo Binghe run around by himself, he didn’t need to follow him everywhere. Luo Binghe left without another word, and Shen Qingqiu was left to listen to the crackling fire. His mind was adrift, full of thoughts, yet he couldn’t get a firm grasp on any of them. He should be planning his escape, he should be figuring out which way to go, but whenever he tried to focus he was distracted by Luo Binghe.

Even with Luo Binghe gone to get something, his mind was still full of him. Where was he going, what was he doing, what was he getting?

Shen Qingqiu sighed, curling up on himself further. He had to escape in less than one week, and once he was away from Luo Binghe it would be easy to stop thinking about him. It was only the close proximity that made Luo Binghe a distraction. With enough distance he was sure the beast would fade from his thoughts in an instance.

The sound of footsteps alerted him that Luo Binghe was returning. The footsteps were heavier than normal, but he could still make out the confident gait he associated with him.

Luo Binghe walked into the room carrying a large wooden bench. He carried it by one arm, unbothered by the heavy weight. The bench was placed close to the fireplace, and then Luo Binghe got all the blankets from the bed and laid them out on the bench in a soft heap before carrying his desk over to the bench, careful so that his work didn’t fall off.

Before Shen Qingqiu could blink, Luo Binghe crouched down next to him and picked him up in his arms before placing him on the pile of blankets. Satisfied with his work, Luo Binghe nodded to himself and sat down next to Shen Qingqiu.

He then proceeded to continue working like nothing had happened, but his free hand rested on Shen Qingqiu’s shoulder. Shen Qingqiu blinked at nothing in particular, struck by Luo Binghe’s odd mood.

He was such a clingy brute! But the hand stroking him felt nice, and he appreciated Luo Binghe moving himself closer to the fire instead of moving Shen Qingqiu. Luo Binghe kept working while Shen Qingqiu dozed, the sound of writing filling the air. He sighed and stretched out, resting his head on Luo Binghe’s thigh. Gentle fingers rubbed his head and ears while Luo Binghe hummed with satisfaction. He closed his eyes, lulled by Luo Binghe’s gentle touches as he drifted in and out of consciousness.

-

One moment he was relaxing in the bedroom, the next he was on all fours running. The sense of urgency from his previous dream filled him. A pull inside of him told him he had to keep running. He had to get to the bamboo forest in the far distance. He didn’t know why, or what was waiting there, but he had to keep running.

He ran as fast as he could, lungs burning, heart racing, but the distance didn’t seem to shrink. He ran until it felt like his body would collapse, and still the distance seemed the same. But he couldn’t give up, couldn’t stop. Whatever was there needed him, called to him.

He ran so fast he missed when his surroundings changed, but there was no way for him to miss his body changing into his true self. The transformation was less graceful than it had been before, the change and the speed making him stumble and fall, his hands stinging as they connected with the ground.

He was back in the disciple robes Luo Binghe had given him, the autumn colors of Qing Jing peak surrounding him on all sides. Gone was the unfamiliar bamboo forest in the distance, he had been transported back home.

His breathing was so heavy he didn’t notice Luo Binghe until he was right behind him.

“Let’s get you up.” Luo Binghe wrapped his arms around his middle and lifted him like he was nothing, just as he had lifted the bench.

Once he was standing Luo Binghe took hold of his hands and dusted them off, holding each one up to inspect for damage. Why would that matter when nothing was permanent in the dream world?

He stood wordlessly as Luo Binghe then dusted off his robes. Luo Binghe could probably have cleaned his robes just by thinking it, but instead he made a show of doing it by hand, his touch burning through the robes.

His breathing was still heavy when Luo Binghe deemed him clean enough, a satisfied smile lingering on his lips. The hands still lingered on his waist and as he slapped them away in irritation the smile grew larger.

“How are you?” Luo Binghe asked, like that was a normal question between them.

He blinked, unsure of where this was going. “I’m well, thank you.” He hesitated before adding, “How are you, Luo Binghe?”

“I am well too. Thank you for asking, Shen Qingqiu.” The reply was stilted and awkward with Luo Binghe holding direct eye contact as he spoke.

“That’s good,” he replied, looking away as he hoped Luo Binghe would end the uncomfortable conversation.

He could tell Luo Binghe was still staring at him, assessing him, so he looked back at him, annoyance building. What was he doing? Why was Luo Binghe talking to him like he had never had a normal conversation before?

It reminded him of the scene from earlier, when Luo Binghe and that woman had been staring at each other wordlessly. What was Luo Binghe up to?

Without saying another word Luo Binghe gripped his wrist. There it is, he thought. Now he would get his bones crushed or hand ripped off, and they would be back to normal. No pain came, instead he was pulled along into the forest, Luo Binghe dragging him with him.

“What are you doing?” he asked, twisting and tugging on his hand and failing to loosen the grip on him.

“I thought we could go for a walk together,” was the reply he got. A walk, together? Why? Did Luo Binghe have some sort of trap set up, some painful instruments of torture waiting for him? Or was he still trying to be nice?

They walked together through the forest, and eventually Luo Binghe slowed down until they were side by side, but still he didn’t release Shen Qingqiu’s wrist. In the end they entered a clearing, the warm autumn sun shining down on the soft grass. Here he was finally let go, Luo Binghe releasing him to sit down on the ground.

He sprawled back, leaning on his elbows and looking up at Shen Qingqiu. His boots knocked into Shen Qingqiu’s bare feet in a steady rhythm as they were once again left to stare at each other.

“What do you want, Luo Binghe?” Shen Qingqiu asked, irritation bleeding into his voice.

“What do you mean? I just want to talk,” Luo Binghe replied, his smile crooked and confident.

He envisioned taking advantage of their positions and kicking Luo Binghe before running away. He saw himself straddling him, hitting him until he stopped moving. Luo Binghe would be solid and warm underneath him, would still be solid but not so warm after he stopped breathing.

Shen Qingqiu frowned. If he couldn’t kill Luo Binghe in the real world when he had him helpless and at his mercy, he would be a fool to try something in the dreamworld.

Still unsure of where this was going, he broke the silence between them. “What do you wish to talk about?”

Luo Binghe looked up at the sky, feet still moving back and forth and knocking into him with every movement. “I met Shang Qinghua,” he said nonchalantly.

Shen Qingqiu raised an eyebrow, adding a hint of mild surprise and detachment to his voice. “Really, he’s still alive?”

Dark eyes flicked from the sky and over to Shen Qingqiu, assessing him slowly. “Yes. He said you might be dead.”

“Maybe I am.” It would be preferable to sharing this moment with Luo Binghe. The oddness of his behavior was grating on his nerves, making him feel wrongfooted. What was Luo Binghe planning?

Luo Binghe sat up quickly and grabbed his hand before pulling him down. The tight grip on his hand made it impossible to refuse, and he only had a moment to shift his knees out of the way before he was straddling Luo Binghe in the same position he had just thought about.

Warm hands crept up his thighs and settled on his waist, holding him down as he struggled to get his feet under him. “I don’t know, you feel alive to me,” Luo Binghe said with a smirk.

The flush settling on his face was unstoppable, and once again he longed for a fan to hide behind. “What are you doing?” he hissed in affront.

“I’m just making sure you’re alive.” Luo Binghe pinched his waist and he slapped at the offending hand, embarrassment filling him faster than anger could.

Luo Binghe let go of him and he was halfway off him when he assessed the smirk on his face. Luo Binghe had ruffled him, but he remembered how Luo Binghe had blushed earlier when it was insinuated that Shen Qingqiu was his wife. How he had stuttered and faltered at the thought.

Mind made up, he dropped down again with all his weight, satisfied when Luo Binghe bit back a punched-out sound. If anyone was to be ruffled by the proximity to another man it wouldn’t be Shen Qingqiu. Earlier he had shrank back when Luo Binghe had gotten close, but again ang again Luo Binghe had proved he wasn’t interested in hurting Shen Qingqiu that way.

Spreading his legs he settled in, looking down at the beast with his most haughty glare. Luo Binghe’s eyes were wide, hands hovering in the air. They settled on the ground, his long fingers weaving into the grass.

He stared down at Luo Binghe with narrowed eyes. “You wanted to talk, so talk.”

Luo Binghe stared up at him, taken aback for a moment before Shen Qingqiu saw him get a grip on himself. He could practically hear him think as the surprised look turned blank. “You said you would sleep with Hou-jun for protection.”

“Yes.” He titled his head, eyeing Luo Binghe critically as his hands slowly crept up his legs.

“Is that something you do? Sleep with men?” Luo Binghe’s hands settled on his waist once more, burning him through his robes.

He slapped one hand in affront, but that only made the grip tighten. “No, I don’t. Not that it’s any of your business.”

A smile sharp enough to cut steel grew on Luo Binghe’s face. “I thought so. You’re just so desperate you’re willing to be the one spreading your legs for once?”

He couldn’t stop himself from tilting his head the other way, even as he knew too much of his behavior as Precious was bleeding through. “For once?”

Luo Binghe hummed, the grip on his waist loosening. “All those women at the Warm Red Pavilion you’ve paid for.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing. Again and again with the insipid rumors! “Luo Binghe,” he said, leaning over until they were face to face, their breath mingling. “I have never slept with a woman. Not the women at the Warm Red Pavilion, not your sweet Ning Yingying, not any woman at all.”

His response earned him a snort. “You’re lying.”

“Why would I lie? I’ve already been found guilty. You’ve already punished me for it and will continue to do so if you ever find me.” He stared at Luo Binghe, weighing his options.

The truth was he was tired. It had only been a year, but he was tired of hearing the same unfounded rumors spill from Luo Binghe’s lips. The rumors had haunted him since his disciple days, but back then he could ignore them. He had nothing to lose by telling the truth, despite how long he had kept it a secret.

He leaned closer, watching Luo Binghe’s gaze turn dark as their breath mingled further. “I said I would sleep with Hou-jun because it wouldn’t be a hardship to do so. I like men, Luo Binghe. I also like being safe, and sleeping with a man as pretty as Hou-jun would be a small price to pay for safety.”

He watched with satisfaction as Luo Binghe’s eyes widened. Something indescribable flashed across Luo Binghe’s face, his hands flexing where they held on to his waist. It felt good to shock him, to have the advantage for once.

They were too close, but he refused to back down now, spurred on by the allegations and secure that Luo Binghe wouldn’t hurt him. “I’ve never slept with a woman. I’ve never taken advantage of anyone in that way.”

Luo Binghe still didn’t look like he believed him, but he held his tongue, gaze burning into Shen Qingqiu’s eyes.

He looked up at the forest around them, mind racing as he assessed their surroundings. “How do your powers work? Do you enter people’s dreams or do you pull them into yours?”

“Both actually.” His tone was smug, confident.

“Can you enter minds and see memories too?” The grip on his waist tightened a fraction, each finger flexing rhythmically.

“No,” Luo Binghe said, his eyes still on Shen Qingqiu. There was a nothing in his demeanor that hinted at a lie, nothing that hinted at anything at all.

He could feel a smile tugging on his lips and he let it grow in all its sharpness. “You liar.”

He leaned back, making himself comfortable on Luo Binghe. “How disappointing,” he murmured.

Looking down at Luo Binghe he raised an eyebrow in mock displeasure and watched as the little beast stopped moving underneath him. The grip on his waist tightened further, turning slightly painful.

When Luo Binghe said nothing he sighed in frustration. With confidence he was only half faking he grabbed the hands holding him and pried them off his body. Even as he pulled them away, he knew that he was only released because Luo Binghe allowed it.

If Luo Binghe didn’t want to talk there was no reason to stay, so he got up and straightened his robes, ignoring Luo Binghe as he sat up.

“If only you had those kinds of powers you could have gone through their memories and seen that I’m innocent.” He fixed Luo Binghe with a disapproving stare, one that had in its time even made Liu Qingge shrink back.

Luo Binghe met his stare with a darken stare. “Even if I could, what’s in it for me?”

This part he was familiar with. Negotiations were part of many tactics. “What do you want?”

Luo Binghe raised his eyebrows, a speculative look in his eyes. “Tell me where you are.”

Shen Qingqiu huffed. “I’ll tell you where I’m not. You’ll even get to ask which region I’m not in.”

“That’s it?” Luo Binghe licked his lips, gaze still burning into him. “I want another question too.”

He sighed, making the proposal seem like a hardship. “Fine, you get one other question.”

He turned to leave, fixing Luo Binghe with one last stare. “Don’t pull me into another dream until you have done as you’re told.”

Luo Binghe nodded in response, and as he walked away he could feel his gaze burning into his back.

When he was alone he found a place to sit down, folding his feet underneath him gracelessly. He couldn’t explain what had just happened. Luo Binghe’s strange behavior and burning eyes had been unsettling, and he had allowed it to spin the situation out of control.

Letting out a shaky breath he closed his eyes in resignation. He had straddled Luo Binghe! It would certainly be detriment to his continuous relationship with the little beast. Hoping the ground would open up and swallow him, he leaned back against a tree and resigned himself to whatever came next.

Chapter 17: The Reluctant Truth

Chapter Text

Luo Binghe rose from the dreamscape after a brief struggle with himself. He wanted to chase after Shen Qingqiu, wanted to demand an explanation, a reason behind his new and brave behavior.

He opened his eyes and found himself back in his room, one hand immediately reaching for soft dark fur as Precious still rested his head on his thigh. There was an uncomfortable residue of heat pooling in his lower stomach, lingering evidence of the fire that had threatened to engulf him as Shen Qingqiu had straddled him and looked at him so disdainfully.

His thoughts had to have been confused, the way the light had struck his face as Luo Binghe had looked up at him had turning his green eyes pale and had simply reminded him of his wife Shi Xingwu. The haughty, cold look across his face so alike the look Shi Xingwu often gave him, even if Shen Qingqiu been the first to stare at him like that.

Precious stretched lazily next to him, clearly enjoying both the heat from the fire and the soft scratches Luo Binghe provided. It was enough to draw his attention away from the thoughts he didn’t want to examine, enough to make him smile and focus on his surroundings.

They stayed quiet for a while, until Precious finally opened his eyes. “Did you have a good nap?”

He turned the scritches into firm strokes down the soft neck, and Precious thumped his tail twice, the now long-established signal of agreement. “Good, that’s good.”

He smiled and quickly took advantage of the mellow mood they seemed to be in to lean down and kiss the top of Precious’ head before getting up, smiling to himself at the almost tangible confusion radiating from the beast.

He headed to his desk but the reflection in the mirror drew him in, beckoning him to come closer. He stared at himself for a moment, taking in the familiarity of his wild hair and dark clothes, lingering on the unfamiliar uncertainty in his eyes.

“Have you ever-,” Luo Binghe stopped himself and turned towards Precious. “I-,” His hands spread out in a halted gesture as he stared at Precious like he held all the answers.

“I’m certain he did those things, why would I entertain his lies? Why-,” He cut himself off, thoughts cluttering his head. He had always been certain of Shen Qingqiu’s guilt, at least when it came to the abuse of women.

He had always known Shen Qingqiu was a proud man, a haughty man. Someone who clung to appearances and perceived merits. Luo Binghe had delighted in destroying Shen Qingqiu’s reputation, had gloated as he saw his pride fracture. He had fabricated lies and embellished half-truths to tear Shen Qingqiu to pieces for the whole world to see, had spent months deciding which untruths would hurt him most if the world fell for them, but this, this had always been the truth. Shen Qingqiu had been an abuser, someone who preyed on those weaker than him, especially women. Especially Ning Yingying.

He had never believed him when Shen Qingqiu had refused to admit to the abuse. Why would one bout of denial now make him doubt his own conviction?

He looked at Precious as if the answers were hidden in the dark eyes watching him. “If he didn’t do it, if he’s innocent, then-,” Luo Binghe stopped himself again to sit down on the bed, gaze lost as he stared at the fireplace.

Why did he even care if Shen Qingqiu was innocent of this, when Luo Binghe had thrown so many false accusations at Shen Qingqiu and gleefully watched as they stuck to him?

Deep down he knew why. “If he wasn’t that cruel to anyone else, then why-,” Luo Binghe clenched his hands, watching as his knuckles turning white. “Why me?” He loathed the faint dip in his voice, the vulnerability he would have killed anyone for hearing.

It seemed like Precious held his breath for a moment, before getting up and padding over. He pushed his head into Luo Binghe’s hands until his fingers uncurled and dug into his fur.

“My good boy, my sweet Precious. Thank you.” Luo Binghe leaned down and kissed him again, feeling the sincerity in his smile. “There’s no point in wondering about it until I know for sure.”

He had a long day ahead of him, and he needed to shake off the old feelings of insecurity that these thoughts brought him. It had been years since he had vowed to never let his former shizun get to him like this.

After one last stroke across Precious’ head, he got up and put on a thick dark outer robe. “We should be going, Mobei-jun is expecting us.” If his voice was a little softer, a little more pensive than usual as he spoke it didn’t matter, it was weakness only shared between the two of them.

With a shake of his head to get rid of the last stubborn doubt he swung Xin Mo and opened a rift, guiding Precious through it.

The cold air hit him like it always did, a noticeable dip in temperature that caressed his bare skin without threat. The great hall of Mobei-jun’s castle was lit with torches, the flames reflected in the gleaming white walls.

Luo Binghe could have opened a rift right into the reception hall, but out of habit and respect he held himself back. Mobei-jun had sworn his loyalty to Luo Binghe after their fight, and in his loyalty he was as close to a friend as Luo Binghe had.

It was that respect that kept him from wrinkling his nose as he entered the reception hall and saw the sniveling little Peak Lord rat huddling next to the enormous fireplace that heated the hall. Mobei-jun’s relationship with Shang Qinghua confused him, but he knew better than to ask him directly. Most likely it confused Mobei-jun just as much.

Shang Qinghua ducked his head when he saw him, scuttling closer to the flames and almost catching on fire in his eagerness to go unnoticed.

Mobei-jun himself was at his desk, sorting through the pile of paperwork that came with running a kingdom. His face remained placid as he looked from Luo Binghe to Precious and back, eyes empty of any thought he might have about the situation. It still told Luo Binghe all he needed to know. Mobei-jun had an issue, or at least thoughts about Precious, and he was unwilling to share those thoughts for the time being.

Precious, for his part, took one look at Mobei-jun and turned away, padding over to Shang Qinghua instead. The two of them huddled close to the fire and as a ratty little hand reached for Precious Luo Binghe felt his mood sour.

“You brought your pet again,” Mobei-jun commented. His presence must have puzzled him enough to make him state the obvious.

“And yours is still alive,” Luo Binghe countered. He looked over at the two of them again, taking in the heavy cloak Shang Qinghua now wore, the thick robes protecting him against the worst of the cold.

“He’s still useful.” Mobei-jun shuffled the papers and got up. And yours is not, was left unsaid. It rankled him how the unspoken words questioned Precious’ existence.

“A dead rat would be more useful. It could serve as a warning to the other vermin.” He spoke casually, observing his friend as Mobei-jun looked over to Shang Qinghua.

“Death is final and would be the end of his usefulness. For now he’s helping me track down your prisoner.” The two of them stared at Shang Qinghua as his hands hovered over Precious’ head, hesitant to close the distance.

As the hand landed on Precious’ head, Luo Binghe caught himself wondering if Shen Qingqiu would object if he ripped Shang Qinghua’s arms off. Shang Qinghua didn’t need arms to help find him.

“Leave him alone and read this.” Mobei-jun handed him a report, obviously transcribed by the man whose hands were living in limbo.

Luo Binghe skimmed through the report, eyes darting over to the duo as Precious stoically let himself be pet. Shang Qinghua on the other hand, looked like he was about to faint as he awkwardly huddled closer to leech off the warmth Precious was undoubtfully radiating. Did he really need arms, or legs for that matter?

“Eyes on the paper, your highness,” Mobei-jun said as he tapped a finger on the report.

“It’s confirmation that whoever it is, is on our council. Still, there’s no definite proof of who it is,” Luo Binghe said once he finished reading.

Whoever was plotting against him had help from someone on the council. It was something they already suspected, but the report helped clarify it. As much as it helped, it was not the news he cared most about.

“And Shen Qingqiu? Has your rat or your men been helpful at all?”

“It’s been confirmed that the area where Shen Qingqiu emerged from the river has been drained of its demonic energy. There was a residual trace that led into the forest before it became too faint to follow. There’s been no trace of him in the Western Kingdom, and he hasn’t been spotted crossing any border.” Mobei-jun looked over at Shang Qinghua. “As for my rat, he’s confirmed that a spell has been used by the river, and that it's not one taught by Cang Qiong Mountain. However-,” Mobei-jun stopped to look over at the Peak Lord.

Luo Binghe looked away, fingers tapping impatiently against his thigh. “However what?”

“He told me there were certain rumors about Shen Qingqiu. That before he came to Cang Qiong Mountain he had a master who knew of such things.”

Luo Binghe shook his head. “Doubtful. Shen Qingqiu hates everything related to demons, and he also came from a family of high standing. He wouldn’t be inclined to learn such things.”

“Did he?” Mobei-jun turned towards the fireplace and raised his voice. “Shang Qinghua, come here.”

Shang Qinghua jumped up and rushed over the moment he heard his name. “What is it, my lordship?” He bowed his head several times, staring straight down at the ground.

“What do you know about Shen Qingqiu before he came to the Mountain?”

“Not much.” He hesitated, head moving minutely back towards the fireplace. “There were rumors of course, but that’s all.” He looked away from them as he spoke, gaze turned inwards.

Luo Binghe could feel his impatience rise, the urge to trample the little rat underneath his boots growing with every nervous gesture. “Tell me.”

Precious padded over to them, his black gaze seemingly fixated on Shang Qinghua. The man’s hands locked together in front of him, fingers fidgeting. “When he first arrived at the sect there were rumors that he had lived on the street. It might have been because he came to the mountain quite late for a cultivator, at an older age than the other disciples. And when he arrived he wasn’t in the best shape, physically or cultivation-wise. Or mentally, really.” His words ended in a mumble and Precious’ ears flicked as he listened, huffing at the last words.

When Shang Qinghua realized he had their full attention he rambled on. “And then there were rumors, just rumors of course! That his cultivation and his fighting was less than honorable. But the rumors quickly disappeared, so I don’t know.” Shang Qinghua’s eyes flickered over to Precious, and Luo Binghe could feel the familiar sensation that something was right there in front of him, that he was on the verge of understanding something.

Whatever it was slipped away as he mulled over what he just heard. “I already knew everything about him is less than honorable, even his way of fighting. His dirty tricks during the demon invasion showed everyone that.”

He still wasn’t convinced. Shen Qingqiu had never spoken of his past, but the way he spoke and the way he carried himself spoke of a man used to a life of leisure. The lazy way his fan would move in front of his face, hiding his expression whenever Luo Binghe dared to stare at him spoke of a man born into wealthy. If it was all a lie, then Shen Qingqiu was a better actor than Luo Binghe gave him credit for. If it was all a lie, then what else had he lied about?

If it was all a lie, did he even know him at all? And if it turned out he didn’t know the real Shen Qingqiu, did he even want to? The thought that Shen Qingqiu had been hiding his true self all along set his teeth on edge.

He closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath before slowly releasing it. He would find out either way. Shen Qingqiu wouldn’t be able to hide forever, and once he was back in Luo Binghe’s grasp he would wring the truth out of him one way or another. In the end did it matter if he was a street rat or a spoiled second son? All that mattered was his history with Luo Binghe. All that mattered was the history they shared.

Faint anger still licked up his spine, and he made up his mind. “Fine. His past doesn’t matter when it comes to finding him. Keep looking. I have somewhere else to be.” It was better to leave than letting the anger getting the better of him in front of Mobei-jun and his pet cultivator.

With a parting nod to Mobei-jun he reached for Precious, guiding him back to the great hall where they came from. He swung Xin Mo, guiding Precious through the rift with surprisingly steady hands.

“This,” he explained to Precious as they exited the rift, “is the city of Mianrao.”

Once a proud little place barely big enough to be called a city, it now contained mostly skeletal remains of burned buildings.

Precious seemed to look around before tilting his head towards him. “It became collateral damage early in my campaign. The previous ruler of the city ordered it to be burned to the ground instead of surrendering it to me and forced the citizens to fight a losing battle.”

The air was full of sawdust and the sounds of hammering, constructions rising around them as they entered the city. It had become almost a routine for him to come here when he had the time, to rebuild with his own hands what he had been partially responsible for tearing down. He hadn’t been here since Precious had entered his life, and in his brief absence the citizens had finished many of the more important structures of the city.

Most of them greeted him calmly, a sense of acceptance built on the mercy he had shown those unwilling or unable to fight against him and being allowed to rebuild the city they had lost. The handful of children present were far more enthusiastic and ran over to him as soon as they saw him.

“Strong gege, you’re back!” Several of the children flung themselves at him, climbing up his legs and holding onto him. They shrieked as he pretended to shake them off, his annoyance mostly faked. He had no feelings either way when it came to children, but they all seemed to take to him immediately, creating a familiarity he wasn’t used to when it came to children.

Precious hung back, spared of the chaos for only a moment before one of the children pointed at him. “Doggy!” At the word Precious hunkered down before falling prey to the onslaught of curious children.

“Be nice to him,” Luo Binghe warned, lifting two eager children away when they tried to climb their newest object of interest. They nodded, heads bowed in chastisem*nt before gently reaching out to Precious, who heaved a sigh of the beleaguered but let them pet him. His dark eyes found Luo Binghe, and he could almost feel the vexation in them like a physical touch.

Amusem*nt filled him at the sight of the great wolf resigning itself to its fate, letting the children cautiously prod him with wonder in their eyes. Once he was sure the children would be cautious he stepped into action, helping the workers as they raised yet another structure.

It was hard work lifting heavy wooden beams and pulling the large structures up, but it let his mind focus on the here and now, it let his body work hard for immediate tangible results. Sometimes he needed to give his mind and body a rest from preparing for the next fight, the next opponent. Sometimes he needed to feel useful in the moment, to be rewarded with results he could see and touch.

As the sun made its way across the sky walls were raised around him, homes were being rebuild, families were given shelter again. The workers gave him orders without hesitation, knowing that he would listen and do as he was told. For all his hard work he was rewarded with a few thankful words, and a few brave hands patting his back.

No matter what he did or where he went, Precious followed him like a shadow, the children following like baby ducklings in his wake. The children cooed and fussed over Precious, but he gave them little attention in return, his attention focused mostly on Luo Binghe. He could almost feel the stare burning a hole in the back of his neck, but whenever he turned Precious seemed to be looking elsewhere.

He didn’t mind the evasiveness from his new friend. For once he wanted someone to see all sides of him, even the soft, vulnerable ones. Perhaps it was strange that he was only comfortable showing these sides to a creature, to something that might be no more than a feral pet, but who else would accept it all? His wives were usually on one side or another, either appreciating his domineering, ruthless side, or his sweeter, more cajoling charms. Wives like Sha Hualing wanted to see him conquer the world, wives like Ning Yingying wanted him home for dinner every day. None really cared for the whole of him.

So, despite Precious being a demonic beast it was still nice to always have him by his side. It felt like a friend, like true companionship.

He glanced over and laughed to himself as Precious evaded the children by jumping onto a low wall where they couldn’t reach him, draping himself along the edge like an overgrown cat. The children shouted their disappointment but Precious paid them no mind, eyes on Luo Binghe as he yawned and settled down.

The focus from such a singular, fickle beast filled him with a sense of satisfaction, and his mind strayed to the collar he had ordered. It would arrive soon and then everyone would know who Precious belonged to. Everyone would know Luo Binghe would have someone by his side forever.

He hammered in the last nails as the sun dipped below the horizon, reveling in the flush and ache that came with using his body for manual labor. Helping out always left him feeling satisfied and tired in a way that training and fighting never could.

Wiping the sweat off his brow he walked over to Precious, cleaning his hands on his robes before stroking that soft fur. “Are you ready to go?” he asked and received two tail thumps in reply. Precious stood up and stretched before jumping down from the wall, keeping close to Luo Binghe as they exited the city.

He kept one hand on Precious’ shoulder as they made their way back, his mind now on what lay ahead. He needed to know the truth, yet he didn’t want to know. He wanted certainty, but he didn’t want the certainty he already had to be broken.

When they stopped he sighed, mind still not made up as he swung Xin Mo and opened another rift. “One more stop before we go home,” he explained as he ushered Precious through the rift and into a familiar garden.

It was a modest outdoor space filled with vibrant flowers and luscious green vegetation that even the creeping darkness couldn’t cover up. Fireflies flittered around them, filling the air with lazy little pinpoints of light that flew around with no discernable sense of direction.

A cry of “A-Lou!” filled the air and almost before he knew it Ning Yingying had thrown herself into his arms, her smile radiant even in the dark. “I didn’t know you were coming!” She smiled up at him, eyes brimming with happiness.

“I missed my Yingying,” he explained and kissed her, appreciating the way she melted into his embrace.

They broke apart and she looked down, squealing in surprise. “A-Lou, you brought a friend?” Immediately after her outburst she pulled out of his arms and reached over to Precious.

“Mhm.” He gestured between them, “Precious, this is my wife Ning Yingying. Yingying, this is Precious.”

Precious was as frozen as a statue. Luo Binghe had been too focused on Ning Yingying to see his initial reaction, but now he could see how motionless he had become. It seemed like he was holding his breath, only his eyes moving as he tracked Ning Yingying’s hand as it came closer.

“Ah, so pretty!” She cooed over Precious, hand hovering in front of him but not yet touching. Luo Binghe was gripped by a sudden urge to slap the hand away, to step between them. Curious he watched as Ning Yingying finally touched him, watched as Precious let it happen but made no further moves. It seemed like even Shang Qinghua’s smarmy touch had been better received than Ning Yingying.

She looked up at him from where she was crouched down. “So, what brings you here, A-Luo?”

He smiled at her and reached out his hand to support her. “I have something to ask, but I was hoping we could have dinner together first.”

“That’s fine, I was about to eat so you came at a great time.” She took his hand and led him inside, Precious trailing behind them with his head and tail low. He had never really given it much thought, but Precious usually walked with a sense of proudness to him, head and tail held high. It had seemed so normal to him that he only noticed when it changed. Why was Precious so apprehensive around Ning Yingying? Was he simply tired after a long day?

Ning Yingying led him to the table as the servants filled it up with food. He sat opposite from her and patted the floor next to him, satisfied when Precious took the cue and curled up next to him.

He let Ning Yingying talk as his mind wandered, one hand busy with the food while the other stroked the soft fur on Precious’ head.

She filled him in on what she had been doing since they last saw each other, which of his wives she had spent time with and what they had been doing and he made sure to answer appropriately, all as he took in her soft smile and her shining eyes.

Why was he even here? How had Shen Qingqiu managed to plant a seed of doubt in his mind? He had never delved into Ning Yingying’s memories of Shen Qingqiu before, had respected and cared too much about her to want to see for himself the horrors she must have faced while he was in the Endless Abyss.

The leftover food was cleared away, and as she laughed at a comment he made it was so easy to get up and sit down next to her, to tip her head up and kiss those soft lips. The starry gaze she gave him softened the doubt he had felt, renewing the certainty he felt that Shen Qingqiu was a liar, that he was trying to trick him once again. Still, he cupped her face and gave her a smile that made her melt into his touch.

“Will you lie down with me for a moment,” he asked, and watched as she lit up. She nodded and he got up, leading her to her bed without words.

She gave him a look as they got into bed together, sensing the strange mood he was in but choosing not to comment on it until they were laying face to face. “You’re being weird, A-Lou,” she said as he took hold of her hand. She still interlaced their fingers as she usually did, not letting his mood change her behavior.

“I know, will you forgive me?” He squeezed the hand he was holding and gave her his best reassuring smile.

“Forgive you for what?” She said just as he reached out to the blood parasites in her blood and forced her to sleep.

He followed her into sleep, walking right into the familiar surroundings of Qing Jing Peak. Ning Yingying walked in front of him, unaware of his presence. Judging by the softness of her face and the coltish shape of her body she could have been no more than thirteen or fourteen, hair still in the braided style she would keep until her coming-of-age ceremony.

He followed her as she unknowingly led him to that familiar little house and he entered it behind her like a malevolent specter. She walked through the house with a familiarity and ease no other disciple could have done, not even Ming Fan. She skipped out of the doorway and into the secluded garden behind the house, bouncing up to where Shen Qingqiu was waiting with a senior disciple. The way Shen Qingqiu looked at her made his stomach clench, in his eyes a fraction of warmth, a hint of softness.

Luo Binghe skipped through the meeting and into another memory. This Ning Yingying was older, her face less round and her hair tied loosely in a low ponytail. They were in a busy marketplace as she walked next to Shen Qingqiu, a small group of disciples trailing far enough behind them that they seemed to be there alone. Shen Qingqiu stopped to buy some fruit, wordlessly handing it over to her before continuing to walk.

The rest of the memory didn’t reveal anything useful so he moved to another one. It was dark and Ning Yingying clutched a small lantern as she made her way to Shen Qingqiu’s house. She knocked and waited until a low voice told her to enter. Luo Binghe followed behind her and stopped as suddenly as she did as their gaze fell upon Shen Qingqiu. He was sitting on the floor, his robes disheveled, and an empty bottle of wine knocked over by his side, another half-full bottle next to it. Ning Yingying recovered quickly and hurried over.

“What are you doing here so late, Ning Yingying,” Shen Qingqiu asked, eyes drifting as he looked up at her. For a moment Luo Binghe felt his eyes on his face before they drifted back to her.

“I,-I-,” she hesitated. “It’s two years since he died,” she said and could no longer hold herself together as she flung herself onto him, clutching his arms.

Shen Qingqiu froze for a moment, eyes wide with surprise and discomfort, before petting her head with stilted movements. “I just miss him so much!” She wailed, holding onto him tighter.

“I know, I know,” Shen Qingqiu said, hands hovering before settling on her shoulders. “I’m sorry,” he added in a soft voice, eyes displaying a sadness he never once showed in Luo Binghe’s presence.

Ning Yingying looked up at him, and surely this was it. Surely Shen Qingqiu saw what Luo Binghe saw; big, wet eyes, red, glistening lips, the way she trembled in his arms. This was the moment Luo Binghe was waiting for, the moment Shen Qingqiu showed just how cruel he was, how he took advantage of her loneliness.

Shen Qingqiu turned away, arms now gently pushing her up and away. “I think you should go to bed, Ning Yingying. Tomorrow will be a better day and we can talk more then,” he said.

Ning Yingying hesitated for a moment before she got up and walked away, leaving Luo Binghe alone with a Shen Qingqiu who was frozen in time now the source of the memory was no longer there. This couldn’t be it? Surely something happened between them? At one point Shen Qingqiu had to have forced himself on her, all Luo Binghe had to do was find the moment.

He sped up his search, sifting through her memories as fast as he could. There was nothing to be found. Shen Qingqiu tutored Ning Yingying, he bought her fruit and gifted her trinkets after he had been on missions. He gave her awkward pats on each anniversary of Luo Binghe’s supposed death. He clearly favored her, but never did anything inappropriate.

Luo Binghe opened his eyes and watched as Ning Yingying still slept, his mind ablaze. Nothing? No inappropriate touching, no abusing his power over her. Just the obvious awkwardness of a man who didn’t know how to be a source of comfort to a distraught young woman. So unlike the unscrupulous lecher in Luo Binghe’s mind.

Luo Binghe took a deep breath and got up, leaving Ning Yingying to sit down at the table again. He poured himself some wine, swirling the liquid round and round in the cup as he thought things over.

It seemed Shen Qingqiu was telling the truth about his relationship with Ning Yingying. Did that mean he was innocent of every accusation coming from someone other than Luo Binghe? He thought back to every humiliating, soul-shattering experience he had with him, and the cup in his hand threatened to shatter in his grip. In the end, did it matter if he was innocent? In the end, Luo Binghe’s experience was the only one that mattered, and the only reason he had decided to publicly humiliate Shen Qingqiu before imprisoning him. If he had been a stranger, or treated Luo Binghe with indifference instead of cruelty, would he had taken revenge in such a way, or at all?

He looked up as Ning Yingying made her way over to him, her eyes heavy with sleep, her lips angled upwards in a soft smile just for him. In that moment he knew that he would have killed Shen Qingqiu for laying his hands on her, even if he had treated Luo Binghe better. He had done neither of those things, which led his thoughts right back to the start. Did it matter what Shen Qingqiu had or hadn’t done to anyone else, when Luo Binghe still had been treated unfairly?

Ning Yingying tucked herself into his side and took the cup from him as he wound his arm around her. “What was that about?”

“I needed to see something, I’m sorry I didn’t explain.” He pulled her closer and looked around, relaxing once he spotted Precious resting next to the entrance.

She swirled the wine around just as he had, eyes on the contents of the cup as she spoke. “Did you find whatever you were looking for?”

He hummed, hesitating for a moment to think it over. “No, I didn’t. I found something else but not what I was looking for.” He looked down at her, wondering how to broach the subject with her.

“Oh. Anything I can do to help my A-Luo?” That was his Ning Yingying, always ready and willing to help him in any way she could. She looked up at him, eyes wide and reminding him of the scene he had just witnessed in her memories.

“You could tell me again, just what happened between you and Shen Qingqiu.” He said it as softly as he could, unwilling to push her too hard.

She looked at him, eyes darting across his face as if searching for something. “It’s as you said, Luo Binghe. He-, he-,” she hesitated. “He took advantage of me.” She looked away.

“But he didn’t,” he pushed back. She looked back at him, searching his face once more but keeping silent. Behind him he heard Precious get up and move closer.

He took hold of her hand, interlacing their fingers. “Why did you say he did?”

Her brow creased as she spoke in a burst of frustration. “I didn’t!” She shook her head and murmured, “I only agreed with what you said.”

He stroked the palm of her hand, acutely feeling his heartbeat pick up as he got closer to the truth. “Why would you do that?”

“Because! Because sometimes, A-Lou, sometimes when you really want something it’s hard to keep saying no. It’s easier to just go along with it. And it was clear to me you were already making sure he would be found guilty by any means necessary. So when you kept asking I just-,” she looked down, fidgeting with her sleeve. “-I just said yes.”

Tears spilled down her cheeks and her voice cracked as she spoke. “I said yes and now he’s dead! He’s dead and I’ll never get to tell him how sorry I am!” He held her as she fully started to cry, her body shaking with each sob.

“You did this! You did this!” She hammered her fists on his chest and he took it without complaint. And he had done it, asking her if something had happened and asking again when she first said no. He had pushed and pushed until he had the answer he wanted to hear.

Her voice changed, turning small as she spoke. “I did this. I did it. I hurt shizun,” she said.

He hushed her, wrapping his arms fully around her and pulling her into his lap where she cried into his shoulder. “It’s alright. I did it. I did it.” He stroked her hair gently, letting her cry herself empty. “You only did what you thought you had to do, and I made you think that way. I’m sorry. It’s alright.”

He held her until she fell asleep and when he carried her to bed Precious followed. She turned towards them as he put her down and reached her hand out, murmuring apologies as Precious let her pat his head. Luo Binghe gently tucked her into bed, making sure she was asleep before leaving.

He felt exhausted as he dragged himself back into the garden again, Precious a warm and silent support by his side. He swung Xin Mo and took them home, barely remembering to close the portal before falling into bed, mind reaching out for Shen Qingqiu before he was even asleep.